Are you in an embarrassing situation because of SA or lack of a social life? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 12:03 PM Thread Starter
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Are you in an embarrassing situation because of SA or lack of a social life?


I live in a small apartment building with only a couple of units. There are only a couple other people besides me in my building. We all are in separate units. But since the building is so small (just the size or a large house) we can hear each other's comings and goings. I can always hear them going out with their friends and their friends coming over to visit. They all have friends or family or something, except for me. I've only had people over like once or twice over the last couple of years.

I feel so embarrassed that all the other neighbors realize at this point that I have no friends and no social life.

I'm always worried I will run into them and they will ask what I'm doing this weekend or my plans for the summer. Because I have no plans. None that involve other people that is. And I find this terribly embarrassing.

I hate always going around being embarrassed like this. I wish I could afford my own house so I didn't have to deal with it.


I've been out haunting the neighborhood
And everybody can see I'm no good
When I'm walking out between parked cars
With my head full of stars
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post #2 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 02:44 PM
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post #3 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 03:21 PM
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I'm a bit embarrassed that I got owned in that thread

also my phone always writes but when i want to write bit. I guess it would do that if I had SA or not though.

mostly my life is glorious and I treat people like bugs (I mean gross and possibly poisonous bugs, theres some fear in it). I feel a bit bad about that sometimes but it seems like I need to in order to live without all that embarrassment. actually I often treat bugs better than people. except for the few people I care about who are definitely people and not bugs.

at work I need to go to the bathroom sometimes but the line is running and I cant really leave? if I do everyone knows, and I ought to tell someone etc so mostly I just stay there and my tummy makes audible noises. embarrassing.

I wont say I'm embarrassed about certain facts of my life but certainly guarded. other people would probably be embarrassed. but they dont have my bug strategy lol. my job situation is... it is what it is and I dont want to compare myself to people, because again, bugs. I had career aspirations though and of course I'd like my life to be more comfortable.

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post #4 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 04:57 PM
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I would actually like to live alone without anyone coming over and such... I don't feel embarrassed about that... Even though I don't like telling anyone about that I don't have any friends and don't do anything on weekends and my life is just the same crap all over and over again...

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post #5 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 06:09 PM
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I've felt this many times in my life to the point I can't leave or enter my home without panic. It has made me gravitate towards living in large apartment buildings where you feel more anonymous in your comings and goings.
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post #6 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 07:33 PM
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I'd say my situation's pretty embarrassing. I'm not sure how much I can pin on my social anxiety versus my overall failure to human. I guess that's like trying to tell where a snake's body ends and its tail begins.

I kind of hate going into detail about myself, because there's nothing good to tell frankly. I live with my parents. I sometimes attempt to do productive things, but mostly, I just rot. I very rarely go out in public, because I can't handle having to face people. I don't like even being seen by anyone. Feels like I must just emanate worthlessness, and there's no way of hiding it. I feel it must be just about dripping from every word I write even, you know? Absurdly pathetic is probably one of the kinder ways I could describe myself.

But anyway, that's enough of an excursion through self-pity city for one day.
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post #7 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 07:41 PM
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There are only 8 units in this building (2 entrances, 5 units on this side) so you do kind of know who is who. I just try to avoid running into people in the building. Though it's inevitable that you run into them once in a while. Most don't attempt to talk to me except for the Rastafarian who lives below me. He's a gasbag and talks to everyone in the building and the neighboring buildings too.

Anyways, your neighbors don't know what you do when you leave the house. For all they know, you could have a fantastic social life outside the house but just never invite anyone over.
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post #8 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-14-2020, 08:30 PM
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Everything about me combines into a great bit cluster of crap that makes me just not want to be seen by anyone. Most of the SA is because of other stuff, rather than other stuff being caused by SA. I don't really GAF about having a social life (or not having one, rather). That doesn't embarrass me in the slightest.

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post #9 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-15-2020, 12:39 PM
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I used to be terribly embarrassed about it, especially when I started working and colleagues would regularly ask about what I had done on weekends or during annual leave (absolutely nothing to be precise!).

Plus I knew they could guess by just looking at me and my insecurities that I had very little life experience!

In addition to that it became really physically painful being constantly reminded about what I was missing out on.

I just grinned and bore it!

Luckily people's inquiries became less probing over the years. Especially when I had better mixtures of older and younger colleagues!

When I eventually managed doing tiny activities from my mid-thirties on, I would sometimes pimp them up a bit or throw them in on occasions. (Which does not come naturally to me!)

It got better from there and most of the time I manage to find my niche in groups now somehow.
And I made my peace with how I fear I might come across.
Well, at least to a point that's bearable.

I think, there's really worse things that people should really be embarrassed about themselves than our possible miserable/boring life or inabilities!!!
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post #10 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-15-2020, 06:43 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coldmorning View Post
I've felt this many times in my life to the point I can't leave or enter my home without panic. It has made me gravitate towards living in large apartment buildings where you feel more anonymous in your comings and goings.
I'd rather live in a large building myself but they are more expensive (around here at least) and also you can get noisy inconsiderate neighbors. Your neighbors tend to be quieter in smaller buildings. Plus I hate carpet its so gross everything gets caught in it and all the chemicals they use to make it and normally large buildings all have carpet. What I'd really like is my own cabin in the woods!

