What exactly is this? - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-01-2018, 09:20 PM Thread Starter
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What exactly is this?


So I made a post about this a couple years back. I never got it clarified but I just started thinking about it again.

Basically, I daydream a lot, about a fantastic lifestyle or putting myself in fantasy worlds like from movies or random stuff like that. When I do, I have to play with my hands to simulate the movement of myself, characters, and objects in my head and I make sounds to simulate.....sounds, lol.

It provides a clearer image for me and feels uncomfortable to not do those things. I've done this since childhood and I don't really get it. I do it in private because I get self conscious if someone sees me (even when I was 5 years old, I felt this way).

Now my brother does the same thing and he has Tourette syndrome but he also has audible tics beyond that and I do not. And a friend of mine has a daughter with autism and although that's probably a separate diagnosis all together, I noticed and found it interesting that she moved her hands in a similar fashion.

I'll probably end up asking my therapist about it, even though I find it embarrassing to reveal but I'm very curious as to what this is. And I thought I'd see if anyone here had a similar experience.

"He's dying to get away, let the pain of yesterday go slipping through the cracks
Hiding himself away, watching all the memories fade away from red to black"
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post #2 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-01-2018, 09:35 PM
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I read somewhere(?) that people with maladaptive daydreaming are known to move around as if actually interacting in their daydreams. I myself used to do that (I would do it in the dark because it was embarrassing, me moving my arms around like I'm a horse galloping and getting these dramatic looks on my face, for example ), as well as listen to music loudly, partly to provide a soundtrack and partly to cover up any noises I might make. Over time the specific motions were replaced by pacing around and simply imagining specific motions in my mind. When not listening to music, I sometimes find myself grinding/clicking my teeth to a mental soundtrack as I'm imagining things.


Edit, I don't like using the term "maladaptive" because for me this is not a maladaptive or unwanted behavior, and I don't think it's an actual diagnosis, but this is what everyone else calls it.

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post #3 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-01-2018, 09:39 PM
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It's healthy. Keep exercising your brain, kiddo.

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post #4 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-01-2018, 11:14 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by neonknight77 View Post
It's healthy. Keep exercising your brain, kiddo.
Don't know enough about it to dispute that but ultimately i just wanna know what to call it.

"He's dying to get away, let the pain of yesterday go slipping through the cracks
Hiding himself away, watching all the memories fade away from red to black"
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post #5 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-01-2018, 11:21 PM
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absorption_(psychology)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantasy_prone_personality

But if any official group decide to pathologise this (not sure how they will because it's about as useful as 'emotional dysregulation' being made it's own disorder... Vague as ****,) I assume they'll stick it under 'dissociative disorders'

I imagine it's associated with certain personality traits, and certain personality disorders, oh and the autism spectrum.
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post #6 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-02-2018, 12:32 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Persephone The Dread View Post
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absorption_(psychology)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantasy_prone_personality

But if any official group decide to pathologise this (not sure how they will because it's about as useful as 'emotional dysregulation' being made it's own disorder... Vague as ****,) I assume they'll stick it under 'dissociative disorders'

I imagine it's associated with certain personality traits, and certain personality disorders, oh and the autism spectrum.
That FPP page was interesting because there is another part that I didn't really mention. On occasion I have daydreams about myself in an ideal scenario in life. I don't move my hands or make sounds but I do mouth words of the conversation going on to my head and react accordingly to the response as well like smiling or frowning.

For instance, I've often thought of myself going on a date with a girl and the whole scenario is perfect. I'm confident, funny, we're having fun. And I become invested in this scenario only to snap out of it after a few minutes and realize that it wasn't real. I'm not completely unaware of my surroundings; I guess its like thinking about a memory but that memory is false and non-existent. And the characteristic features listed on that page reminded me of these occurrences.

I'll bring it up to my therapist when I see her again and basically explain my 2 scenarios.
-Total fantasy scenarios where I'm the hero or villain of a story based in some random universe (like a Star Wars story, random example) or where I just imagine a story in my head with made up characters.

-Ideal scenarios where I am as perfect as can be and the scenario in my head can be positive or negative. For instance, the perfect date scenario like I mentioned above would be the positive one. A negative one is where something bad happens to me but I overcome it; maybe I get mugged but I catch the mugger and beat the hell out of him or I'm being bullied and furiously beat the guy down. In these cases, I can feel the anger in me. My heart rate rises, my adrenaline starts kicking in, I feel the beginning of sweat forming. Generally the people I think of hurting are people I've had negative encounters with in my past.

I will say I've never felt compelled to act on these negative scenarios. But I'm interested to see where this all might stem from. My initial guess would be based on Developmental Pathway #3 mostly.

We'll see. Thanks for the replies guys.

"He's dying to get away, let the pain of yesterday go slipping through the cracks
Hiding himself away, watching all the memories fade away from red to black"
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post #7 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-02-2018, 03:11 AM
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Originally Posted by tehuti88 View Post

Edit, I don't like using the term "maladaptive" because for me this is not a maladaptive or unwanted behavior, and I don't think it's an actual diagnosis, but this is what everyone else calls it.
It's referred to as "maladaptive" because "They often reported distress stemming from three factors: difficulty in controlling their fantasies that seemed overwhelming; concern that the fantasies interfered in their personal relationships; and intense shame and exhaustive efforts to keep this "abnormal" behaviour hidden from others.
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post #8 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-02-2018, 03:45 AM
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Maybe its maladaptive daydreaming
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post #9 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-06-2018, 03:41 PM Thread Starter
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So I talked about it with my therapist. I never took note of it, but when I have my fantasy scenarios, I do so when I'm lonely and my ideal scenarios come from events in my life that give me stress, like a crush or family troubles. Like I do it to escape out of reality for a bit, to release pent up emotions.
She suggested I keep notes of when I do this just to explore it more for our next appointment.

"He's dying to get away, let the pain of yesterday go slipping through the cracks
Hiding himself away, watching all the memories fade away from red to black"
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post #10 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-11-2018, 07:58 AM
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Holy crap I thought I was the only person that did this, I always felt like I was just thinking to hard about what was going on in my head feels good to know theirs other people out there just like me.
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post #11 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-17-2018, 09:20 AM
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Originally Posted by MondKrabbe View Post
So I talked about it with my therapist. I never took note of it, but when I have my fantasy scenarios, I do so when I'm lonely and my ideal scenarios come from events in my life that give me stress, like a crush or family troubles. Like I do it to escape out of reality for a bit, to release pent up emotions.
She suggested I keep notes of when I do this just to explore it more for our next appointment.
Your "fantasies" are negative?
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post #12 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-17-2018, 06:43 PM Thread Starter
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Your "fantasies" are negative?
Depends on the situation. One time, two of my brothers got in a bad verbal fight and I was on the sidelines of it. One of them keeps making mistakes that affect the family and in my fantasy, I wanted to scream at him for all the **** he caused over the years, that he takes everything my parents do for him for granted and all that.

"He's dying to get away, let the pain of yesterday go slipping through the cracks
Hiding himself away, watching all the memories fade away from red to black"
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post #13 of 13 (permalink) Old 04-18-2018, 03:36 AM
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Depends on the situation. One time, two of my brothers got in a bad verbal fight and I was on the sidelines of it. One of them keeps making mistakes that affect the family and in my fantasy, I wanted to scream at him for all the **** he caused over the years, that he takes everything my parents do for him for granted and all that.
Wow this is super interesting. I have had multiple night time dreams where I do similar things ;screaming at people in my life about all they've done wrong and such. DEFO sounds relatively similar in nature!
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