have you guys ever danced? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 09:48 AM Thread Starter
 
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have you guys ever danced?


homecoming... clubs... a wedding, whatever. have you ever danced? how was the experience?

i am way to self conscious about how i look, and whether my dancing looks stupid to other people. plus i feel like i just can't get in sync with the music and don't know how i'm supposed to move.
i've had to awkwardly dance at a homecoming before and also at a wedding, but i was really uncomfortable the whole time.

edit:

i also feel like club dancing is an excuse to grind up on people. and is kind of wierd to begin with.

but i can also kind of see how dancing could be fun...
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post #2 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 10:51 AM
 
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I’ve danced at weddings because I have to. I usually hid behind large women as they dance lol. In my culture, you have to dance at weddings and if you are sitting down, you best believe that someone will come over, grab your hand, and make you dance. I usually just move from side to side because I don’t want any eyes on me. I always feel completely paranoid and self-conscious. Not to mention that all weddings are taped and the camera man usually zooms in on my dancing which is mortifying.

There are some moments when my S.A. is gone where I dance randomly. I’ve always wanted to take some dance classes.

I’ve never been to a club and for good reason because all people do there is grind and dry hump. I could never handle that lol. I’ve never been to any of my high school dances. I’ve gone to my middle school dances but at that age nobody dances.
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post #3 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 10:56 AM
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Ive slow danced with some chicks but other than that i have no clue how to dance. Im way to selfconscious.
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post #4 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 11:21 AM
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I've danced at clubs before. It's a fun experience if you turn your brain off and just get into the music.

If the club is crowded then you have to find your little space to dance in, which isn't the greatest since I like to move around, but it would be good for you because then no one would be paying attention to you. As far as not knowing how to dance. Sometimes it helps to just observe people and try to mimick them if they are doing some generic moves. Most people dance the same way in clubs so it wouldn't be that hard to pick it up.
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post #5 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 11:24 AM
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omg ive never EVER danced

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post #6 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 11:28 AM
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Danced? No........Moved around awkwardly pretending to enjoy myself...Yes :-)

In order to get me to go on a dancefloor i have to be drunk enough not to care...There is no way in hell i'd step on a dance floor otherwise! I get so self-conscious and anxious my whole body gets stiff and i am unable to move almost, afraid of how i appear.

On new years eve i went to celebrate with my female friend who lives in Poland. I was so awkward the whole time. After the midnight she suggested that we go to a disco.......Oh god! I started to feel queezy and anxious. And because my friend does not drink and hate seeing people drunk i could not get drunk to feel comfortable. I felt very relieved when we couldn't find a disco!

I feel that i give the impression that i am boring because i don't enjoy dancing. In truth most people are not good dancers even non sa people, but the point is to have fun and let oneself go but i am unable to do that. God i'm so uptight!
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post #7 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 11:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keith View Post
Ive slow danced with some chicks but other than that i have no clue how to dance. Im way to selfconscious.
Slow dancing is easy, all you have to do is sway your body a bit.
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post #8 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 11:51 AM
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Actually yeah, I have. A couple years ago at a school dance of course. My "friend" forced me into it. Horrible experience. Thank God it was only for 30 seconds.

what cannot be said will be wept
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post #9 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 12:10 PM
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Once. Now. No, I don't dance ever. I make Julia Louis Dreyfus in that episode of Seinfeld look like Baryshnikov. I avoid any situations that would put me in a spot where I have to awkwardly flail around like a dying octopus.
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post #10 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 12:24 PM
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As you don't like dance like this you'll be fine:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xi4O1yi6b0

"When I was a boy, I laid in my twin sized bed wondering where my brother was."-- Mitch Hedberg
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post #11 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 01:45 PM
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I've danced twice at clubs. I was so loaded i didn't care what anyone thought.

Other than that.. NEVER. Way to self conscious.
I spend the whole time walking around and going to the bar to get more loaded. lol.
i also can't dance at all. i don't hear the beat, its just awful lol.
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post #12 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 02:10 PM Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hellosunshine View Post
Not to mention that all weddings are taped and the camera man usually zooms in on my dancing which is mortifying.

