anyone else been dropped by a friend randomly? - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-28-2019, 10:22 AM Thread Starter
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anyone else been dropped by a friend randomly?


I was. I think it was because he got new friends. But the last time we hung out, he gave me a dirty look. He never texts or calls me. Whenever I texted or called, he wouldn't answer. I just gave up.

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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-29-2019, 11:07 PM
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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-30-2019, 02:19 AM
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I've been dropped plenty of times by narcissistic, superficial people but in hindsight I would never have called them a 'friend'. Just a lesson. Some lessons are harder than others.

No one will talk to me, they tend to go. Their faces say there's something I should know
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-30-2019, 03:11 AM
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Yeah I have. Everything seems fun and great and then boom, they stop talking to me.
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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-30-2019, 03:20 PM
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Yeah, it seems to happen to me sometimes. I think it's because we either grow apart or they just don't have time to talk to me anymore. I try not to take it personally anymore, but I still think of them from time to time because anyone who has came into my life has meant a lot to me. But I have no control over what they do. It's something that happens.

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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-30-2019, 04:24 PM
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Ive been dropped by a few friends, theres never an explanation, usually they make new friends and leave me behind but the friends ive had, theyve never been very good friends, id be there for them and the minute I need someone theyre gone - no explanation, just radio silence, its so hurtful and its made me fearful of getting close to people, I cant help thinking theres something wrong with me, I just wish that even one of the would let me know why they dropped me, I can never think of anything I did or said to them. I asked a mutual friend why our other friend who dropped me but he just said I didnt do anything and its not about me and didnt say any more, he's distanced himself from me too, I see him less often and we used to be close.

I was really close with an old friend from school the last couple of months, we went to a concert a few months ago together, we went on holiday a few weeks ago and had been meeting up a few times a week over the last while, going to the gym, going for lunch but the last time we went for lunch was the last I heard from her, we had plans to meet twice but she canceled both. Its so hurtful as it was so out of the blue but she's done this to me before and theres never an explanation given.


Her and her other friends dropped a girl from their group a few months ago, they had been really close, had a group chat on whatsapp, hung out all the time, according to my friend (possibly ex friend) they had good reason, said she never listened to them, made all the conversations about herself and was using one of the girls to mind her kids - these are all fair enough reasons to cut out a friend I think but the way they did it was so cruel, they stopped replying to her messages in the group chat, made a new group chat without her and just completely stopped contacting her. They bumped into her in the gym and were so horrible, they were fake nice to her face but the second she left they started *****ing about her. It's weird seeing it done to somebody else, I didnt like the girl they dropped, she was always very rude to me for no reason, didnt even know her and never had a conversation with her but I still felt bad for her as I know how it feels, its horrible.
Its hard not to take it personally as everyone who comes into my life, I really care about them and cant understand what I could have done to make them reject me. If I knew what I was doing I could atleast try to work on myself to fix the problem but I havnt got a clue.

Dont mean to make your post about me, im just going through this at the minute and thought id share my own experience.

Could you ask him what happened? If he's giving you dirty looks could you have said or done something without meaning to?
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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-31-2019, 01:28 AM
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Yeah can't seem to make friends anywhere, The people whom have gotten "close" so to say, eventually cut off most contact with me except when they needed something and even then, communication was rare.

Even on this site, some people have sent PM's only to never respond to my replies. Granted I haven't made a tried and true friend on this website but even potential suitors have all dropped communication with me. I acknowledge that I am not the easiest person to converse with I'm quite "negative" or "realistic", however you want to look at it and that drives people away. I guess I should understand it more since this is a social anxiety site but every once in awhile, you will see a thread on the side bar talking about how members miss X poster who doesn't post anymore and how they talked with them all the time. Yeah, I never had that.

Part of the reason why I can't formulate friendships as well and one reason why folks give up on me is because I don't feel fulfilled with most human interactions. I've detailed this before but in short, I just always feel as though something is left to be had whenever I do finish talking with someone.

These, plus many other factors compounded, are why people "drop" me.

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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-31-2019, 04:09 AM
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Thatís one of the reasons I donít have friends. Every close friend I had turned their backs on me and started bullying me. They ridiculed me, pushed me around.. all that. No more. I donít want any friends.



I've been seeking happiness for years.
I've lived in hiding from the darkness.
I've spent so many hours in question.
I've prayed that God finds me soon.
Only to realize I must find myself.
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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 12:22 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luzali View Post
Ive been dropped by a few friends, theres never an explanation, usually they make new friends and leave me behind but the friends ive had, theyve never been very good friends, id be there for them and the minute I need someone theyre gone - no explanation, just radio silence, its so hurtful and its made me fearful of getting close to people, I cant help thinking theres something wrong with me, I just wish that even one of the would let me know why they dropped me, I can never think of anything I did or said to them. I asked a mutual friend why our other friend who dropped me but he just said I didnt do anything and its not about me and didnt say any more, he's distanced himself from me too, I see him less often and we used to be close.

