Having a hard time accepting and realizing that a majority of people have friends - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 11:38 AM Thread Starter
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Having a hard time accepting and realizing that a majority of people have friends


When meeting someone new, they're more quiet than i am. Then i begin to have thoughts in my mind like, "are they like me, do they not have friend". So then i get all excited like i have a new best friend or something. Then hours later i see them socializing like a butterfly with friends, and i get so damn depressed

I'm not saying that people can't have friends, but it just seems that way to me when meeting someone, and i get jealous. anyone else feel this way?


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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 12:16 PM
 
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I'm the same way! I've met plenty of people who seemed like they were just like me. Then you see them at the lunch table eating with a bunch of people! It seems like most people do have friends and are in groups. It's hard having no friends trying to fit into a group.

How do you tell someone you have no friends??
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 12:48 PM
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argh me too! I met someone recently who said she'd never met any of her classmates outside of college and for moment I was comforted that I wasn't the only socially inept one out there. But on her facebook I found out she has massive social network due to her church... almost makes me think I should join a religion...

I am going to completely work on making myself happy.

“Fear can make you do more wrong than hate or jealousy. If you're afraid you don’t commit yourself to life completely; fear makes you always, always hold something back.”
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 01:37 PM
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My guess would be that maybe they are a little quiet in new situations, but open up once you get to know them. Or it could be that since we're quiet and laid back they act the same way to us. Kind of like a feeling out process before they act like their usual self which could be loud or funny for example.
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 03:34 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox Kid View Post
I'm the same way! I've met plenty of people who seemed like they were just like me. Then you see them at the lunch table eating with a bunch of people! It seems like most people do have friends and are in groups. It's hard having no friends trying to fit into a group.

How do you tell someone you have no friends??
I usually tell them via IM lol


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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 04:20 PM
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Thinking you have met someone like yourself only to find out they aren't like you really sucks.

"I have found the Iron to be my greatest friend. It never freaks out on me, never runs. Friends may come and go. But two hundred pounds is always two hundred pounds." - Henry Rollins
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 04:33 PM
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Yeah i've met a few people like this...Just when i think i've met someone i think is a loner like me i soon find out they are not. It's as if i am searching for someone who is at the same level as me for peace of mind in a way.
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 02-04-2010, 04:54 PM
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Some people are reserved in their personal affairs, some people don't open up to strangers, some people live sheltered lives, some people are selective in their company and behavior, and some people are just not interested in other people at all. None of them are shy or have SA. They are their natural self and that is just the way they are.

to seem normal, but feel awkward,
to act awkward, but want to be normal.
When to talk up, when to be quiet, when to act, when to laugh,
It's like having a bad timer in social interactions, to know how but not when,or to know when to be social but not what being social is.

That is really the sign of a disorder. It's the paradox of SA and most disorders. Not that the behaviors exists, but that the person doesn't want the behavior.

People may exhibit bad and even irrational behavior, but if they are content with their behavior, then it isn't really a disorder.
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