Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Milan, Italy
Language: Italian, English
Do you also have OCD?
I'm not sure if a similar thread has already been opened in this section of the forum but I haven't found any recent one so i thought about opening one.
I am pretty sure that anxiety (any form of it) has a common co-morbidity with OCD but I don't know much about the data and the research about this topic.
During my last session with my psychiatrist I decided to mention for the first time that I seem to engage in OCD tendencies. I have been in treatment with him for 6 months and never mentioned that before because the main problem I sought help for actually resulted in a diagnosis for somatization anxiety, so OCD was never my first concern and my primary symptoms have not disappeared yet. However I find myself doing things that sound crazy and I am a little concerned about them. I am not concerned about the things that I do themselves but rather about the obsessive side of my personality that they show. And about the possible complications of my other disorder.
I will give a few examples of things that I think and do just to see if there's someone who can relate to that. My compulsions and obsessions are not related to cleanliness but rather to tidiness and neatness. So I don't have any of the behaviours that many people have when they will wash their hands 20 times a day or clean their house obsessively.
1. Things always have to be in a specific position or order, for example I keep my medications on my night table in a specific order (amisulpride-trazodone-zolpidem tartrate from bottom to top next to my daytime anxiety pills), I need to use always the same plastic cup that I keep to take my sleeping drops and can't use a random glass from the kitchen for that. I always take my medications in the same order (from bottom to top as they're arranged on the night table).
2. When my boyfriend comes I won't allow him to leave his shoes or his suitcase around. I will put his suitcase always in the same place in front of my wardrobe and when he tried to move it to his side of the bed I complained that I didn't like it and moved it back. Everytime he takes his shoes off even if I'm tired after a long walk I will summon up the strength to place them in front of the suitcase, facing the window. They always have to face the window. I will also always put his laptop case perfectly on top of his suitcase and will take his clothes and fold them and put them back in the suitcase whenever he takes them off. Same things goes for electronic devices - he just leaves his wires hanging around, I wrap them up and neatly put them on top of his computer always at the same corner of my desk.
3. I am obsessed by the sound of my electric fan heater. During the winter I can't sleep without having it on (I try not to do this because it's expensive and wastes a lot of energy) and I can't let it go even when it starts to get warmer so I sweat in my sleep. Same thing happens during the summer with my fan - I keep sleeping with it even when it gets colder because I'm addicted to the sound of it and it helps me fall asleep.
4. The items I have on my desk have been arranged in the same way for years (from left to right - pen holder, water bottle, glass) I have a specific glass that is always in my room and I only drink from that one.
All these behaviours are mildly time consuming and generally not harmful which is why I never thought I had OCD but I'm starting to realize that it's not normal to HAVE TO DO things in a certain way. It's ok to have habits but it's not ok if you can't do them in any other way. I've never tried to challenge my OCD tendencies by doing things differently and I do very poorly when I'm a new environment and normally try to establish a routine there as well - for example, when I go and sleep at my boyfriend's place for a few weeks at a time I need to bring my own soap, because I don't like how other feels against my face, I will find a specific place to put my medications and always leave them there, I will arrange the bed always in the same way etc... I know nothing would happen if I did things in a different way but I DO NOT WANT to do them in any different way. I can't push myself to try and do them in a different way. The most harm this does to me is that it gives me a lot of stress because I know this is not a way to be.
However, I am very scared about addressing my OCD issues because I was previously prescribed Prozac as an antidepressant which was also recommended for OCD and I had terrible side effects so I wish to never take similar medications again. How should I go about it with my doctor?
Do you have OCD-like tendencies too (or a full diagnosis) and what is it like for you?
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