Is having an Anxiety disorder a good reason to not consider to myself a coward or *****? - Page 4 - Social Anxiety Forum
Reply
 
Thread Tools
post #61 of 67 (permalink) Old 01-06-2020, 07:58 AM
SAS Member
 
millenniumman75's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Dayton, OH
Gender: Male
Age: 45
Posts: 154,024
My Mood: Angelic
Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisinmd View Post
Very well thought out and said. I totally agree. We are tough and strong because we survived and made it through all the difficult things we had to endure. Normal people are not as mentally tough for the most part because they don't have to face the challenges that we do dealing with our mental illness.

It's not a mental illness; it's an emotional disorder. That's the first thing.


Second, my brother flat out told me that I was the "strong one". I was the one to have all the panic attacks and am on medication (at least monitored by a doctor). He smokes and drinks - and that worries me because he's got two kids now. I am already having to play the older uncle and grandfather since our dad passed away in 2007 (the anniversary is later in January).


I found that ironic. I was the one who was bullied and teased really bad. Also ironic, the people who made fun of me can't face me today. Oh, the stories I could tell!

millenniumman75
You are a success story waiting to happen!
Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover....
Live and HELP live is better!

TROLL ALERT STATUS:
CHAT -> BERT

FORUMS -> ERNIE
(troll activity on the increase)

WATCH WHAT YOU TYPE!
millenniumman75 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #62 of 67 (permalink) Old 01-06-2020, 09:00 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Maryland
Language: English
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,220
Quote:
Originally Posted by millenniumman75 View Post
I found that ironic. I was the one who was bullied and teased really bad. Also ironic, the people who made fun of me can't face me today. Oh, the stories I could tell!
Care to share some of those stories? It would be interesting and may help somebody as well
chrisinmd is online now  
post #63 of 67 (permalink) Old 01-08-2020, 11:55 AM
SAS Member
 
millenniumman75's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Dayton, OH
Gender: Male
Age: 45
Posts: 154,024
My Mood: Angelic
Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisinmd View Post
Care to share some of those stories? It would be interesting and may help somebody as well
One was in college.....when I thought all the high-school crap went away. Part of it was my doing, but I didn't expect the outcome nonetheless.


I met a guy in one of my classes and he asked me one day about a couple I knew.


The guy of the couple I grew up with (he was a year younger) and played baseball with was cool, but his girlfriend was an evil classmate of mine. Our freshman year in high school, we were all in band and she told me that this senior girl liked me and proceeded to tell people. Well, the senior girl confronted me in a humiliating way. Needless to say, I didn't think too kindly of my classmate.....although the senior girl and I would later be friends as we played in the pep band in college. We talked about that incident and thought that was really poor judgment on everybody's part.


Anyway, back to the guy. I casually mentioned that I thought he was cool and frankly never wanted to see her again. Well, he must have talked about me to them, because another rumor was started and he proceeded to call me really ugly names when seeing me around campus.....even when in conversation with other people and the name calling being in mid-sentence.


…...Fast-forward another five years or so and the guy lives about a block away from me near a park that is between our neighborhoods. He saw me and called my name trying to get my attention - I ignored him.


Every few years or so, I will see him at the grocery store or will see him walking his dog. Whenever he sees me, he's like a deer caught in headlights. I just walk on by.


I get a lot of that - people fleeing, or freezing in a panic. I think that's good. I survived their $#!7 and am not going to take any more of it.

millenniumman75
You are a success story waiting to happen!
Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover....
Live and HELP live is better!

TROLL ALERT STATUS:
CHAT -> BERT

FORUMS -> ERNIE
(troll activity on the increase)

WATCH WHAT YOU TYPE!
millenniumman75 is offline  
 
post #64 of 67 (permalink) Old 09-16-2020, 09:08 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Maryland
Language: English
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,220
Quote:
Originally Posted by That Random Guy View Post
For me, I don't think so. In fact, I see it the other way around.

I feel that my main issue for having anxiety is because I'm a coward.

I always come to the same conclusion when I conduct root cause analysis for my many, many failures.

My anxiety has definitely dealt a hand in my failures but ultimately, it's been my cowardice that's prevented me from achieving many things in my life.

I suppose one could say that it isn't solely due to cowardice, but in my eyes, I am a coward. It's for that reason why I avoid confrontations.

The anxiety definitely makes it worse, but the only way to get better is to keep trying and push through the experiences in order to get better at whatever it is we want to become.

So have you made any progress on the cowardice as you see it? What has helped or not?
chrisinmd is online now  
post #65 of 67 (permalink) Old 09-16-2020, 07:21 PM
SAS Member
 
lily's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2018
Language: English
Posts: 1,756
Quote:
Originally Posted by ronaldjshine View Post
The past and your genetics are out of your control.
I agree with this but I think violence is not the answer. you don't want to sound insulting towards yourself so let's just say that if 25% of you could've stood up for yourself but you didn't learn it, you could redefine yourself like this poster has said and make a choice now in cases where it is safe to do so and in other cases where you don't do it, you're just being wise.

And also being tough is not the most important thing, being happy, healthy, kind and wise is.
lily is offline  
post #66 of 67 (permalink) Old 09-16-2020, 10:10 PM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Maryland
Language: English
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,220
Quote:
Originally Posted by lily View Post
I agree with this but I think violence is not the answer. you don't want to sound insulting towards yourself so let's just say that if 25% of you could've stood up for yourself but you didn't learn it, you could redefine yourself like this poster has said and make a choice now in cases where it is safe to do so and in other cases where you don't do it, you're just being wise.

And also being tough is not the most important thing, being happy, healthy, kind and wise is.
Thanks for the comment. I agree being tough is not the most important thing and being happy, healthy, kind and wise as important as well. But I think people take advantage of being kind and happy. So you need to be able to defend yourself first and then you can experience the other emotions. I dont think you can be happy and kind if people are abusing you or taking advantage of you.
chrisinmd is online now  
post #67 of 67 (permalink) Old 09-17-2020, 05:21 AM
SAS Member
 
lily's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2018
Language: English
Posts: 1,756
Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisinmd View Post
Thanks for the comment. I agree being tough is not the most important thing and being happy, healthy, kind and wise as important as well. But I think people take advantage of being kind and happy. So you need to be able to defend yourself first and then you can experience the other emotions. I dont think you can be happy and kind if people are abusing you or taking advantage of you.
That's true! You cannot be happy and kind if people r abusing/taking advantage of you so we do need to learn to stand up for ourselves (but be wise about it as well. for example there's no need to say anything if the person is violent or a psychopath or has a mental illness in which they're a danger but you can report those people) and if we can't because of our disorder, God will be the judge and it will be b/t God and those who sin against you and you're welcome!
lily is offline  
Reply

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Help me with my anxiety disorder please! :( reptiliantroll Coping With Social Anxiety 15 02-02-2018 01:58 PM
Study Examines Neural Bases of Social Anxiety Disorder TorLin Self Help Resources 2 04-16-2009 01:46 PM
good article (why people don't understand SA) Anxiety75 Coping With Social Anxiety 18 03-15-2008 08:03 PM
Buddhist anxiety article waaom Spiritual Support 6 06-08-2005 03:55 PM

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome