Am I asexual?!?! - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 10:05 AM
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Masturbating or not does not label you sexual or asexual.s.
We know that. But what a person thinks about or whatever imagery they use to get them off *can* be a clue to what orientation they *might* be.

Having said that, An asexual can still masturbate to porn or wherever and this still doesn't define an orientation. The golden rule I suppose is that asexuals can still do solo sex stuff but they have no desire to share it in person with another person.

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post #22 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 10:26 AM
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Well I'll also say this. But if there was a worst orientation to be, asexual probably would be it. If you're asexual then 99% of the dating pool you're probably going to be automatically excluded from. It's probably almost always going to be a no deal if you say your an ace because almost all people want sex stuff in relationships. At least if you're sexual, no matter what that sexual orientation is, then it means that that part isn't a deal breaker to the compatible other gender/orientation. Asexual is a tiny tiny tiny percentage of a population. It's only about 1%, so it's like finding a needle in a haystack trying to find ANOTHER asexual to have a relation with. Hell, I'd swap being bi for ace because then you've got like twice the opportunity. You can go with males and females. How great that must be that you've got TWICE as much choice than only liking one group. Why bi would be stigmatized in the past I have no idea. BUT Ace? It's nobody unless it's another ace.

People never assume you're ace if you're single for too long. They just think you're gay. (Not that anyone has to me personally but I know that's what they think.)Lol. That's stupid they jump to that conclusion but that goes to show how little being ace is recognised.

It's also very frustrating orientation. You feel like you're missing out and you can't really do much about it. You "think" you should be meeting and banging people but then the desire or motivation isn't there but you still feel you should be doing it. If any orientation wants to cement your future being single and bored, then asexual is probably the "best" one for that.

And by the way, just how included is asexuality in the LGBT community? Is it disregarded? I've read that it's disregarded sometimes. Asexuality isn't called "the invisible orientation" for nothing.

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post #23 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 10:43 AM
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Social isolation can lead people to have social naivety and no sense of humor or understanding of it, causing them to have very cringey reactions to it.
are you talking about me or someone else ?
i was referring to two people here who made comments about their di*ks.
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post #24 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 03:30 PM
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But if there was a worst orientation to be, asexual probably would be it. If you're asexual then 99% of the dating pool you're probably going to be automatically excluded from.
Honestly that would be perfect for me. I'm sick of being straight. I'm not gonna get any girl in my entire life, not only because no one like me, but also I don't want any, I just can't imagine being, dating or even living with some girl... One night stands won't work either, I'm too anxious for that... So what's left... Nothing.

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post #25 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 03:43 PM
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anyway, i make sexuals go asexual if u know what i mean
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post #26 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 06:37 PM
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post #27 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 01:31 AM
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We know that. But what a person thinks about or whatever imagery they use to get them off *can* be a clue to what orientation they *might* be.

Having said that, An asexual can still masturbate to porn or wherever and this still doesn't define an orientation. The golden rule I suppose is that asexuals can still do solo sex stuff but they have no desire to share it in person with another person.

Some asexuals have children, some have sex because they want to please their partner. I personally find it as an odd thought to be that partner which wants to have sex with a person who is not attracted to them but that is not my business.
Also I find it funny how much in common have with aromantic asexual who does commit sex and then sexual people whom just does not care people but are playas, sociopaths, unempathic psychopths etc. The form is at any case same: To have sex just for the sex and a partner is used like an item. I have spoken with aromantic asexual guys which commits sex and I just don't understand the difference. They are like any random sexual guy at nightclubs looking sex only.
Romantic asexuals at least care about their partners romantically even they don't need or desire sex.

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post #28 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 02:38 AM
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Well I'll also say this. But if there was a worst orientation to be, asexual probably would be it. If you're asexual then 99% of the dating pool you're probably going to be automatically excluded from. It's probably almost always going to be a no deal if you say your an ace because almost all people want sex stuff in relationships. At least if you're sexual, no matter what that sexual orientation is, then it means that that part isn't a deal breaker to the compatible other gender/orientation. Asexual is a tiny tiny tiny percentage of a population. It's only about 1%, so it's like finding a needle in a haystack trying to find ANOTHER asexual to have a relation with. Hell, I'd swap being bi for ace because then you've got like twice the opportunity. You can go with males and females. How great that must be that you've got TWICE as much choice than only liking one group. Why bi would be stigmatized in the past I have no idea. BUT Ace? It's nobody unless it's another ace.

