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-   -   Compulsive buying disorder (https://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f33/compulsive-buying-disorder-119226/)

ErichFranz 03-22-2011 12:27 PM

Compulsive buying disorder
 
Anyone else think they might have this? I haven't been formally diagnosed or anything (don't know how they would do that anyway.) But I'm seriously addicted to buying things. Things I don't need. Mostly books, DVDs, and video games. But mostly books. It doesn't help that I have a debit card and am always online. I can buys things with the click of a button. And since I can find things that are used I always think I'm getting a great deal. I've only watched maybe half of the DVDs I own and have read probably less than 5% of the books I own. But I keep buying more and more and adding them to the pile.

I never pay much more than 10 dollars for a book, unless it's a book I really want and can't find anywhere else. Most of the books I buy are usually around 5 dollars or less. I think "oh, it's just a couple dollars, whats the big deal?" But I've bought so many that the price must have really added up. I'm guessing I've sent literally thousands of dollars on frivolous items that I don't need.

I keep telling myself that once I get a job, I'll make the money back, but still, no job yet.

I've subscribed to like 5 or 6 magazines in the past few days. I can't even keep track.

I'm seriously going to Goodwill right after I write this thread. It's the perfect store for me. Tons of cheap junk, electronics, and books.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

lionlioncatcat 03-22-2011 01:24 PM

I dont really know much about this, So im talking purely from opinion. I think a large part of why you (i have been known to aswell) buy stuff is as an attempt to fill a holl of sorts. A hunger for something new, a change really. Of course, a new something will only satisfy this hunger for a bit, and its an expensive hobby.

Id try looking at other ways feel happy that are less expensive and more sustainable. I dont know about you, but for me, when im feeling like that. The most appealing thing in the world is a large sporadic change, doing something entirely out of my normal routine. I dont tell anyone, and afterwards i act like it never happened, but a few times Ive just been to random places and spent a few hours there. variety is the spice of life, right ?

Good luck.

Lion

ErichFranz 03-22-2011 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lionlioncatcat (Post 1058890417)
I dont know about you, but for me, when im feeling like that. The most appealing thing in the world is a large sporadic change, doing something entirely out of my normal routine. I dont tell anyone, and afterwards i act like it never happened, but a few times Ive just been to random places and spent a few hours there. variety is the spice of life, right ?

Good luck.

Lion

I think you're right. I think buying things is an attempt to fill a hole. And I will consider your advice. Although I have no idea what kind of sporadic activities I should do. Any ideas?

lionlioncatcat 03-22-2011 05:10 PM

I quite like visiting places ive never been before, catching 5 trains to go have coffee a hundred miles away. Sometimes i go to the hills near me and just kind of watch things. Sometimes i go cycling until im so tired i can do nothing but sleep.

Whatever takes your fancy really, find somewhere interesting on the internet and go there. Good luck :).

ErichFranz 03-22-2011 05:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lionlioncatcat (Post 1058890978)
I quite like visiting places ive never been before, catching 5 trains to go have coffee a hundred miles away. Sometimes i go to the hills near me and just kind of watch things. Sometimes i go cycling until im so tired i can do nothing but sleep.

Whatever takes your fancy really, find somewhere interesting on the internet and go there. Good luck :).

Thank you for the advice. And best of luck on your future adventures.

Chelllliiee 03-22-2011 11:31 PM

I've been through something like this. It was pretty bad before. I couldn't walk into any store without wanting to pick SOMETHING up. I could have walked into a store that sold nothing that interested me but I would make it a point to find something to buy. It was bad. I've gotten better since then and although I sometimes still have an inner battle with myself whenever I see cute clothes or something, I'm able to control it better than before. The shopping disorder is still there and I'm still a shopaholic, but I'd say it's pretty mild now. I had no choice but to get it under control when it got to the point where I had no money left to spend, haha.

ErichFranz 03-24-2011 03:34 PM

so what did you do to stop buying things? besides running out of money?

Chelllliiee 03-24-2011 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ErichFranz (Post 1058895061)
so what did you do to stop buying things? besides running out of money?

Well, I got married and my husband is the only one who works, so all of our money is technically his and he holds onto it tight, so he doesn't allow me to spend frivolously. Actually, I probably only shop once every six months or so and just for a couple t-shirts or something, because that's all I'm allowed. Since I was forced to limit what I could and could not spend, I had no choice but to learn to control my spending better. I still don't work so I still completely rely on my husband for financial support, but if I started working again and I had my own money available for me to spend, I'm pretty confident that I would probably be able to control my spending/shopping urges a lot better than I used to be able to; and it's because I've had to live with my husband's limitations for a long time. His limitations conditioned me.

Redgemini 04-04-2012 03:58 AM

I need serious help!! :(
 
Reading some of your comments above is reassuring to know there are other people in my situation. But my addiction is spiralling out of control to the point where I'm getting into debt to fund my addiction. The only time I can stop myself from buying is to stay indoors and never go out which I can't do. I'm a single mother at Uni and I feel the pressure to look good because I don't have many friends. I've suffered with depression, drug addiction in the past and it's like I've replaced one addiction for another. I will literally buy anything if it looks good and I'll justify my reasons for buying it but it's mainly with clothes. I buy dvds, makeup, shoes/trainers, handbags, nail varnishes, perfumes, Yankee candles, expensive underwear and other household items as well as spoiling my child. Even going food shopping turns out to be a shopping spree buying way too much food and I'm not a big eater as it is so alot of it gets wasted 9/10 but as I said its getting worse and I don't know why but it's worrying me because I can't actually help it. Some might think I'm stupid and I should pull myself together, get a grip an all that but i wish it was that easy. I'm very troubled emotionally in my life an I know that it's obviously something to do with it but I could really do with some help!!! :roll

OldSchoolSkater 04-04-2012 07:06 AM

I think I have some of this as well.

I just like to own things sometimes. It makes me feel good to get stuff in the mail and to just know I have it I guess. It happens when I'm bored or lonely or sad, then I start looking at ebay, etc and find something for me to buy.

I've been doing better with this, and even ended up selling some of my crap on ebay in order to clear out some of what I consider to be junk (just stuff I don't use, trying to simplify my life).

All I can say is maybe if you use these things you wont feel as bad, and maybe put a spending limit on it. Another option is to resell the stuff you don't want on ebay and get some of the money back - that is, if the amount of stuff you have is bothering you like it was me.

Good luck

Redgemini 04-04-2012 05:50 PM

Compulsive buying disorder
 
I've tried selling on eBay thinking somehow that it justifies my spending because I'm making money back and in turn I'm making room for more stuff so it's like a vicious cycle that I can't get out of. I've even resorted to dishonest measures just so I can maintain my addiction which I have now learnt from. I didn't particularly realise I had a problem until yesterday when I spent about 300 on clothes and toys for my child. Obviously I know children can be expensive but I went overboard and it wasn't until after I opened everything and put it away that the guilt then began to set in and the reality of my finances being in such a mess hit me. I really don't know what to do to stop this before it gets even more out of hand. I'm even lying to people about my spending because anyone who knows me, knows I can't afford the life I'm currently living but they don't understand that there's a more deeper routed issue than just taking abit of retail therapy a little too far. I'm acting like an addict by lying and stealing. With all addicts though, admitting to yourself that you have a problem is the first step but now what do I do to combat it???


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