There are some moments when my S.A. is gone where I dance randomly. I’ve always wanted to take some dance classes.
ha that is horrible.... i don't think i could handle if i knew i was being videotaped! i've always wanted to take dancing classes too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gaz View Post
I feel that i give the impression that i am boring because i don't enjoy dancing. In truth most people are not good dancers even non sa people, but the point is to have fun and let oneself go but i am unable to do that. God i'm so uptight!
sometimes i wish i could just have fun with it. maybe next life.. hah.

lol @ the seinfeld video.

we should all get together and throw an SA dance party.. lol
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post #13 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 02:21 PM
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Hell no. I'll be too embarassed to do that kind of thing.
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post #14 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 03:18 PM
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Yes actually.

First time I can recall is the time at girls sleep-away camp they took us to a boys camp for a social dance one night. I slow danced with three different guys during the party but it was kind of lame. I was so nervous I forgot to ask the name of the first guy I danced with and stammered a lot, the second guy seemed to be dancing with me to avoid someone else and the third guy I had trouble bringing stuff up to talk about so it was way awkward.

The first time I remember doing it well is at a graduation party in my teens, I actually got really into the music and did this crazy shaking dance move - and other people on the floor were cheering me on so I kept doing it. Rare glory moment.

Hasn't gone so well since unless you count conga lines. Haven't been to a club, was at a wedding once but didn't dance.

The msot fun I've had dancing was at a rave dance at an anime convention I attended last year. Also on a dare I did the macarena with a few other people in the middle of the rave dance floor (and yes I was in costume). It was way fun, didn't care about the people staring. My SA does seem to vanish often at conventions.
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post #15 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 03:35 PM
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As with many things dancing is something that is fun if you're not thinking about it to much. I also think the situation dictates how you may feel about it too.

In a club environment there's a kind of coolness factor at play with moves & such. Personally I wouldn't feel comfortable doing so under such circumstances. Given that I'm also a fan of heavy metal music I do enjoy some forms of what I would call "interpretive dance" that is you move in the manor that the music makes you feel not necessarily to a beat. As a musician this applies to me in multiple genres when I play my instruments. I am often like this, moving as I feel rather than to the beat. Also if you're in a more "hippie style" environment this tends to be alright as well & very fun/freeing I find. In more formal occasion with slow dance & such I would indeed be very self conscious.

For me it's a toss of a coin & the circumstance that dictates whether I'll dance, plus despite the fact that I am a drummer I can fall off beat which is another reason I'm a fan of free flowing movement
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post #16 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 04:00 PM
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Ive danced at clubs and bars. I think the intoxication helped me shake my booty. I would never do it sober.
But I did dance as a child. The propper dancing. Really enjoyed it too.
As for school 'prom' I never made it to my school 'Formal' or 'Debutante' (We have Formals then Deb Balls here instead of 'Prom') and I wouldnt of gone if we had one. The Formal is much more like your Prom. Although Debutante Balls are much more formal than the 'Formal'.
I went to my brothers Debutante a few months ago, and WOW definately not something I would be doing. It was so formal and the most awkward SA inducing thing I ever had to see. My poor (quiet) brother had to run down a grand stair case (he ran because he couldnt slide down the bannisters like the other guys) then dance the tango, cha cha and jive with his partner dressed like she was getting married (all girls wear white ball gowns at debs). My brother looked so awkward. Poor him. haha.

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post #17 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 04:30 PM
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No but I don't really care about it. A lot of people, even without SA, won't dance unless they are drunk. It's more common than you might think.

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post #18 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 04:34 PM
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In public? Only twice... once when I was in middle school with my boyfriend, and I remember people laughing at us from the sidelines becuase we were, um, social outcasts I guess. Then, I kind of danced again in high school at my freshman homecoming (if standing on the outer square of the people actual people dancing counts). Actually, now that I think about it, I went to several dance when I was in middle school. Every dance I've ever been to was humiliating and had me convinced at a certain age never to go to another.

In private, though, I love to dance -- and I'm a total nerd when I do it too! ^_~ If nobody's home, I grab my MP3 player and go wild!
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post #19 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 04:41 PM Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dolly View Post
In private, though, I love to dance -- and I'm a total nerd when I do it too! ^_~ If nobody's home, I grab my MP3 player and go wild!
guilty as well ^^
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post #20 of 43 (permalink) Old 06-17-2009, 05:53 PM
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I dance all the time. I've danced at clubs, at weddings, at parties, etc. I dance at home and I dance at work.

Unfortunately I am not a great dancer.
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