Agoraphobia

I would like to start a thread to talk with people who also have agoraphobia. I am housebound except for appointments, where a "safe person" I think in my mind, will be meeting me, such as my psychiatrist or therapist. I can leave the apartment with my husband otherwise. Otherwise, I am housebound a lot of the time. What is your experience?

I had this for awhile it was very rough. I slowly ventured out and was able to overcome it.

I haven't been diagnosed with agoraphobia, but I think people are dangerous and avoid them whenever possible. It takes me a long time to figure out whether or not a person or location is "safe", and I generally won't feel comfortable around them/there until I know they are safe. Tbh, I can't think of anyone who falls into that category atm, other than my therapist. Who I only talk to on the phone. I can use my grocery store okay because I've been going there for almost 20 years. I can use the Tim Hortons near my house and the public library but I get really anxious when I'm in those places and leave as quickly as I can. I avoid going anywhere else. I don't even really feel safe with my parents or being at their house.

So I can leave the house, but the more people there are, the less familiar a location is, and the harder it is for me to leave a situation, the more afraid that I am. So I walk everywhere instead of taking the buses (which give me borderline panic attacks), and when I do walk I prefer to keep my distance from other people. I don't use public restrooms (too easy to trap someone), and I avoid crowds like the plague. A music concert is my idea of hell on earth.

I find a lot of things all but impossible without a support person (or as I like to call them, a "bodyguard"), like going to support groups or meetups. I don't know how anyone manages to do things like that. When I was in a relationship I was able to do a lot more than I can now because I had someone with me. I don't have anyone like that in my life now, though, and I don't expect to ever find anyone like that again so I think I'm just screwed. My therapist suggested a support animal, but I can't afford veterinary bills. And I'm scared of dogs, too.

I can't work, because I'm too afraid, I don't make enough money from my writing to pay my bills, and I don't qualify for disability, so when I lose my house, I guess I'll just end up homeless.