Help identifying "disorder" - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-06-2020, 11:26 PM Thread Starter
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Help identifying "disorder"


Hi everyone,

First post in the forum

I've been searching many websites with information about the different types of anxiety, as well as many forums, including this one, but surprisingly I couldn't find information about how can my anxiety situation can be classified.

If someone you don't know publicly menaces you with violence, you manage to escape from that person but then you get constant fear and anxiety that the person is very probably a very violent person and might come to get you at your residence to arm you and/or your family members, how do you classify this anxiety?

As most anxiety disorders that I found listed in the internet, this one is not from a subjective cause. It is from an objective cause. The menace is real, there are good chances it may come true, but the anxiety caused by it is as unbearable as other types of anxieties. It has been 3 days without sleeping, it's hard to breath (has if I have a knot in my throat), don't have any appetite, can't think of ay other thing besides this.

The situation:

3 days ago I had an unfortunate situation in road traffic. Another driver bullied me for not enough reason. He wanted to overtake me and I didn't notice so I didn't make it easier for him and so he reacted with aggressive honking and violent gesture.

Unfortunately my instinct reaction was replying with the same manners (which I so much regret right now) and he got extremely upset and pursuit me for about 5 minutes, honking and demanding with violent gestures that I stoped in the side of the road.

At some point he managed to overtake me and almost forced me out of the road. Luckily at this point I managed to turn to another road and lost him.

But it all happened close to my residence (within a 10km range) and the guy is probably also a resident of the same region. To worsen up the case in our country anyone has free access to name and address of any other car owner just with the license plate.

I'm almost sure that he is violent and emotionally not in balance. And I fear that he has not given up after I escaped from him. I get the sensation that he will look for revenge, wether if he finds me one day again on the road or, worse, if he knows that he can get information about my name and address and comes to get me at home.

Even worse, I live with my wife and our 3 small children and that what gets me even more stressed out, as he might decide to arm them also.

I'm in a lot of anxiety, I don't see an end to this and I don't know which type of anxiety it is nor a name for it.

Any information, help or advice would be great. Thanks!

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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-07-2020, 04:51 AM
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Sounds like a response to a specific event rather than a disorder per se.

Keep an eye on it. If it does not get better within a 2 - 3 week period you should consult a professional for just a handful of sessions.
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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-07-2020, 05:57 AM Thread Starter
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Hi Lisa,

Thanks for your reply. It is very much appreciated.

Yes, exactly, that's why I used the word "disorder" between inverted commas in the title.

I always had a few issues with anxiety but never significant enough to be a real problem. 99% of the time I dealt well with it and never even had to medicate or seek for assistance. And almost always anxiety came with a true reason (specific events, as you mention) just for a few time. Then I would have months/years of anxiety "freedom".

So I also think I might not have a specific disorder, although very probably most people would deal with this specific event much better than I'm dealing with it. Today I woke up really miserable, very anxious. And since this happened I'm having difficulty breeding properly. I don't have appetite, already lost 3kg (in 3 days). It's very hard to sleep, I only get discomfortable dreams, they are not scary but they don't allow me to rest well.

You see, although I know that there are few chances that the guy is coming after me/us (maybe 5-10% chances), it's hard for me to deal with it. Especially because I don't live alone. It's my wife and our 3 daughters, a 8 year old one and two wonderful twin girls with 18 months... Just the possibility of having them in danger for my actions, breaks my heart and makes it really hard to just forget about what happened and move on.

Hopefully nothing bad happens and time will heal my stressed mind...

Thanks again.

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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-07-2020, 05:59 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa View Post
Sounds like a response to a specific event rather than a disorder per se.

Keep an eye on it. If it does not get better within a 2 - 3 week period you should consult a professional for just a handful of sessions.
Oh... and by the way, if this persists and I have to consult a professional, which professional should it be? A psychiatrist? Psychologist? Or?

Thanks again and sorry for the double post.

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post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-07-2020, 06:13 AM
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It sounds like you may have some underlying anxiety issues. It's not relevant on most days but if something happens it suddenly causes a big reaction.

If it persists then see a psychologist, I would say. Psychiatrists often simply prescribe medication. Instead, you may just need to have a few talking sessions to think differently about that incident. That in turn should alleviate the anxiety. That's essentially what psychologists do

In the mean time, you should talk to friends and family about that incident. Maybe not particularly your wife but other men. Talking to friends with a similar outlook on life often makes a difference in how people think about situations. That may already fix the issue.
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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-07-2020, 06:18 AM
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Oh, and here is one thing I can think of right now....

You say that you feel bad that your family may be in danger because of your actions. But was it really what you did? Did you do anything out of the ordinary? Or was everything as always and you came across someone else's actions? If it wasn't you that caused that incident then do you have to feel bad about your actions?

There are lots of people with good takes on this board. Hopefully some will post their takes in this thread as well.
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 09-08-2020, 12:02 AM Thread Starter
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Hi again and thank you both!

Lisa: About your questions, in fact I was peacefully going on my normal day life and someone provoked me. But unfortunately I reacted and also provoked him. So if I just ignored him (which is what I should have done), nothing else would have happened. That's why I kind of blame myself.

LostWords: Today is the 4th day since it happened and this last night I could sleep a bit better. Also the first hours of the day I'm feeling less anxious than in the previous days. I think and hope that little by little I will improve on the anxiety. I'm just not so sure if I can forget about the issue. But well, as long as I can get a bit better as time goes by, it may come to a point when I get back to normality.

After all I don't fear casually and unexpectedly meeting the guy one day and that he recognises me / my car. That would actually get me a chance of clarifying things, hopefully in a non-violent way. The real issue, as I posted in my first post is that in the country where I live everyone has free access to name and compete address of the owner of every car through the license plate.

And if he was angry enough to find where I live it would most likely happen in the next days after the situation occurred. So, when 1, 2, 3 weeks pass, it will be less probable to happen and so I think I might improve my state.

Thanks again. I may use this thread again to update the situation.

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