I asked my current doctor for a mild, non addictive anti-anxiety med, and she flat out told me, "you don't need a pill for your anxiety, you need counseling." Then I told her, I don't want a benzo, just buspar, because maybe that would help the anxiety/paranoia just a bit. Instead, she told me to take ativan (which she prescribed for me to sleep) when I'm anxious, even though she told me 5 minutes earlier that she did not give benzos for anxiety.
I will either get into contact with the hospital, although I'm not sure how to go about doing that, or see my sister's doctor. She said she'd pay the $150 visit, because this particular doctor is apparently amazing.
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went.. Then it dawned on me.