People never assume you're ace if you're single for too long. They just think you're gay. (Not that anyone has to me personally but I know that's what they think.)Lol. That's stupid they jump to that conclusion but that goes to show how little being ace is recognised.

It's also very frustrating orientation. You feel like you're missing out and you can't really do much about it. You "think" you should be meeting and banging people but then the desire or motivation isn't there but you still feel you should be doing it. If any orientation wants to cement your future being single and bored, then asexual is probably the "best" one for that.

And by the way, just how included is asexuality in the LGBT community? Is it disregarded? I've read that it's disregarded sometimes. Asexuality isn't called "the invisible orientation" for nothing.

Yes, loving someone without wanting sex with him, that is the worst. Because we love them genuinely but what comes to physical part... We just hurt them for not wanting them back and we just hurt them for not letting them want us. And we might want to want them so badly much but.. We can't.





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post #29 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 05:24 AM
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Honestly that would be perfect for me. I'm sick of being straight. I'm not gonna get any girl in my entire life, not only because no one like me, but also I don't want any, I just can't imagine being, dating or even living with some girl... One night stands won't work either, I'm too anxious for that... So what's left... Nothing.
You only say that because it's just how you feel just now. But I understand what you mean. It's like you might really really like something like an exotic fruit and you crave it and there are some around but they're just too high on the tree out of your reach so now you curse the fact you love this exotic fruit. It's almost like it's tormenting you. B
ut the thing is one of those exotic fruits might ripen and unexpectedly fall to the ground available for you to pick up and now there's your chance. So now you are glad that you love this exotic fruit because out of nowhere you have an unexpected chance. So maybe out of the blue by chance some nice woman might like you out of nowhere. It's still possible.

But if you're asexual then you don't care if a woman likes you because you probably aren't going to be able to give her what she wants. So that's like having exotic fruits available and you don't like them but everyone tells you you should like them and you feel bad or wrong or awkward for not liking them. The only solution would be another asexual woman. That would maybe be the exotic fruit except that it's like only one fruit in a forest of trees and hardly any ripen and fall to the ground for you.

And a one night thing isn't going to give you much fulfillment I don't think. It's basically not far off a prostitute type experience and I suppose one of those is not very appealing. Although, going to a prostitute would be the easiest way by far and they would understand or not care if you were very nervous. I haven't the slightest desire to visit one of those because I don't think I'd like it. I don't even think I would get aroused.

What did you mean by you don't want any? That kind of contradicts the rest of your post.

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If you can read this, you must look at my profile page. I like people who have attention to detail, and curiosity. Have a look, the lion's torso is on diplay :-p
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post #30 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 07:38 AM
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And by the way, just how included is asexuality in the LGBT community? Is it disregarded? I've read that it's disregarded sometimes. Asexuality isn't called "the invisible orientation" for nothing.
If I had to guess, I'd assume the reason it's disregarded is because asexuals aren't a target of the religious bigots that hate the LGBT community. Abstinence isn't considered a sin in any religion's doctrine, in fact religious fundies love abstinence. Most of them want you to be completely abstinent unless you're in a closed heterosexual marriage.
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post #31 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 10:19 AM
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If I had to guess, I'd assume the reason it's disregarded is because asexuals aren't a target of the religious bigots that hate the LGBT community. Abstinence isn't considered a sin in any religion's doctrine, in fact religious fundies love abstinence. Most of them want you to be completely abstinent unless you're in a closed heterosexual marriage.
I was told it is because asexuals has no sexual interest like they have. LGBT they all feel connection together because they are sexuals like heteros but they are not accepted by some people. They all have someone they desire for and commit their sexuality with. BUT: There is also asexual LGBT people. Asexual lesbian likes women but just not want to have sex with them either. If not for pleasing a partner if partner is sexual. Asexuals seem to be a threat to everyone because nobody can take sexual power of them and control asexual.


