i need a job...but im afraid to work...how do you cope with it? - Page 3 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #41 of 64 (permalink) Old 04-20-2011, 05:52 AM
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Was made redundant from my last job and haven't picked anything up since. I tend to go for jobs which allow me to spend a good deal of time working on my own. That limits which positions i can apply for, add the recession into the mix and I'm really struggling to find anything I can even apply for.
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post #42 of 64 (permalink) Old 04-20-2011, 07:38 AM
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I own a sports bar. I don't work in front, I do office work. So if you can manage to get a job doing data entry.. it's an office job and most of times you'll be left alone. If your SA is extreme, hardest part will be an interview - rest is piece of cake. CPA offices.. insurance.. dental.. restaurant.. everyone has their own data entry.. wish you best of luck
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post #43 of 64 (permalink) Old 04-20-2011, 07:41 AM
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Look for a job where you know there is hardly any people. Maybe one day, youll have the privilege of working from home.
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post #44 of 64 (permalink) Old 04-20-2011, 08:52 AM
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I'm glad I'm not the only one who is anxious about getting a job. I've been drifting for years because of it. I do some volunteer work but that does not have the same responsibility as a payed job. At least I have disability. Although that hasn't helped my situation since I cling onto that instead of doing something about the anxiety.
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post #45 of 64 (permalink) Old 10-10-2013, 04:21 AM
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getting back out there.


just to say a huge thanks for you posting. That gave me a real thread of hope at my low
est ebb. thank you
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Originally Posted by TeenyBeany View Post
sit down and think of a list of positions that would suit your needs. For me it was working with a small company (15 or less employees), working in a cubicle (so i wouldnt have to talk to people), and the work needed to be full time. I ended up landing a job in telemarketing where I sat in a cubicle for 8 hours a day and talked on the phone. Have been with the company for 5 years. During my 3rd year they asked if I wanted to work from home (since i'm a reliable and trustworthy employee).
Hang in there. If you really think hard enough, you'll figure out what the best job is for you. There's a job out there for everyone
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post #46 of 64 (permalink) Old 10-10-2013, 07:10 AM
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I'm a civil engineer. I work, but with a huge amount of anxiety, worry, and stress. Everybody knows it. I can't hide it from anyone. The reason I keep on doing it is because I don't want to be a burden on my family and I would die before I would ever ask someone for money again. I grew up in a house with my old man yelling at me all the time, making me feel very guilty for costing him money. I would not go through that again. That's why I must work. There's no choice.
lol , that is why i want to get out and get my own place .
even if i give him monthly payment he's still nagging 24/7

last work was in 2007 , i don;t know how to get back at work , it makes me sick only thinking about it.
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post #47 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-01-2013, 07:04 PM
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25 I have ADD, Anxiety, Depression and i have been laid off for 7 months and have been living off unemployment insurance. I work for a union so getting a job is as easy as calling in to them and asking for one because there is allot of work up where I live. I told them I was going to take some time off to sort out some other bs in my life. Now I can't get myself back to work, not having to deal with all the crap that comes with keeping a job has just sucked me in and the thought of going back to work almost gives me a panic attack. I'm nervous that they're going to get mad and just fire me for being off for so long, they might not even care but I don't know.

I've had 8 jobs and have been fired from 4 for being incompetent, went to post secondary and flunked out taking a course I really enjoyed, took another post secondary course, passed and got a job but got fired again. I end up hating every job I do, the repetition is torture on my attention deficit mind and eventually its no longer stimulating enough to sustain any interest, my mind then wanders and I'm rushing through the job to get it done and so I make mistakes, witch makes me nervous then i make more mistakes, witch subsequently makes me frustrated and angry, then I can't think at all so failure is inevadable, and its just a downward spiral to getting fired.

So my resume is crap, I'm scared and confused with no confidence, motivation, or hope, I'm distracted, anxious, and depressed. I'm really not sure how i'm going to make it through life at this rate. I'm I just lazy? Do I need to push myself more? am I just a ***** who needs to man up? I have no clue anymore.
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post #48 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 12:18 AM
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That has been my big problem with work: working with people.