I was really close with an old friend from school the last couple of months, we went to a concert a few months ago together, we went on holiday a few weeks ago and had been meeting up a few times a week over the last while, going to the gym, going for lunch but the last time we went for lunch was the last I heard from her, we had plans to meet twice but she canceled both. Its so hurtful as it was so out of the blue but she's done this to me before and theres never an explanation given.


Her and her other friends dropped a girl from their group a few months ago, they had been really close, had a group chat on whatsapp, hung out all the time, according to my friend (possibly ex friend) they had good reason, said she never listened to them, made all the conversations about herself and was using one of the girls to mind her kids - these are all fair enough reasons to cut out a friend I think but the way they did it was so cruel, they stopped replying to her messages in the group chat, made a new group chat without her and just completely stopped contacting her. They bumped into her in the gym and were so horrible, they were fake nice to her face but the second she left they started *****ing about her. It's weird seeing it done to somebody else, I didnt like the girl they dropped, she was always very rude to me for no reason, didnt even know her and never had a conversation with her but I still felt bad for her as I know how it feels, its horrible.
Its hard not to take it personally as everyone who comes into my life, I really care about them and cant understand what I could have done to make them reject me. If I knew what I was doing I could atleast try to work on myself to fix the problem but I havnt got a clue.

Dont mean to make your post about me, im just going through this at the minute and thought id share my own experience.

Could you ask him what happened? If he's giving you dirty looks could you have said or done something without meaning to?
Hmm... I don't mind. But that's unfortunate. It may be covert relational aggression

I don't think I said or did anything suspect. I think he just got tired of me and wanted me to know. I was only playing online on his PS3. He wasn't playing at that time. I don't think that would warrent a dirty look.

Late Bloomer or Dead Man, idk
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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 12:27 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tymes Rhymes View Post
Yeah can't seem to make friends anywhere, The people whom have gotten "close" so to say, eventually cut off most contact with me except when they needed something and even then, communication was rare.

Even on this site, some people have sent PM's only to never respond to my replies. Granted I haven't made a tried and true friend on this website but even potential suitors have all dropped communication with me. I acknowledge that I am not the easiest person to converse with I'm quite "negative" or "realistic", however you want to look at it and that drives people away. I guess I should understand it more since this is a social anxiety site but every once in awhile, you will see a thread on the side bar talking about how members miss X poster who doesn't post anymore and how they talked with them all the time. Yeah, I never had that.

Part of the reason why I can't formulate friendships as well and one reason why folks give up on me is because I don't feel fulfilled with most human interactions. I've detailed this before but in short, I just always feel as though something is left to be had whenever I do finish talking with someone.

These, plus many other factors compounded, are why people "drop" me.
Yeah, same. Making friends, especially online is hard. I haven't had one in a long time and they never lasted. I feel like I can't trust people because I wonder if they're doing something behind my back or they'll just burn me/cut me off. You can PM me, or I can, if you don't mind. I'm kinda boring, but we can at least message each other

Late Bloomer or Dead Man, idk
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post #11 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 12:28 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunshineSam218 View Post
Yeah, it seems to happen to me sometimes. I think it's because we either grow apart or they just don't have time to talk to me anymore. I try not to take it personally anymore, but I still think of them from time to time because anyone who has came into my life has meant a lot to me. But I have no control over what they do. It's something that happens.
I agree. It's quite natural

Late Bloomer or Dead Man, idk
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post #12 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 12:29 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Post_Punk_Proclivity View Post
I've been dropped plenty of times by narcissistic, superficial people but in hindsight I would never have called them a 'friend'. Just a lesson. Some lessons are harder than others.
Yeah, I feel you. It's like I'm a magnet for negative people.

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Originally Posted by versikk View Post
Yeah I have. Everything seems fun and great and then boom, they stop talking to me.
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Same, bro

Late Bloomer or Dead Man, idk
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post #13 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 12:45 AM
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Too many to count. If they are people you enjoy being around, best to learn to enjoy the temporary ride while the friendship last. Same with all relationships in general. Or all things in general. That's life.


Enjoy any good things, even the little and menial ones, as you will never know what impending distresses could descend upon you in a moment.
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post #14 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 10:22 PM
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Yep, just be glad they're not in your life anymore, a friend wouldn't do that.

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post #15 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 11:41 PM
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Yeah I have. Everything seems fun and great and then boom, they stop talking to me.

Differences in sense of humour is a general reason for romantical and non-romantical break ups. Some people for example have an insultive way to humour. One usefull way is to not make jokes about people or what they say or do but other things around. Many people stop talking to each other after bad jokes.

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post #16 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 01:15 PM
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post #17 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-19-2019, 07:33 PM
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Yea, most of them actually recently, it happened slowly after I had an episode and they dissappeared one by one, it sucks but it is what it is.

"Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained."
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post #18 of 18 (permalink) Old 08-19-2019, 07:39 PM
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I don't know if I'd call it random, but I've seen friendships just dissolve which was hurtful. In hindsight, some of them weren't great friends to begin with. The kind of people you get a very strong "unstable, will do anything for attention" vibe off of.

One woman would invite me out herself, then make up excuses for not showing (her ex might be there, went to the wrong place, etc). Always seemed to be starting a relationship or leaving a relationship. Just stopped bothering.
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