In western societies there is a lot of things controlled by sexuality and sex. There is a lot of unwritten rules, there is even laws which people accept according to sexual myths/free nipple. Many sexuals are just fine with explanation that woman nipple is satanic sexual thing and man nipple is not. It is perfectly logical for sexually brainwashed people. It stops making sense when you take sex out of it. So then we have just nipples that nobody cares. Commercials are for sexual people, movies, tv-series, books, some dances, sponsors, music, instagram, some work uniforms.... Sex, sex, sex, sex (Blagh). Everything is sold and ruled by sex.



Sexual women cannot also control asexual women by stealing their men, showing they are more pretty in mens eyes, play those who are most popular woman at work place -games because asexual does not give a smelly s. Asexual just observers sexual peoples silly games and wonders how much sexual people do under a flag of sexuality. It is hilarious sometimes. To be honest I do know some asexual women are flirty and play the games because they always get an upper hand.



Certain lines, making especially women embarrased and be ashamed because of their sexuality, I wonder how and why so many women want to play that part which is pointed for them. And how much pain and unpleasant things women are ready to do for their sexual partners. Some women basically do their all decisions to be pleasant for mens eyes and to get a one. So this is when I am happy for not being sexual so far .

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post #32 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 03:40 PM
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What did you mean by you don't want any? That kind of contradicts the rest of your post.
By that I mean that when it comes to feelings and attraction or love, I don't feel that I like them basically, I just feel completely empty inside, I don't feel anything towards women (tbh I started to notice that I get aroused less as well). I don't want to waste any woman's life when I am not able even to show some love for her...
I can't have any end when there's any beginning. I'm literally not interested in relationship anymore.
Way back in some years I thought how it is to be in them, how it feels like to kiss and all that... Now all these feelings are completely gone, I don't care about it anymore.
I noticed that I might be quite harsh towards women as well when I'm angry, that's not what I used to do earlier either, back then I respected them way more. The time goes by the less I care about anything (well that actually no surprise, when I'm just such careless in general by now). Lots of people in general are like trash to me not excluding women. I find anime girls easier to like, but it is just a fantasy, I don't say that it's wrong to dream and fantasize, but there are time when you have to go back to reality.
It's hard to explain, but I just crave for sex, when I don't even like girls anymore... Or else to say I'm somewhat of aromantic...

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post #33 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 05:12 AM
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If I had to guess, I'd assume the reason it's disregarded is because asexuals aren't a target of the religious bigots that hate the LGBT community. Abstinence isn't considered a sin in any religion's doctrine, in fact religious fundies love abstinence. Most of them want you to be completely abstinent unless you're in a closed heterosexual marriage.
If LGBT decides to actively exclude a minority group (even more minority than they are) because they arbitrarily decide they don't belong or don't "fit in" then they are doing so in nothing more merely based on a social construct somewhat arbitrarily. To exclude them to the rain outside is to reject them based on part of what makes up part of their identity. I'd say that's bigoted and smacks of oppression. That'd make an LGBT group no better than a group of homophobes. You couldn't get more hypocritical than that if you tried.

And asexuality is NOT NOT a choice of conscious abstinence. Asexuals can be the target of ANY bigot who refuses to accept that they are"normal" . Didn't you know asexuals can be subjected to "corrective" rape?

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post #34 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 05:21 AM
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So this is when I am happy for not being sexual so far .
So you are happy to not be interested? That's cool. it's good that you can be happy. But still do you want at least a romantic partner and someone to do basically traditional bf/gf stuff with ( just without the 10 minutes genital rubbing)? let us begin with match-making.

Waiting for a beam to break through here,
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First it was so quiet and now I know I am not alone in here.

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If you can read this, you must look at my profile page. I like people who have attention to detail, and curiosity. Have a look, the lion's torso is on diplay :-p
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post #35 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 09:12 AM
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If LGBT decides to actively exclude a minority group (even more minority than they are) because they arbitrarily decide they don't belong or don't "fit in" then they are doing so in nothing more merely based on a social construct somewhat arbitrarily. To exclude them to the rain outside is to reject them based on part of what makes up part of their identity. I'd say that's bigoted and smacks of oppression. That'd make an LGBT group no better than a group of homophobes. You couldn't get more hypocritical than that if you tried.

And asexuality is NOT NOT a choice of conscious abstinence. Asexuals can be the target of ANY bigot who refuses to accept that they are"normal" . Didn't you know asexuals can be subjected to "corrective" rape?

Well, like I said, it's just a guess. All I know is that I grew up surrounded by many, many, many religious people, including my own family. If you showed these religious people a group of asexuals, and then showed them a group of gays, lesbians, bisexuals, trans, and polyamorous people, they would only say that the second group is going to hell.

That isn't to say asexuals are never targeted by bigotry and harassment, just that they aren't specifically hated by the religious right, which is the biggest and loudest opponent of the LGBT community.
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post #36 of 37 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 09:59 AM
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So you are happy to not be interested? That's cool. it's good that you can be happy. But still do you want at least a romantic partner and someone to do basically traditional bf/gf stuff with ( just without the 10 minutes genital rubbing)? let us begin with match-making.

Thanks, I will post my 30-pages long dealbreaker list so you can start searching .

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post #37 of 37 (permalink) Old Yesterday, 07:30 PM
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Well I'll also say this. But if there was a worst orientation to be, asexual probably would be it. If you're asexual then 99% of the dating pool you're probably going to be automatically excluded from. It's probably almost always going to be a no deal if you say your an ace because almost all people want sex stuff in relationships. At least if you're sexual, no matter what that sexual orientation is, then it means that that part isn't a deal breaker to the compatible other gender/orientation. Asexual is a tiny tiny tiny percentage of a population. It's only about 1%, so it's like finding a needle in a haystack trying to find ANOTHER asexual to have a relation with. Hell, I'd swap being bi for ace because then you've got like twice the opportunity. You can go with males and females. How great that must be that you've got TWICE as much choice than only liking one group. Why bi would be stigmatized in the past I have no idea. BUT Ace? It's nobody unless it's another ace.

People never assume you're ace if you're single for too long. They just think you're gay. (Not that anyone has to me personally but I know that's what they think.)Lol. That's stupid they jump to that conclusion but that goes to show how little being ace is recognised.

It's also very frustrating orientation. You feel like you're missing out and you can't really do much about it. You "think" you should be meeting and banging people but then the desire or motivation isn't there but you still feel you should be doing it. If any orientation wants to cement your future being single and bored, then asexual is probably the "best" one for that.

And by the way, just how included is asexuality in the LGBT community? Is it disregarded? I've read that it's disregarded sometimes. Asexuality isn't called "the invisible orientation" for nothing.
My dad assumed I was asexual after watching a TV show with a character who was lol, he's never assumed I'm gay. (And I've had multiple relationships.)

I don't consider myself asexual though because it doesn't seem specific enough and I'm presumably less sexual because I'm paraphilic + dysphoria + the voyeuristic thing. Plus according to that system I'd be more greysexual anyway. Though asexual makes sense when you want to get people off your back or if you have no sexual fantasies at all, and it's true I don't find most people sexually attractive, most of the time.


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Originally Posted by KILOBRAVO View Post
If LGBT decides to actively exclude a minority group (even more minority than they are) because they arbitrarily decide they don't belong or don't "fit in" then they are doing so in nothing more merely based on a social construct somewhat arbitrarily. To exclude them to the rain outside is to reject them based on part of what makes up part of their identity. I'd say that's bigoted and smacks of oppression. That'd make an LGBT group no better than a group of homophobes. You couldn't get more hypocritical than that if you tried.

And asexuality is NOT NOT a choice of conscious abstinence. Asexuals can be the target of ANY bigot who refuses to accept that they are"normal" . Didn't you know asexuals can be subjected to "corrective" rape?
It's true that asexuals are sometimes included and sometimes not, but you should know that no group of people gets along fully with any other group of people under that umbrella. And these days a lot of people don't feel welcome.

I was going to list some of the more popular disputes but honestly just watch this video for the tip of the iceberg:

edit: linked the wrong video before https://@www.youtube.com/watch?v=utW1ItcMeJw

Then in addition it's not a group for all sexual minorities, they're very clear on this because a lot of people believe in this idea that if they're too accepting society will collapse (and that includes LGBT people,) and they all have a different line of where that's at lol...

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