Stupid job interview!!... plus drinking to cope - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-12-2006, 07:28 PM Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
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Stupid job interview!!... plus drinking to cope


First of all, hey everyone. haven't been here in a while. I dont come here because I choose not to admit that I have some SA... but it's not too bad.

I think SA is part of my personality, so it's not really SA. I don't thrive off of other people's energys. I'm an introvert, and thats okay too I guess. I enjoy talking to people I get along with, etc. And I suppose I enjoy meeting people. I'm just not that in your face remember my face personality type, which I sometimes wish I was.

Anyway I went for my second job interview this month. it sucked. I had an interview at walmart... (im 17, so, its just a job for now). they ask you so many stupid questions like "why do you want to work for walmart?", "how could walmart improve?", "describe a time in the past where you helped a customer and felt proud?".

its like all retorical questions. there were no answers. I just made up some jumble, that would technically be considered a correct answer, just like someone running for Miss America saying they want world peace.

I feel like I'm talking but it's not really being heard. I try so hard not to mumble, but I swear my mouth must be disconfigured or something because it's hard for me to pronounce certain words or something, I don't know what it is. I have trouble projecting a smart, educated manner of speaking. I have honours in school, and I'm very smart, and I find people never get to see that because my speech isn't up to parr, and I don't know why it is.

My voice was so montone the whole time, and I feel my mouth freeze up when I'm talking. It's not so much that I'm that nervous, it's just I wanted to show personality so much, and I feel like there is no personality to show, even if I didn't have SA. That's why I feel like SA is me, so it's not really SA. I'm just a naturally quiet person with not much to say.

Of course there are people I am more open around, but we all show different personalities to different people, depending on which side of us that person brings out.

the interview just sucked and i feel like it's impossible to get a job. plus there is always that issue when i do get the job how nervous i would be at cash, scared someone might try to make convo with me. I used to work at a drive through at a fast food place, it sucked. I would get anxious and nervous every time some hot guy would order something. I felt like a loser. maybe that was just my job that made me feel like a loser, lol.

Does anyone have any advice?? my interview skills are severly impacting my life because I can't get a job. I have seriously debated drinking before a few interviews to loosen me up. that's what im doing next time. drinking makes me the life of the party.

OMG oh yeah. I went to my friends house last weekend and left my purse there. now granted he's not a good friend or anything, but I had to do that hair of the dog thing, and drink some whisky just to get the nerve to call and ask for my purse back. what the hell! lmao. im a loseeer.

im always debating whether or not to drink before a situation where i might be anxious. it sucks. thats why i love alcohol
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-12-2006, 11:21 PM
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
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Drinkinig will just lead to more problems, and those problems will lead to more problems and so on.
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-13-2006, 02:01 AM
nardil user since 2006
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: S. Cali
Age: 40
Posts: 339
have u tried medication?? everyone reacts differently to which drugs helps em. i was on several SSRI which didnt' work at all until i tried nardil which is a miracle drug for me

"HOPE DIES LAST"
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-13-2006, 12:01 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: WA
Age: 44
Posts: 750
My Mood: Bored
The first step might be to admit that you have a problem? From your description of your behavior, it sounds very much to me like you do, in fact, have issues with with socializing. If you want to come to terms with your social anxiety by saying that it's just "you", that's fine. I resigned myself to the fact that I'd probably be dealing with mine for the rest of my life and that, therefore, it was a part of who I am. But trying to absorb the problem as part of your personality and not defining it as an actual AFFLICTION isn't going to make it go away.

And there's the rub; you recognized that you're behaviing abnormally, that your behavior affects your ability to get a job and that masking the problem with alcohol is required to be a social extrovert. Please take my advice when I tell you that self-medicating like this is NOT healthy. I spent a decade of my life drinking myself into oblivion so that I could be "the life of the party". It turned into a real problem and only perpetuated my existing anxiety. And it wasn't long before I was told by many an honest individual that being "the life of the party" usually means that you're the one acting like a complete fool and making everyone laugh at you as a result.

So my advice is, before you decide to start using alcohol as a means to overcome your anxieties, seek professional help and try to learn how to understand and cope with them. Medication(prescribed, not drunk) may be an option. Or you might be able to overcome your issues with regular therapy sessions. But, honestly, can you tell me with a straight face that you don't have SA, that you're just a naturally shy person and that it's normal to require taking a few shots before you socialize with anyone?
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-15-2006, 10:10 AM
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 35
I think the other people have given you good advice...
regarding the topic of looking for a job, maybe you can get a job that doesn't require as much socialization or pressure..
I know that baggining groceries is somewhat of a social job, but it seems like there wouldn't be as much pressure in that job compared to being a cashier. I don't really know, though, because I've never done either.
I don't know why I'm trying to give advice when I don't even know what I'm talking about...hahaha.
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