Do you feel really bad when someone tries to be your friend but you don't? - Social Anxiety Forum
 
Thread Tools
post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 01:45 AM Thread Starter
Permanently Banned
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Age: 35
Posts: 2,524

Do you feel really bad when someone tries to be your friend but you don't?


I am going through a really weird period in my life and also have been working around 50-60 hours a week although this wed is the last day at the job. Anyway trying to figure out life and what not has left me with very little time. I am also kind of a loner. So when people I am acquainted with want to get to know me better or hang out I usually blow them off. I never realized how callous I come off as until someone mentioned it to me today. Now thinking back I feel like the world's biggest jerk. The worst part is I never even knew I was being so cold. Ugh. How do I deal with situations like this without looking like a prick?
jamesd is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 01:50 AM
SAS Member
 
strato86's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Lancaster, England
Gender: Male
Posts: 146
If someone is trying to hang out with me I will let them, as it is an oppurtunity to gain a friend. I have more trouble with trying to get to know people who don't want to hang out with me.

"I believe that the definition of definition is reinvention. To not be like your parents. To not be like your friends. To be yourself.
Completely."
strato86 is offline  
post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 01:52 AM Thread Starter
Permanently Banned
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Age: 35
Posts: 2,524
I just have too much going on right now to make new friends. Not to mention I am a loner and slightly depressed right now. Probably not a good time to engage with new people.
jamesd is offline  
 
post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 06:47 AM
SAS Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Gender: Female
Age: 41
Posts: 41
Maybe just explain your situation to them. I try to make friends but get blown off sometimes and it would be good to get an explanation.
11223 is offline  
post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 07:44 AM
o_O
 
Freiheit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: USA
Gender: Female
Age: 29
Posts: 6,024
Kind of, though that doesn't happen to me anymore the way it used to.
Freiheit is offline  
post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 08:11 AM
SAS Member
 
victoriangirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Almost Europe
Gender: Female
Posts: 799
I know how you feel - we had this intern in the office, she was all alone in a foreign city/country and everytime she wanted to hang out with me, I'd blow her off. A couple of times I did go to lunch with her, but I was too nervous to really enjoy her company. She was a really nice person, someone I could become friends with - but I was too nervous, too tired, too anxious to be for her.

I feel very bad because I know she felt very lonely and was desperately trying to be friends with me. No one ever really wants to be my friend, and the one person who does, gets ignored by me. I hate SA!
victoriangirl is offline  
post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 08:18 AM
Inside my head im free
 
ValiantThor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Maryland
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 544
God im soo feeling this man. Recently, ive had my old good friends, my really good friends try contacting me and i just igonored the phone calls till they stoped coming. They are all home from college now and wanna hang out i guess but im not going to i know it. My old girlfriend texted my recently saying im sorry if ive caused any hurt or pain upon you, she dumped me for some jerk, thats acually when i started feeling depressed and anxious. So she still trys to talk to me but yet again i ignore. My idiot sister basicly told everyone in town that i havnt left my bedroom since i graduated highschool and that ive tryed killing myself. Now i get all this sympathy from old friends wanting to hang out with me and thats the main reason i dont wanna talk to them. Thats why that girl asked if she hurt me i guess, my sister must have blabbed to her about what im dealing with. Im such a loser though, i graduated in 2009 and i still ahvnt done literally anything since then, I jsut stay in my room

My point of view, while extremely cogent, is unpopular….That the repressive nature of the legalities vis-a-vis drugs are destroying the legal system and corrupting the police system. -Jack Nicholson-
ValiantThor is offline  
post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 02:35 PM
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: VA
Gender: Male
Age: 43
Posts: 204
People are always trying to be my friend but I always push them away. Sometimes I have to be really mean and I feel bad for that. I try to tell people nicely that they would be better off not being my friend but some people don't listen.
Steelfox is offline  
post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-31-2011, 06:38 PM
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 33
That hasn't happened since elementary school. Nowadays, it's me desperately searching for someone who actually wants to spend time with me, usually to no avail.
Snowy Glow is offline  
Reply

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Feel like a total crappy friend to a friend of mine aviator99 Frustration 5 12-15-2014 11:29 PM
I feel bad for people who are interested in being my friend or girlfriend. Torment Coping With Social Anxiety 11 02-27-2013 07:22 PM
Friend is not who I thought he was/feel bad DCP11OC Frustration 1 07-11-2010 07:42 PM
ignore everyone and everything feel good, talk to people again, feel bad TheJoker Coping With Social Anxiety 13 07-07-2010 09:32 PM
if you are friendless, how bad you want the friend? Gerard Coping With Social Anxiety 24 10-15-2006 06:46 PM

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome