Self harm coping mechanisms (Trigger Warning) - Page 3 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #41 of 110 (permalink) Old 09-22-2013, 09:59 AM
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Instead of inflicting that anger on yourself, reflect it on to something else. Be it an object, project, exercise or sticking a pillow over your head and screaming.
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post #42 of 110 (permalink) Old 09-26-2013, 03:33 AM
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I think i'll explain , Samaritans as said by the OP , are a bunch of jews who are apparently dissed by the rest of the jewish community , so whoever is into Judaism is taught to think that the Samaritans are outlaws ; hoped that I explained well ;D
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post #43 of 110 (permalink) Old 10-24-2013, 06:33 PM
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Thanks, I wish I would have found this years ago. I have learned to do something constructive when I have the urge.( paint, draw,sculpt) Or When that doesn't work having old china sets to explode on the driveway really helps. Thanks for the contract. I Will be using it, even though I haven't done anything in a few years ( with the constant help of my husband) I still get the urge when emotionally distraught.
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post #44 of 110 (permalink) Old 10-31-2013, 12:08 AM
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Originally Posted by Greensong View Post
Don't worry about your coworker. Back when I was in the corporate world a woman would stare at my arms whenever I was around her. I had just gotten to the point where I was comfortable wearing short sleeve shirts which show my upper arms. I was always so afraid she'd put me in the spot.
Now that I'm out of that environment I realize that I had nothing to worry about.
If anyone asks or points out your scars, just simply say its none of their business making sure you look them right in the eye as a challenge.
Good luck.
once I was thinking of saying my mom used to do as punishment when I was young
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post #45 of 110 (permalink) Old 11-05-2013, 03:51 PM
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I'm actually so thankful for this post as it's given me a few new things to try. I'm a burner rather than a cutter but somehow have always managed to get away with it, a few times people have questioned but I usually have them bandaged, the one time someone I really look up to saw me for the first time after 3 years my heart stopped when they noticed them and were so concerned I never told them the truth.

I'm going to try a few things from here mainly ones that get me away from my house where there are too many temptations to do damage to myself.

Someone mentioned running, I never thought to do that to be honest but it makes good sense as I can just run the mood off.
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post #46 of 110 (permalink) Old 11-05-2013, 03:52 PM
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I wish I could edit posts on here, I'm so quick to post without spell/grammar checking and when I look back I cringe at my posts grammar.
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post #47 of 110 (permalink) Old 11-15-2013, 11:48 PM
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I've only cut myself a few times and burnt myself once. It was a time of great distress and I felt I was losing control of myself. I loathed myself more than anything. Now I've recovered a bit and have no more urges. I have had urges but they were weak. I guess the intense sadness was replaced by an abysmal void.
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post #48 of 110 (permalink) Old 01-09-2014, 12:44 AM
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Do you still want to hurt yourself?

So youíve tried everything above, or at least most of it. Youíve made a contract with yourself, youíve slept it off but these feelings are still there and they are very distressing to you. Youíve called the Samaritans, youíve called a friend, but there is still a massive craving in the back of your mind. It feels like self-harm is the only option, at the moment. I understand how this feels and you must be in a really bad place right now, and Iím sorry that you are feeling this way. Iíd like you to consider 4 things right now.

1) Why do you need to hurt yourself? What has made you want to do this?

2) Have you been in this situation before? What did you do to deal with it then? How did you feel about it then?

3) What are the things you have done that have helped you to ease the discomfort? What coping mechanisms have you tried? Can you try any more? What else can you do that wonít hurt you?

4) Will you regret this decision later on? How will you feel about it tomorrow? Do you still really WANT to do it?

If you do self harm (which I hope you donít)Ö

Warning - this might be triggering for some people.

If you have self-harmed, I want you to take care of yourself afterwards. I hope that you have used something that is safeĖ hopefully something that has been disinfected. Iím going to list very basic things you should do if your method of self-harm is cutting.

1) Stop the bleeding. Apply pressure (with a tissue or a cloth) to the cuts to slow it down. Keep holding it there until the bleeding has stopped completely.

2) Run your wounds under warm water. Do not use soap or any other products. Putting your wounds under warm water is going to hurt, by the way.

3) Dry up your wounds and let it air for a little while, applying pressure if the bleeding starts up again.

4) Bandage your wounds snugly.

5) The next day, take off the bandages and rinse it again in warm water. Still, do not use product or soap on it. Just warm water.

6) Air dry it, and then bandage it again.

7) Once you see it starting to heal slightly, you can use antiseptic cream to ward off any infection. I just use normal moisturiser, but thatís your call. Keep it bandaged, and if you donít want it to scar then keep it out of the sunlight. Let it heal.

As a general rule Ė do not put anything on an open wound that you would not put on your eyeball.

And finallyÖ

Do not keep whatever instrument you have used within easy reach. Either throw it away now, or if you feel like you arenít ready for that yet, then hide it in a really inconvenient place. Put it on top of a really high cupboard or on a shelf that you canít reach without a chair, or something. This will work very well in conjunction with urge surfing. You need to create some space between the urge to self-harm and the act of self-harming. One CAN exist without the other, even if in the moment it seems like it canít.

Take care of yourself. You are worth fighting for.

Some links

Here is a little reminder of what you deserve.
http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/...rights-164630/

And if you need a distraction, check out Desiderata by Max Ehrmann.
http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/...hrmann-164629/

The link below is primarily for suicidal feelings but you can also use it for self-harm.
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

As mentioned below, the Samaritans email is,
[email protected]

You can also Google "Samaritans in..." and wherever you live. There will be a phone number.

