Join a club on campus - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 11-20-2009, 09:08 AM Thread Starter
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Join a club on campus


I've decided that, since I'm going to be at school for another 6 months, I really don't want to be alone every hour of my day that's not spent in class. I don't expect to make too many great, close friends because 1)I obviously have really bad social anxiety, 2)I don't drink or do any kind of drug and most kids on a college campus do, and 3)I get nervous hanging out with groups of more than 4 or some for longer than an hour.
So, in order to get myself out of my room for about an hour a few days a week, I've decided to join a club or two. I'm thinking about the school newspaper; I want to be in culinary publication after I graduate. There's also a club, Chefs Sustaining Agriculture. I'm a strong believer of using local and sustainable ingredients in cuisine.

"It is the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more." -Albus Dumbledore

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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 11-20-2009, 05:34 PM
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I really encourage this. 2 years ago I joined a sports club and was able to make and keep 2 really good friends. Its a great way to make friends because you automatically have something in common. I hope you don't get too nervous and back out, I really think this will help you. Go for it sister!
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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 11-20-2009, 11:36 PM
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Hey Meggie, I know how you feel I just moved to a new city to attend college and I hate being stuck in my apartment when I'm not on campus. Both of those organizations seem relative to your career goals and very interesting and doable.

I want to join Toastmasters International and AITP(Association of information technology professionals). I really do not have the courage to join Toastmasters which is unfortunate, I just think it would be a disaster. AITP seems doable though they host guest speakers, do resume workshops, and some social stuff like networking events, things like that.

In the past before I developed this crappy social anxiety to the level it is now I had a wide variety of friends of different ethnicities, genders, age, etc... but I feel kind of intimidated going to this new school. the school is like 99% African-American students and I am caucasian. I've never been a minority at school. Kind of a culture shock for me. I hope I can fit in. So far the students have been very friendly to me in the extremely limited social interaction I have engaged in.

Well I hope that you do decide to join one of these organizations and I look forward to hearing about your experiences if you decide to do so.

I don't use drugs either besides a low dosage of xanax. I hate drinking so I avoid clubs and social gatherings where alcohol is present. I would probably be better off drinking as far as my quality of life goes as far as my social life is concerned. But yea there's two weeks left in the semester and I haven't made a single friend this Fall, kind of depressing. I seem to have grown emotionally numb and I usually don't care but there are times where I long for the simplest things... even a random conversation with someone I don't know at all is satisfying to me. Hopefully I can meet at least like 1 or 2 people before I graduate...

I know this isn't related to your topic but do you exercise? I'm just curious, that is a good first step. When I go to the gym I share something in common with the people there and that is one of the few places that I am able to strike up conversations with people my age. At the moment when I exercise is about the only time I truely feel at peace and like a normal human being.

Maybe you can inspire me to do the same. Good luck.
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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 11-24-2009, 08:00 PM Thread Starter
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Well, thanks. There aren't any meetings until after the Thanksgiving break, but I'm planning to go to at least the two clubs I mentioned before.
You should join a group too. I was getting really depressed and just cried all of the time that I wasn't in class. I also found myself just wanting to have some sort of social interaction because I was so alone. I always knew that I would at least have my boyfriend to talk to at the end of the day.
I do exercise, but in my room. My dad has suggested that I go to the gym as well, but I get nervous exercising in front of people. I might try it, but it makes me really nervous.
Anyway, we should keep in touch with each other. I'll need someone to give me support!

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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-05-2009, 01:44 PM Thread Starter
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Just an update (if anyone cares)...

This past week, I went to a meeting for the school newspaper. It went really well- everyone was really nice, had great ideas for the paper, encouraged my opinion even though I'm new, and seemed really smart and dedicated to the paper. I'm even writing an article for the next issue!
I also went to a meeting for the Avant-Garde Cuisine Club. (Without a complete definition, avant-garde cuisine is sort of the study and use of "science," i.e. the physical and chemical processes that occur while cooking and how to transform ingredients using this knowledge, in cooking.)

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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-05-2009, 10:26 PM
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That sounds awesome especially avant garde cuisine. Glad clubs are going well for you. The people at the newspaper being open and willing to listen is definitely a big plus too.

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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-06-2009, 06:39 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the support!
Got another meeting I'm planning to attend this week.

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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-06-2009, 07:31 PM
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Nice job on going to the meetings. The Avant-Garde Cuisine Club sounds especially neat. Good luck with your article!
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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-12-2009, 10:31 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks!
I sent my article to the editor on Thursday. I was actually quite pleased with it.
I attended a meeting of the Chefs Sustaining Agriculture on Thursday night. A monk from a monastery about 10 miles away from my school makes all different types of gourmet vinegars. He came to talk a little about vinegar making and we tasted a bunch of his vinegars. It was pretty cool.

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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-13-2009, 02:11 AM
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Hey, great for you! I've always been kinda hesitating when it comes to joining clubs, always fearing that I'm gonna be ignored by everyone there and I feel like I may just end up doing things all by myself, which I feel is not fun at all.

All the best with your future articles!

I'd like to think that in the end, it will be worthwhile.

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post #11 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-14-2009, 08:41 PM
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good luck, you'll like it. I joined a club at my school this semester, and i'm going to continue next semester. I've met some people only on the acquaintance level though. It's hard for me to truth people and let people into my life. But i'm getting there, my social anxiety still gets in the way. Even at the meetings i just sit there like a statue, but i'm glad that i'm there w/ people and i feel like i've made a step. I'm happy for you!


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post #12 of 12 (permalink) Old 12-16-2009, 08:40 AM Thread Starter
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Thanks!
I feel the same way- even though I just sit at the meeting and don't really talk or anything, I'm still taking a step to "recovery." A month ago, I wasn't even leaving my room for anything other than class.

"It is the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more." -Albus Dumbledore

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