Not working with paperwork, lab equipment, computers, animals, or things..... just people. My work is fine, it is my problems with social graces dealing with humans.
I work better on my own with as little contact with people as possible. The only way I can cope is to work by myself as much as possible.


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post #49 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 02:20 AM
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Red face

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Originally Posted by little_miss View Post
I'm glad I'm not the only one who is anxious about getting a job. I've been drifting for years because of it. I do some volunteer work but that does not have the same responsibility as a payed job. At least I have disability. Although that hasn't helped my situation since I cling onto that instead of doing something about the anxiety.
yeaaah im on disability as well. its really good money and im very greatful to centerlink. id be stuck at home without it

do you have to do anything to keep getting payments? i have to work at the salvos 2 days a week but its pretty good the people are so nice it makes me want to cry but yeah

i might be getting a factory job which would be awesome because its all assembly line stuff so im HOPING theres little human interaction

and the thing is i WANT to work! i get bored doing nothing, and if i was on 700$ a week all that money .....

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This world is so ****ed up! The fact that just looking good will completely turn your life around seems wrong to me. What are we ugly people supposed to do?
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Originally Posted by onelovelove View Post
basically all i can do is to suffer the consequences of the DNA i have been given.
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Originally Posted by LoneSurfer View Post
Looks are like a lens through which your every action is interpreted
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post #50 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 02:23 AM
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just to say a huge thanks for you posting. That gave me a real thread of hope at my low
est ebb. thank you

are you gonna stay at that job or move to something "higher up" ?

i always thought telemarketing would be good, its just the interview

hows the pay? working from home must bee

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This world is so ****ed up! The fact that just looking good will completely turn your life around seems wrong to me. What are we ugly people supposed to do?
Quote:
Originally Posted by onelovelove View Post
basically all i can do is to suffer the consequences of the DNA i have been given.
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Originally Posted by LoneSurfer View Post
Looks are like a lens through which your every action is interpreted
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post #51 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 03:42 AM
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Three choices:
  • Just force yourself to go for the job, and probably lose a bit more self-respect in the process of realising SA doesn't tend to go away.

  • See a psychologist, get all that CBTish stuff sorted and probably do a little better than you would've without therapy.

  • Take some nice tasty drugs/medication. Yum.

Obviously you can guess which one I choose.
Or do all three depending how and which works best.
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post #52 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 11:14 PM
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Not only am I nervous about applying for a job, but I would also have no way to get there because of anxiety about driving and public transportation. *shakes head*
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post #53 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-02-2013, 11:42 PM
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I just got a job after being out of work for a year. I had to because I need to pay for my braces and if I want to keep living with my parents xD

Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around
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post #54 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 12:48 AM
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I'm in the same boat, though where I live most jobs are like customer services and labour jobs. Both of them are too hard on me, first one is social anxiety and second I have lots of pain in my body so labour jobs just kill me. What makes things worse effexor doesn't seem to work for me, just makes sweat a lot doing very little things.

I know that I'm always tired and my movation isn't the best which affects me to get a job too.

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We are what we are, so don't change who you are just improve yourself to overcome the challenges that life throws at you. Then one day you'll have what you worked for.
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post #55 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-03-2013, 08:23 AM
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Relate HEAVILY to this thread. Hopefully we can get more people to chime in.
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post #56 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-18-2013, 01:52 PM
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You can do this, babes. One step at a time and you will get there.


Hi barb8812,

I've had a similar issue with going back to work again, although a bit of a different story.

So I will share with you the comfort and encouragement I myself have gotten to prep for this next step in life

Finding a place where you feel safe to talk about your anxieties. Here is a good place but if you would like to be with a counsellor, someone who you feel comfortable speaking to or a positive friend, I think that is a best thing . You mentioned you were a student, I'm sure you have free counselling at your school that you can start with. If you would like to continue to something more, you can always go from there and she/he can guide you toward that. Universities and Colleges usually have a career and counselling development department that are prepared to help students whether it be life stuff, career or academics. They're usually found in the health departments of the school. Also, there is academic advisors that can be helpful. You wouldn't think it immediately but our academic advisor for each department are also prepared to help students deal with real life stuff such as social anxiety. There is help and support all around us . Don't be ashamed or embarassed for feeling like this, it happens to so many of us, especially when we are getting ready for adulthood. Don't feel bad, you are just figuring out who you are and what is right for you.

In saying that last part, feeling for what is right for you. You're not choosing a career in your part time job, it's merely for the sake of having money for yourself, right? So in that sense, the number of opportunities are huge. You don't need to work in customer service. Like someone mentioned above, you can work in a small office or even with a relative at their work. There are a lot of options. You can always contact a job recruitment agency (there are free ones) and tell them that you prefer not to work in a largely public job, something lower key in terms of social interaction and you'd be surprised at the opportunities around you . You can have money and find yourself somewhere interesting to spend 8-20 hours of your week. I've had a variety of jobs in my life (10 in all already!). It's amazing all the skills you can gain from the different experiences and the friends you can make. From each job experience, we learn, we grow and we become stronger and more skilled versions of ourselves. Our confidence and self esteem grows too.

Waitressing can be a very stressful job, especially if you are already suffering with social anxiety. It's good to sometimes throw yourself in the deep end to learn to swim but I mean, if that's way too stressful, bringing us wayy more negative than positive out of the experience than clearly, it isn't the right way to go about it.

I am sure that one day you will reach a point in your life where you won't feel as anxious in social settings. Who knows, maybe one day you will even be a public speaker because you have conquered this, you never know.

One step at a time, babes, take it as slow as you want. You are getting there already. Talk to a positive friend/counsellor about it, know that you can do this like so many others have and like you have on other first highly anxious parts of your life that now you feel confident in, and let yourself be in that positive mind set of finding a job that is right for you. Know that there are jobs out there that are perfect for you just waiting for you to apply to them. Then go out there and apply to them.

I am so sure that once you will start your new job and will be feeling confident in it, you will feel yourself wanting to challenge yourself further and do a small social interaction trial that you will triumph at. Then another and another until one day, you will never feel anxious about working again. You'll get there, hun You can do it, one step at a time
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post #57 of 64 (permalink) Old 11-18-2013, 02:46 PM
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I work online right now so i dont have a worry in this department. It can be hard.
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post #58 of 64 (permalink) Old 12-04-2013, 01:25 PM
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I thought it was only me that is suffering from this, im 21 and had a work when im 16 in a fastfood chain, it was good at first but competition arises later and anxiety between my co-workers starts.. i quit the job without telling the company, I've just finished my college degree but feels like it was not enough.. my family forces me to work but i'm only giving them my excuses, im really afraid of rejections..
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post #59 of 64 (permalink) Old 12-04-2013, 01:38 PM
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I work at petsmart, petcare. What I do is I forget the fact I have anxiety, ask everyone if they need help. I still of course struggle with talking sometimes, but people don't really look at you weird. You just think that you sound weird or oh you're horrible at your job. But really, I love animals and I love to try to help people so this is my motivation.

Motivate yourself to get that money to use it for yourself to get better. Maybe think of how you can afford a hair cut, or that cute bag. Or wait, yuo can go shopping by yourself and try to find a great outfit to wear around the house or to jog in.

Please get a job, I felt so much better. I got my first job the same day I turned 19. Please...do this for yourself. Lie during the interview on some questions, study, don't make yourself nervous. Don't freak yourself out.=)

In dreams, I meet you in long conversation
We both wake in lonely beds, and different cities
And time is ticking a sweet summer race in you
And you've got your demons and darling they all
♥ ❤ look like me ❤ ♥
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post #60 of 64 (permalink) Old 12-04-2013, 01:42 PM
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Consider getting further education for a job that does not require much people skills. While not having great people skills is a disadvantage when searching for jobs, a good education background can help.
Studying and getting good grades is a solitary activity. It shouldn't be much of problem for a person with SA.
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