public speaking?? thoughts? advice? reaffirmations? - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-07-2019, 10:29 PM Thread Starter
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public speaking?? thoughts? advice? reaffirmations?


I'm supposed to take a public speaking class next semester and I'm already so anxious just thinking about it. I told my disability center adviser about it but she hasn't responded yet. I think it might be possible to substitute the course for a different communications course but I don't know if that's a good idea plus it's a long tedious process. If I do take it, I'm hoping to figure out some sort of plan with my teacher and adviser to make the class more manageable. I feel like I should take it so i can work on my public speaking. but i also feel like the class is just gonna be cruel and unusual punishment. and i don't want it to hurt my gpa!

I told my friend this and she was like "you can't just take the class?" and i said no and she asked why not and i said "because i have social anxiety lol" like i'd literally just fail if i tried to take it without any support and she said "isn't that kinda the point?" Like no???? right?? i dont think public speaking classes are made to cure people with social anxiety like maybe it'll help people be less nervous about public speaking but it's also gonna be grading us on our public speaking and i'm gonna be at a major disadvantage

I kinda regret mentioning it to her now i feel so invalidated UGH i thought she'd be more understanding but i feel like she thinks ~everybody gets nervous sometimes with public speaking or social situations~ but i'm not everybody my brain is literally sick and diagnosed and this is a serious issue with a huge impact on my life and she's acting like im just being dramatic and should "just take the class" like everybody else

idk what should i do about this class and is it gonna help me or just stress me out and like am i thinking clearly? is my friend right that im just being extra?
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-07-2019, 10:30 PM Thread Starter
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also for reference, my major is human development and family science, i wanna go into social services probably working with women and children possibly at a homeless shelter or a juvy center or something with foster kids. so it's not like i'm gonna be making speeches all the time!
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-08-2019, 11:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mariaaa View Post
is my friend right that im just being extra?
Well, that's sort of the difference between normal anxiety ("everybody gets nervous") and an anxiety disorder. You know you should 'just take the class', because it's in your best interest to do so, but despite knowing that, you can't seem to force yourself to do it. You get diagnosed with SAD when your anxiety causes you to act in ways that are damaging to your well-being.

A normal person may be anxious about taking the class, but at the end of the day they want the credit more than they want to avoid taking the class. A SAD person may want the credit, but at the end of the day, they want to avoid the class more than they want the credit, even though not taking the class might have terrible drawbacks.

Therapists are there to provide additional support for a person with SAD so they can do things that other people can do without that support. (That's how it's supposed to work, anyway.)

Edit: Fun fact, I won an award for public speaking when I was younger. And I was a drama nerd in hs. I performed in front of the school a bunch of times. I was never really that nervous about it. But my anxiety didn't start until toward the end of hs. I'm not a lifer like most of the people here.

I don't really have any advice, because if forum advice worked, I'd have a job already instead of worrying about being homeless.

For forty-seven years I've put up with it now. I must stop Christmas from coming ... but how?
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-08-2019, 12:51 PM
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I think your friend just doesn't understand how crippling social anxiety can be. It seems like you are too nervous about the class. Maybe you can take it when you feel better. For me I can hardly talk to anyone so that would be very hard for me. I'm sorry I don't have very good advice.
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