You're not alone.

Are you seeking help?

Write or call the samaritans, of course. Like in those moments of rage and frustration I would have the delicacy to look around for my phone and just dial whatever number it is. I'd be at the first digit and the phone smashed to pieces against the wall. Some of those suggestions are not very practical if you've been there really. These are emotions that suck you up whole in two seconds, you don't think, you just need an effective outlet to let it ooze out and getting physical is what numbs it inside. I've tried chilli pepper and it doesn't work on the long run, you become used to the spice and you don't feel it anymore.

Yeah I'm seeing a therapist this Wednesday about all the thoughts that I'm having. I'm tired of feeling lonely all the time, I just wish I had people to talk too, but anyone they add me on Skype or anything they end up ignoring me in the end and I always end up blaming myself.... hopefully the therapist will sort these thoughts out that I have.

Thanks for the friend request. Please feel free to PM me about anything and everything, I will do my very best to support you. It generally takes me about 24-48 hours to reply.

You are not alone.

^ You're really awesome.

I should probably move the things in my room that can cause harm when I'm not in the best mindset. But I'm too lazy. I have a knife in my desk drawer and a coil of rope under my bed for ****s sake. Silly of me. Eh, whatever.

Thank you!

i also find medication does help if there is that instant desire that overcomes you to self harm or do something drastic

I've been slowly falling back into self-harm/suicidal thoughts after being out of the game for a few months. So I'll have to dust off some coping mechanisms tonight. My go to one is always just lying in bed, headphones on, blasting some music so loud that I can't hear my own thoughts. Just trying to focus on all different sounds. I prefer using music that sorta matches my mood. Happier songs feel phony to me. Like I'm lying to myself.

I was in a very dark place just these last couple of days and found myself unable to keep from harming myself. I did know about the Samaritans thing and was writing them both days while I was down, which kept me from doing worse... but I now have this bookmarked! This is amazing!!!

Last night I ran through the list of coping mechanisms and tried a bunch of them. I tried urge surfing, calling the Samaritans (couldn't get a hold of them), waiting 20 minutes, and finally just fell asleep.

But I woke up just now and I still want to cut, even worse than last night. I don't know what else to do. I don't want to call my therapist because I think she might call the police on me. I'm shaking really badly and 'tic'ing from my tourettes. The need to cut is so strong and so powerful it's unbelievable.

I don't know if exercise was mentioned, if it was sorry for the repeat. I've found running is very effective.

I used to self harm until I started doing hard core drugs. Sticking a needle in your arm is like incorporating self harm with drug use. Thought I'd found the answer but that just took my life to a whole new level of hell since I was too stupid to realize that's where it'd take me in the first place, didn't think things could get much worse but man I was wrong. It's crazy how much worse life can get when you swear it can't get any worse than it is already. Swear hell exists on earth for some, for others heaven. This whole shindig is one helluva messed up trip. Can't wait till the ride is over with.

Calling a suicide hotline has helped me.

Calling to talk to random person has helped me. I don't know why...but talking to someone, anyone,...helps

Hey everyone im new here, I suffer from ptsd and social anxiety disorder caused by getting cancer in my teens which I was never able to put behind me, I actually hate myself for it and caused me ro loose almost all my self esteem and think im not good enough for anything or anyone even though I had a lot of friends and girlfriends etc, eventually I started absukng drugs just to not deal or think, immpresxribed 120 2mg xanax and 120 2mg klonopin obviously I dont take near close to that many but thats nor what my point of this post is.. I was also in 2 bad car accidents and was prescribed 180 30mg oxycodone IR and at first was using it normally occasion sniffing it , but iver the past 2 years ic been injecting them, is that considered self harm b.c I cant stop im more addicted to the act of shooting and seeing the blood shoot into the syringe and its caused me sxars to the point im ashamed to wear short sleeves and summer is a nightmare for me I just wear button ups wirh a shorr sleeved shirt umder it and leave it un buttoned then roll my sleeves up below my elbows which adds ro my social anxiety but as much as I wanr to stop and I know I can its just the scars and that I can never wear short sleeves again

First of all, after reading all of that, you need to start taking the mindset that you are a survivor. Cancer is one thing, but two accidents? Come one, you are still here to tell your story.

I know there must be some survivor's guilt but that also needs to be worked on. You have been through a lot - be kinder to yourself!

How do you cope with visible scars from cutting? Do you cover them with clothing?
Has anyone had experience being out in public with visible scars?

Last year I promised myself I'd stop cutting, I got a tattoo on my wrist and promised myself I'd cover the scars on my arm with tattoos once I had the money to.

Until then for years now I've been wearing long sleeve tops and cardigans, even in really hot summer, because I'm not brave enough to show them. Not even my family really knows. I'm really worried people will say stuff about my scars if I show them and I don't like to look at them myself...

They really upset me too. I cover them with long sleeves and sometimes very large bracelets. They will fade with time though, if you're pale they may eventually be hard to see unless someone's really paying attention and then you can just safely go out without covering. I still see them though, I don't like having that reminder.

No one has ever mentioned my scars to me. Whether that's because they didn't see them, saw them but didn't know what they were, or knew but didn't want to have that conversation, idk. But they've never been brought up, no one has ever talked to me about it.

Although I'm very pale, mine tend to stand out - I'm guessing because some are a little bit deep. I've read to see it as a reminder of what I've been through and how brave I am, but I just don't see them that way or think if I could ever see it that way.

The last and only time, someone I am very close too, saw them and called me stupid. Honestly, it was a pretty heart-wrenching moment as I was at one of my lowest points. It's probably good nobody has bought it up or pointed it out, unless you are still doing it - then you'd think someone would show some concern.