the common denominator of my fears
is the total loss of control of the situation.
If i have an answer, if i know what action to take, then i'm usually okay.
The most horrible situations are the ones where you find no way of dealing with your surroundings.
It's always the same questions: "what if this happens, what if that happens, what if people ridicule me, what if people are aggressive and impatient towards me, what if he/she rejects me, what if i'm asked something i don't know the answer to, what if we have to go out to a bar/club, what if the teacher asks everyone to introduce themselves, etc etc etc"
What they all have in common is that you have no good or even acceptable ways of dealing with the situations, so it will always be a negative experience.
Those sickening situations where you are like a deer in the headlights, not only are those situations horrible to be in, they are horrible to even think about.So you avoid every situation where they can possibly occur.
So what can you do?
You can only try to be as prepared as possible, to think out possible scenarios beforehand, think about things that might occur and how you are going to deal with them.
Then you have to "psyche" yourself up, you have to find the right state of mind to go into the situations, you have to be "loose", you have to be a little CRAZY.
Because if you're alread half frozen with fear going into the situation you will most likely fail.
i dunno man...who knows...ya know??