How Do You Cope With A Normal Stress Life If You Have an Anxiety Disorder? - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-05-2019, 09:39 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by truant View Post
I think the problem wrt to stress is that some people need more support than they're given. And the justification for not giving that support is the assumption that everyone has to handle around the same amount of stress. Invisible stressors related to mental health conditions are essentially ignored. So if you're not handling your stress, the theory is that you just need to learn a few fancy techniques to get your life back on track.

So all the focus in the MH industry is on pushing people to be self-sufficient. But what if some people do actually have more problems than they can individually handle, no matter what they do? Then all the techniques in the world won't save them in the end, and the necessity of learning all those techniques just becomes another burden on them.

CBT, exposure, mindfulness, diet, exercise, even medication all "work" in the sense that you can derive benefit from them. And for people with manageable problems, that may be all they need. But they may not be enough for people facing serious challenges. If someone's being eaten by a bear, you don't tell them to be mindful and use CBT to reframe the pain of being eaten alive -- you kill the ****ing bear for them. Right now, there are millions of people being eaten by the bears of mental illness, poverty, and other problems and they're being told, basically, to just try harder to fight the bear.

This is a societal problem that everyone expects individuals to solve on their own.

Speaking in regard to the mental health part.....that is something that I think of a lot too - What if a person has too many problems to be able to cope with on their own?



But ultimately those problems originate from inside you and only you. It's not coming from an external source. And I think because of that reason, it's plausible to think that one can get it under control. The more problems a person has, the harder it will be.....but since it is self contained, it feels like it is something that can ultimately be controlled because it is you who is controlling the thing that is causing the problems in the first place (the mind). Think of it like a programmer who has written a buggy program that causes a lot of problems.........the programmer can get fed up and just erase it and make something better.
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post #22 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-05-2019, 09:52 PM
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Yeah it takes enormous willpower and courage. It's hard because we need to maintain that energy for our whole life.



I feel like talk therapy can't have any more benefits now because I've been talking to counselors for years and I feel like there's nothing more to talk about......but the talking itself feels good because its just human contact.



Good to know that you're in a better state now than before
If you have talked to counselors already then more talk therapy isn't probably going to help you much. I made this mistake. I thought reading books or researching social anxiety would help. It does a bit but you have to be able to put that knowledge to use in real life. For example you can read all kinds of books to start conversations or talk to women but if you are not actually able to approach them and talk to them that knowledge dosent do you any good. So you just have to go out and do it. (Much, much easier said then done)
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post #23 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-06-2019, 02:31 PM
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it is you who is controlling the thing that is causing the problems in the first place (the mind). Think of it like a programmer who has written a buggy program that causes a lot of problems.........the programmer can get fed up and just erase it and make something better.
humans do not program themselves.
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post #24 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-07-2019, 04:33 PM Thread Starter
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humans do not program themselves.

We do subconsciously......unaware of what we're doing. Counselors let us know what subconscious programming has occurred and how to reverse it.
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post #25 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-07-2019, 09:28 PM
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How do I cope with normal stress in life?


Badly, sir. Very badly.

“Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you.”

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I've got Kitty Pryde
And Nightcrawler, too
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Yes I do, I do


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post #26 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 01:52 PM Thread Starter
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And I never found eating pills with absurd side effects to do anything at all the help my mental health so I long since wrote them off as effective treatment for my issues.

To me its deciding what is worse. The side effects or living with the anxiety.
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post #27 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-11-2019, 02:54 PM
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To me its deciding what is worse. The side effects or living with the anxiety.
That's my point, no pills I tried reduced my anxiety or my depression at all, if they do then you can weigh whether the trade off is fair but if there is no trade off then its a waste of money and a useless addiction
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post #28 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-12-2019, 06:45 AM
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To me its deciding what is worse. The side effects or living with the anxiety.
And doctors are like

"hmm, what can I give you that will marginally improve your life, thus officially implying that I'm doing my job, but not actually making your life sufficiently bearable, such that you'll feel like your life has meaning"
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post #29 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-13-2019, 04:22 PM Thread Starter
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And doctors are like

"hmm, what can I give you that will marginally improve your life, thus officially implying that I'm doing my job, but not actually making your life sufficiently bearable, such that you'll feel like your life has meaning"
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And that's why its important to choose a therapist who's also your friend who likes you back, and not just a walking talking encyclopedia/medicine cabinet.
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post #30 of 30 (permalink) Old 08-14-2019, 01:59 AM
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Yes, we can't do what normal people can. Mental illness is a tough b**ch. The only ones that can have a mild mental illness... it doesn't affect them to a high degree. If I were to try and live a life of a normal person right now, I'd just shoot myself due to the insane chaos that would be triggered.

I also have severe OCD, fortunatly it is greatly controlled when I avoid triggers (in the past OCD was worse and I could not escape it). OCD is debilitating, from what I heard, rarely does medication help it, plus its only a temporary help as medications cause tolerance, and withdrawal once you get off.

I am aware that if I make a dream, it would have to be small. My small dream is to somehow have an income of money to support myself, not to be rich because I get no joy from material things anymore. Even this dream is mostly likely impossible because of my checking OCD and pure-O OCD. It would have to be an income that requires very little contributions and effort from myself, because effort gives me obsessions and compulsions.
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