Originally Posted by EarthDominator
I won't get to move out. When I go to work, which is in the summer of 2019, I'm required to support my mother with the money I earn, and pay my brother's study. And trust me, studying is not a cheap business. So I will have too few of money left to even do anything with it. By the time my brother has completed his study it will be 2026. I will not be waiting that long to finally move out, without having the chance to make friends anywhere. And, it's a nice thought, but sadly for me that has never happened nor will it ever happen.
As I said I'll just have to wait till early 2019, then I'll take my exit out of this world. Or better said, out of my house. And to be honest, who wants to be friends with me outside of SAS? I mean come on, I look like a monster, I'm not interesting. People have can get more out of a stone than out of me.
I've only had downs so far, and that still continues. I just want to get out of my own situation before it gets even worse. Practically speaking, I'm saving myself from an even more horrible life that is closing in.
"Think positive." Heard that a few thousand times now. Not only from you, or even here from SAS. But if I would be able to think positive, I would've done so. But I can't for any reason. And I rather die than live my life inside of a prison for years to come.
It's very hard to not get affected by your problems if you got nothing good happening in your entire life. Everything I do always ends up in something bad, be it a test for school or a small talk with a stranger. And I got nothing to enjoy, everything I do is a task for me. Waking up, getting out of bed, going to school etc. I can handle much, but I got my limits.
Only thing I can do to 'improve' things is to end it. Not really improving, but I see it more as a change.
why? Ditch those *******s. If i had a family that abused me so mcuh like that, i would completely disown them and i would view them as enemies. If they were dangling from a cliff and the emergency sevices were 5 mins away i wouldnt do ****. Dont bend over backwards for people who are bad, scree them, forget them. Just act nice etc and suck away their money and food and stuff until you can move out then cut them off. Seriously man they ruined your life and treated you like crap and now you are gonna support them? Even if they do have some good points then dont support them, you cant ruin your life just to help others. You deserve to have a good life of freedom and independance, you dont deserve to have to support those people who bullied you. What good did they do to you anyway? Just cause they had you and supported you doesnt mean that you owe them a debt, they are horrible people and they treated you badly and you deserve to live a life instead of being their slave, so cut them off as soon as you can and start a new life. Find a girlfriend and some friends and hobbies/passions, get promoted to have more money to travel and eat out etc, live life. Thats my advice.
You shouldnt kill yourself man. Anyone would want to be your friend, i'd want to be your friend, many people would want to. Ther is a big world out there full of akmost 8 billion people. You just need to find the right ones. But see thats what many people in this world are like, they want from you, they want to get things out of you, to the point of making you feel worthless. Dont let them. If you are as useless as a stone to someone then good, **** that person. Just find people who are good people and then you will have people to care about, quit trying to satisfy a bunch of selfish shallow scumbags who want to take things from you.
I'm sure you've had some good points, i mean you can walk and see etc, those are good points right? You may have it pretty bad but at least you arent crippled or blind. I find that cherishing the good things i have really helps me. No you have a good life ahead of you, a life of living on your own far away from anyone who treated you badly, a life of happiness and freedom and peace and excitement and adventure and wonderful people! You just need to try your best to make your life into a good life and you need to not let your emotions control you. Your emotions shouldnt affect you negatively.
Trust me i used to hate people who told me to think positively but its true. Why think negatively? We can still be aware of our problems at the same time of simply not letting them affect us emotionally. Trust me i have all the problems in the world, 19 wasted years, 4 mental disorders, bored all day every day etc, but im happy as can be(most of the time anyway). Its all about perspective and mindset. You wont have to live inside a prison. According to law, when you are 18 you can do whatever you want and no one can tell you what to do. So get a job, save up money, and then move out when you are 18 and try not to look back on your past. You arent anyones slave, you are your own boss, the god of your own world, you get to make your life into what you want it to be, not some evil losers that want to take everything away from you.
Yeah it is hard to not let problems affect us emotionally, it took me like a year to fully get the hang of it, but it is possible. Emotions are just emotions. Life is life, problems are problems, people are people, etc. It is how it is. So just relax and learn to let go of negative things, anything that makes you feel bad, let go of it. Learn to flow with life instead of worrying and stressing and trying to be in control of life, life is impossible to control, life is overwhelming and insane, we can only live one day at a time. There is plenty to enjoy, exploring and experiencing the world, searching for people like you, making friends and getting into a relationship/s, getting laid, alcohol(etc), hobbies, sports, thrill sports, travel, eating out, living on your own, living with others, etc. Who knows, maybe some day you'll have a family and you'll be taking them out to awesome places and stuff, you have many decades of life ahead of you! Things are mundane and boring now but they will change. Trust me my life is so boring too, i just browse sas all day most of the time. But things are changing, things change. You have to make your limits further then, countless times i felt like i was pushed past my limits and i almost gave up but i didnt and then i eventually adjusted to it and started feeling better about life. It makes you into a stronger person, it toughens you up.
No you can improve a lot. You can live on your own, you just need to go to work every day which is like school really, come back and do whatever you want and live independantly or hang out with any people you might have, etc. You can improve your limits and become a stronger person, etc. There is so much to improve in!
you can live far away from your family, you can some day 20 years from now be waking up every day looking back on 15 years of marriage or something, anything can happen! Dont give up man!