Originally Posted by Triste Golem
I use the master ninja techniques...i hide in the shadows
When a negative thought comes into my mind, I immediately stop it with an internal "NO!" I then rethink the situation by doing the following:
* Describe the situation. Describe the fear or anger...
* Listen to each of my internal voices about the situation: the playful child, the fearful child, the nurturing parent, and the critical parent. A description of each of these individual:
Playful child: The side of you that wants to have fun.
Fearful child: The side of you that is scared of certain situations or the unknown.
Nurturing Parent: The side of you that forgives yourself in most-all situations.
Critical Parent: The side of you that expects results.
* Then let my adult rationally decide what I should do from the internal discussion.
The adult is your decision maker. He/She is the one that will carefully listen to all your internal arguments and can best make a decision rationally.
Sometimes, one of your internal voices will over-control the situation and it's up to your adult to balance the discussion. I know this sounds like a lot to do in certain situations but with practice it gets easier and easier...
This was part of my therapy and it had helped me. Personally, it's mostly a struggle with my critical parent cuz I have these unfair expectations of myself.