The Ultimate Compliment! - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 12:48 PM Thread Starter
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The Ultimate Compliment!


Guys when youre on this road, which is social excellence the best compliment you can ever get is:

"Youve changed so much!"

That myfriedns is the ultimate compliment, everytime you hear this youll know your work is done, so guys, I challenge you positively to actively look for this compliment with people you havent seen in a while.

Last weekend I went to this city, met up with some friedns from last year, when they met me I was extremely shy and quiet, I was just havign fun and talking with them, then boom the bomb is dropped "JC, youve changed so much!" BOOM "YES!" ultimate compliment times deluxe!

People you see evryday wont change the way they see you, its only people you havent seen in a while that will notice, so never take a reference from the people you see everyday who say "youre so quiet" cause they cant see change

Game on!

-JC

"Identity Level Change; Total Self Trust and Never Looking Back"

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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 02:38 PM
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I sooo know what you mean! I've heard this several times recently. People keep telling me how quiet and depressed I always was a year ago and how much more outgoing I am now. It's one of the best things you can hear from someone. It gives me the confidence boost to improve even more =) I hope everyone here gets to hear this someday.

yay for progress
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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 06:56 PM
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 06:57 PM
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I love this compliment!
Ive gotten it twice recently
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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 07:25 PM
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Ha! No one ever says that to me.
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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 09:30 PM
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i think working at a retail store helped me a little. i dont have to talk much but sometimes people talk to me and i respond the best i can. i saw someone i knew and they said i dont seem as shy as i used to be but i was just trying really hard to relax
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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-28-2008, 09:41 PM
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For me, it was an overheard conversation. It ticked off the recipient.
You will also notice that some people around you will want to be around you more.

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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 12:22 AM
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I remember when I was a teen visiting my step brother. I overheard him talking to someone on the phone and he said I was a real cool dude. It was a relief knowing what he really thought about me so I was relaxed around him and we had some fun times.
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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 06:06 AM
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Yes. That happed to me during my last job. I was there for 6 years, from age 20 to age 26. The first .. two years or so, I was soooooooooooooooooooo quiet, so axious, etc.... but then as time went on my one supervisor noted changes in me. She said, "You've grown/changed so much since you started here, I see a big difference in you." So although she was with me every day, she did notice the change. And it did feel good to hear it. It was nice too because we actually became pretty close, my supervisor and I.

I thought about it and could see it, for sure. I mean, I wasn't "cured" or anything of SA but I did go through some definite transformations while working there.

"Riders on the storm; Into this house we're born; Into this world we're thrown. Like a dog without a bone; An actor out alone; Riders on the storm."
~ Jim Morrison ~
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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 06:10 AM
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Game on!

Sorry, I'm bored.
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post #11 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 01:44 PM
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Sorry, I'm bored.
I grant thee forgiveness!
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post #12 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 02:04 PM
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that comment has a double meaning. someone told me the same comment but in a different way.

two friends that i used to go out with came over not too long ago. we were talking for a while, then out of nowhere one of them said "what happened to you, man? you used to go out with us all the time. you've changed so much. you don't even go out anymore, it's depressing."
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post #13 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-29-2008, 06:49 PM
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that comment has a double meaning. someone told me the same comment but in a different way.

two friends that i used to go out with came over not too long ago. we were talking for a while, then out of nowhere one of them said "what happened to you, man? you used to go out with us all the time. you've changed so much. you don't even go out anymore, it's depressing."

"Riders on the storm; Into this house we're born; Into this world we're thrown. Like a dog without a bone; An actor out alone; Riders on the storm."
~ Jim Morrison ~
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post #14 of 18 (permalink) Old 10-30-2008, 11:07 AM Thread Starter
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Im talkign about a compliment that comes from your efforts on walkign a positive way, what you just said isnt a compliment, when you are actually workign on overcomign your SA and you get it its awesome times deluxe

"Identity Level Change; Total Self Trust and Never Looking Back"

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post #15 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-06-2008, 11:08 AM
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Ah yes- I'm slowly getting closer to that pinnacle, and when I do it is going to feel like a sweet, sweet victory!
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post #16 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-06-2008, 11:12 AM
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I got a compliment from my best friend's friend at college. After the first time I met him, my friend told me that he talked about me a lot, and said I was the man, and wanted me to visit more often. I was quite flattered

Once you give up all hope is when you have truly lost.
-A great friend
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post #17 of 18 (permalink) Old 11-11-2008, 01:59 PM
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I don't know, I haven't gotten that comment in a while, but when I did get it I felt happy, but not complimented; they perhaps meant to compliment me, but they were in fact complimenting my meds, which don't feel a need for compliments
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post #18 of 18 (permalink) Old 06-08-2015, 08:32 AM
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I hope I'm able to get a compliment like that someday.

What's normal to someone is whatever they're comfortable with.
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