If you're doing CBT, then you will know that you are committing a whole raft of thinking errors:
"I am like the only one who has this type of anxiety and all other people choose freely how they live their lives, based on how they want to live it, not based on anxiety"
All or nothing thinking; Mind reading; Overgeneralisation; Hidden error: SHOULD STATEMENT - "I should not suffer anxiety". You should, because you do.
but then I realize that the other people dont come along because of "real" reasons, like they dont have any money or they have prior engagements,
labelling; magnification of others qualities; mimisation of yours; They may also be accomplished fibbers ... You are also disqualifying the positive - that your friends DO want to see you.
and this is where the thought pops up with a great feeling of anxiety and jealousy (i think), maybe its a feeling of inferiority.
You have anxiety. This much is a fact. You should be anxious, because you are
anxious. Some people have anxiety (like all the people on this board) and some people don't. You do, but you are making progress and growing stronger.
If we take your belief up there a little further, it becomes:
"I should not feel anxious. Other people do not feel anxious and this makes me inferior. I should be sparkling and glittering. If I am inferior I can not be worthwhile or loveable. If I am unloveable I will be alone and I will suffer pain. If I live my life according to anxiety then it is not my life. I have no control and things will happen that are bad."
Work on that one with the thinking errors. Use the 3 column technique to try to come up with rational alternatives, challenging the statements. rememebr - you're a detective - see how much cr*p you can detect in those negative thoughts ...
Remember - the aim is to turn a demand
into a rational preference.