SA sucks. Work sucks. Life sucks.
So I only get like 1 freaking day for the whole week at work. Alright, never mind. But I found out I still had to do the same freaking duties when people who worked for 1 week to 2 weeks gets to try out others. I have been working for a few months and yet I am still the same ol' place.
I actually had a panic attack twice during my stay there and also, I get the gitters and talking to customers always gave me a frown and I felt breatheless.
Well, I changed and I can say I am doing fine and did things fast. But it doesn't change their first impression of me and I actually sulk and did things slowly on purpose. I know I am in the wrong but it really hits me hard. I actually had a small quarrel today with a newbie and a person in charge treated me like as though I am still new. I felt as though this was the first day at work.
I felt like crap and at the back of my mind, I kept blaming my SA and how close-minded these people are. People at my work are also always making mistakes but they seem to be able to let them try out new duties. But me? Their impression of me is forever this way. Maybe in their minds, they are thinking 'hey, I didn't fire you is good enough already' Erms ya, thank you very much. Thank you for keeping me and letting me suffer emotionally.
I suddenly wishes to resign but I really don't know. I needed something on my resume but at the same time, I am tired of being treated like second-class citizen and being look over as I can't do this and that just because of their first impression of me. What's more it's embarrassing to tell others I didn't did those during my stay there and it makes me seem as though I am not of help at all.
Really, it really seems like high school all over again.
Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It's getting hard to be someone
But it all works out
It doesn't matter much to me
Let me take you down
'Cause i'm going to strawberry fields...