Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. - Page 5 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #81 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-16-2012, 08:37 PM
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Any tips for getting over someone and not thinking about what could of been?
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post #82 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-17-2012, 10:44 PM
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As for many things, its easier said than done..
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post #83 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-17-2012, 10:46 PM
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Any tips for getting over someone and not thinking about what could of been?
whenever I'm trying to get over someone (always a guy) I give myself a little time to dwell mentally then I usually write out how I'm feeling in a letter to the guy that I DON'T send..so idk if you're a writer or anything but it def helps me

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post #84 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-18-2012, 09:54 PM
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Hmm... I do think that I have this problem as well. If someone does something bad to me, I don't get mad. However, I never forget. I won't bring it up or say anything about it and I am somewhat able to forgive, but I never really forget.

Things like my dad abandoning my family when I was 13... I'm not angry about it, but I haven't forgiven him. I still don't feel comfortable talking to him. Abusive things my mother has done, I don't talk about it but I remember. I'm not angry, but it still hurts thinking about it.
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post #85 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-19-2012, 02:11 PM
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absolutely right.


Let it go let it go!!!!!!! You're awesome.
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post #86 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-21-2012, 10:46 PM
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Say it with me. Let it go, let it go, and guess what? Let it go.

One of our biggest problems is that we always dwell in the past. Just let it go, its already done. Thinking about it isnt going to change anything. The only thing thinking will do is WASTE your time, and bring back all those horrible FEELINGS you "think" you had when that moment was actually happening.

Waste our time you say? Yeah. You know how people always ask you if you are okay? If you are feeling sad? Etc, etc. Well thats because we are always lost in thought. Always thinking about the past, and always thinking about the future. We aren't actually PRESENT in the moment. Our bodies are there but our mind is off in a distant world. No presence. Something we all can work on.

So when you think of something and go "crap I wish.. this and that couldve gone better.." Well what can I say? What can you say? It already happened. Worry about the now, and the past wont be such a problem.
I let go of the past, but the present is still a piece of ****.
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post #87 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-23-2012, 10:27 PM
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So needed post..
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post #88 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-24-2012, 09:21 PM
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The only issues I can't let go, are the ones I can change or have control over. Otherwise I don't sweat it, not worth the stress.
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post #89 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-24-2012, 09:43 PM
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Hey, just wanted to say great advice. I realize that it is the hardest part of Social Anxiety and always trying to forget or Let Go of the thoughts that comes to my mind. But, with dedication and persistence that is the key, without fighting the anxiety with negative thoughts. That just fuel it more, rather think positive and calming thoughts. P.S. I am also from Stockton, California O.P. at least I know I am not alone.
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post #90 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-25-2012, 10:06 AM Thread Starter
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Hey, just wanted to say great advice. I realize that it is the hardest part of Social Anxiety and always trying to forget or Let Go of the thoughts that comes to my mind. But, with dedication and persistence that is the key, without fighting the anxiety with negative thoughts. That just fuel it more, rather think positive and calming thoughts. P.S. I am also from Stockton, California O.P. at least I know I am not alone.
Yes I agree. Dedication and persistence is key.

and thats awesome! That makes 3 people from Stockton, CA that visit this site now.

bye
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post #91 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-25-2012, 10:15 AM
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Any tips for getting over someone and not thinking about what could of been?
You are probably better off by not being in the relationship. More time can be spent focusing on you and not divided with someone at the moment.

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post #92 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-26-2012, 02:29 PM
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I signed up just to say thank you for the post.

I've been going through a pretty rough time lately, and those simple words have changed my day.

Thank you.
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post #93 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-26-2012, 04:51 PM Thread Starter
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I signed up just to say thank you for the post.

I've been going through a pretty rough time lately, and those simple words have changed my day.

Thank you.
Thanks for the kind words sir!

Glad I could be of some help, hope things are going better for you now.

bye
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post #94 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-26-2012, 10:01 PM
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Thanks for the kind words sir!

Glad I could be of some help, hope things are going better for you now.
They certainly are. I could barely get myself to work this morning, but now I'm actually feeling good about myself.
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post #95 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-28-2012, 07:28 AM
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Omg, you hit the nail on the head. I so do that. What to do about it?
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post #96 of 860 (permalink) Old 03-28-2012, 07:39 AM
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Let it go.. i'll try to ..

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post #97 of 860 (permalink) Old 04-01-2012, 01:06 PM
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great post... i can relate... like it says on kung fu panda... "the past is history the futures a mystery and today is a gift... that's why it's called the present."
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post #98 of 860 (permalink) Old 04-03-2012, 01:39 AM
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I definitely struggle with this. Mostly at night, when I'm trying to fall asleep, I'll find myself thinking about something that happened years ago, and I get all embarrassed and start beating myself up for how stupid I acted and start thinking of how I should have acted. Next thing I know its morning and I haven't slept a wink!

I know I need to let these things go, its really not healthy to dwell on things. It's easier said than done though.

PS. diesel, love the Kung Fu Panda quote! =D
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post #99 of 860 (permalink) Old 04-06-2012, 12:24 AM
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To be honest, there have been many times where I dwelt on the past FAR too much. Even to this day, I always find myself thinking about it, and I believe that the real reason why I do is because of this terrible experience I had with a "friend" I was with for about 7 years... and by "friend" (notice the quotes), I mean a person who I thought was my friend... truth is, she never truly was. Long story short, she lied about our friendship because she was pressured by relatives to be my friend, and it hurt knowing that she had been with me for so long and didn't even like me to begin with. It gave me a lot of trust issues, and made me wonder if everyone else I meet would be the same way...

You're absolutely right though... it's not healthy to dwell on something that's already long gone. It's probably about time I move on, accept the fact that she's not a real friend, and continue searching for other people who will truly respect me a lot more than she did! Thanks for posting this!
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post #100 of 860 (permalink) Old 04-06-2012, 01:08 AM
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