And lastly, live 24-hour chat with trained volunteers (primarily for suicidal feelings but you can also use it for self-harm)
http://www.newhopenow.org/counseling/liveperson.html
They stress the fact that they are all Christian on there quite a lot. If you are not religious, please don't let that turn you off. I'm not religious but I occasionally use them, and they are totally fine with that. They have worked for me before and they are very direct (in a gentle way) and supportive. They are incredibly useful when you are feeling completely alone and need to connect with another human being. Sometimes it just helps to know that someone out there is reading your thoughts and responding to them with care.

Great post. I have been sober of self harm for almost 2 years now

ďHer mind is an unquiet one, words and thoughts and impulses constantly crashing into each other.Ē


― David Levithan
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post #49 of 110 (permalink) Old 01-11-2014, 10:08 AM
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This posting is very helpful.
Until recently I hadn't even thought of self hurt as something that i would do...again. It got really bad yesterday and I felt like i couldn't take it anymore. The idea of it was tempting and even more so that i got a knife as a gift on that same day. It was like a sign. Being a new user I thought i'd come back to SAS today to see if maybe id find some support of some kind. Sure enough. This definitely has helped me keep away from self hurting. Reading all the suggestions and contracts and ideas.
Thank to all!
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post #50 of 110 (permalink) Old 01-14-2014, 07:04 PM
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I think those were some great posts. Thank you for writing those out for people. I had suffered with bad cutting for around 3 years. One day, during a hospital stay, I finally was fed up with being out of control with it and made the decision to try everything in my power to stop. I had a few slip-ups along the way, but I have it under control now. Even more than that - I have no urges whatsoever. I'm very proud of myself for fighting it. I feel very much for everyone who is currently struggling with self-harm, and I hope that you can find the strength to fight it and use the methods described here.

For me personally, I used red marker on my arms and just went to town with it. I also painted with red paint whenever I felt myself getting lost. It grounded me and made me pay attention to whatever it was I was painting. And it also satisfied my mind's need to see red. The red marker and red paint kinda did a "fake-out" to my mind, giving it that colour soothed me a bit.

My current coping mechanism, for whatever overwhelming emotion I have, is music. And I don't mean calmly listening to it. I mean, when I'm home, I turn it up loud, I stomp around the room if I need to and I just sing my heart out. I just let it all out as much as I can. If I focus on the music, I can get that energy out instead of it turning self-destructive.

Everyone is gonna have their own unique way of fighting it. Nobody give up if one thing doesn't help, there are so many techniques and ways to help.
Thank you so much that is a brilliant idea! I've been fighting self-harm urges for over a year, and this is truly going to help me. And thank you to everyone else who posted strategies on this thread! I'm going to be stronger this time, I know it.
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post #51 of 110 (permalink) Old 05-09-2014, 09:31 AM
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I still don't understand why it is bad to cut or burn yourself if you're not crippling yourself. i can comeback from a cut or burning myself with a liter. People may not like it, but I for one like the pain. It's what I live for anymore.

"I know not all that may be coming, but be what it will, I'll go to it laughing." Stubb, Moby Dick
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post #52 of 110 (permalink) Old 05-18-2014, 11:20 PM
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i like the fine point sharpie because it tingles like a sharp object. not always happy to have it on my arm for a few days though.
have to say though, my last cut was with a broken wineglass and it was a lot deeper than my other four. the scar is highly noticeable, maybe because it's not that old, but i look at it and it makes me sad, not quite ashamed, but just sad, and i don't want to do it again.

PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!
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post #53 of 110 (permalink) Old 05-21-2014, 08:00 PM
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Thank you so much. <3
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post #54 of 110 (permalink) Old 05-21-2014, 08:02 PM
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post #55 of 110 (permalink) Old 07-24-2014, 12:18 PM
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This is really good advice!! I wish I had seen this when I needed it the most. I'm now so much better but I always find that if you get the relapse feeling, get a liquid eyeliner pen and draw cute tatoos on where you would cut.

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post #56 of 110 (permalink) Old 07-24-2014, 12:19 PM
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I really hope you are alright now

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post #57 of 110 (permalink) Old 07-28-2014, 02:50 AM
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I was having a really bad day a few weeks ago and called the mental hospital crisis team and they came to my apt. with at least 10 cops when I told them I just needed to talk.
Oh dear god, that reminds me of some awful times >.<

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post #58 of 110 (permalink) Old 08-06-2014, 03:08 PM
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Yeah, this is really good. I haven't really ever entirely considered self harm, but I really appreciate your post, and I feel like it may help me through my general depression phases.

Thanks.

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post #59 of 110 (permalink) Old 08-13-2014, 12:38 AM
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imageuploadedbytapatalk1407915487.871960.jpgThese. I love the way they burn my lungs. I smoke a pack a day, I'll admit it's an awful habit but it's better than actually hurting myself I guess.

"Sometimes the most beautiful people are beautifully broken." ~ Robert M. Drake
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post #60 of 110 (permalink) Old 08-18-2014, 07:50 AM
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Triggering Warning: I know this is triggering but I get lots of suicidal thoughts, I don't try to do anything but sometimes I feel like I'd be better off dead sometimes. I've only self harmed once in my entire life and I don't think I'd ever do it again but sometimes I feel like I'm close to self harming sometimes. It's the loneliness that gets to me the most I think. That and my low self esteem, I hate feeling worthless and sorry for myself so much.

"Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it." ~Tori Amos
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