I hear you about the panic when leaving or coming home. I usually walk to or from my car very briskly so it looks like i'm really busy and in a hurry to tend to my oh so busy and important life. Actually I'm just trying to avoid everyone.




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Originally Posted by komorikun View Post
There are only 8 units in this building (2 entrances, 5 units on this side) so you do kind of know who is who. I just try to avoid running into people in the building. Though it's inevitable that you run into them once in a while. Most don't attempt to talk to me except for the Rastafarian who lives below me. He's a gasbag and talks to everyone in the building and the neighboring buildings too.

Anyways, your neighbors don't know what you do when you leave the house. For all they know, you could have a fantastic social life outside the house but just never invite anyone over.
I try to avoid as much as I can too. Usually listen to hear if anyone is outside, maybe peep out the window. I can do that before I leave but can't really do anything when coming home. I came home once last fall and all the other neighbors were on the front stoop. They all watched me park and get out of my car. There was no avoiding them then. My heart sank when I saw them all lol. Then I had to sit out there with them for like 30 mins and act like I wanted to catch up so as not to appear rude. At least they had refreshments and I got a beer out of it.

I have a neighbor who is also a notorious and enormous bag of gas. Anytime someone from another building is outside I can hear her run to her window to see who it is then run outside to talk to them. She's on the 2nd floor, I'm on the first, but whenever someone knocks on the front door (sometimes they don't ring our bells) she runs down to open the door and talk to them. I've never opened the door for anyone even though I'm closest.


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Originally Posted by WillYouStopDave View Post
Everything about me combines into a great bit cluster of crap that makes me just not want to be seen by anyone. Most of the SA is because of other stuff, rather than other stuff being caused by SA. I don't really GAF about having a social life (or not having one, rather). That doesn't embarrass me in the slightest.
Yes, I also do not like to be seen lol. Not only do I want to avoid you, I also don't even want you to know I exist. I wish I wasn't embarrassed by it like you. But I'm mortified. I care so much about what others think.

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Originally Posted by GermanHermit View Post
I used to be terribly embarrassed about it, especially when I started working and colleagues would regularly ask about what I had done on weekends or during annual leave (absolutely nothing to be precise!).

Plus I knew they could guess by just looking at me and my insecurities that I had very little life experience!

In addition to that it became really physically painful being constantly reminded about what I was missing out on.

I just grinned and bore it!
Ahhh yes the old "how was your weekend, what did you do?" - hate it. Either have to make something up or fumble around or just be like "ahh was so busy had too much had to take care of, nothing fun blah blah". That is embarrassing too. Over time though eventually they will figure you out and realize you have no social life and that's eve more embarrassing.


I've been out haunting the neighborhood
And everybody can see I'm no good
When I'm walking out between parked cars
With my head full of stars
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post #11 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-15-2020, 07:06 PM
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My current roommate works alot and is gone for most of the day, so she probably wouldn't even have much of a way to directly know if I have friends over and if any, since we barely see eachother. It wouldn't be a surprise if it still comes off indirectly that I'm a loner, however..Such as through my general demeanor and all. (And how the only person who ever visits me and calls me is my mom, constantly... )



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post #12 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-18-2020, 05:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by either/or View Post
I'm always worried I will run into them and they will ask what I'm doing this weekend or my plans for the summer. Because I have no plans. None that involve other people that is. And I find this terribly embarrassing.
In the apartments where I live people don't really speak to each other so it might be a bit alarming if someone came out and asked me what I was up to . I've spoken to one neighbor and we both got along great because of our beliefs. It makes sense for acquaintances, co-workers and family to ask such questions but I believe there is a different standard for strangers or those you haven't spoken more than a few sentences to.

And... Guess where the fingers will point if there is a noise complaint? It can't be the resident who rarely has guests over! There's no where for a rowdy tenant to shift the blame if they have a large party and cause some ruckus! Landlords will love a quiet person who follows all the rules - I say as long as I please them my life is golden and a neighbor's opinion about me personally won't matter.

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What I'd really like is my own cabin in the woods!
I'm sensitive to noise and the thought of wanting to live on a farm in the country sometimes comes to mind. Some people go on cruises or head into a popular city but I wonder if a week of country living would be more relaxing...

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Originally Posted by either/or View Post
Ahhh yes the old "how was your weekend, what did you do?" - hate it. Either have to make something up or fumble around or just be like "ahh was so busy had too much had to take care of, nothing fun blah blah". That is embarrassing too. Over time though eventually they will figure you out and realize you have no social life and that's eve more embarrassing.
What's wrong with saying, "Actually I didn't do much - do you know of any fun places to go out to?"

or "I don't really have anyone to hang out with - do you know anyone who is into ___ ?"

Since your neighbors are the type to chat with each other (going so far as to offer beers), they seem like the friendly type who could offer suggestions. But if they are judging you so harshly that they don't see you as a worthy person who deserves any respect (or that you're just a joke to point and jeer at) I don't see why you'd want to hang out with them for 30 minutes anyway outside of greetings and quick small talk. I don't know which way they are acting towards you but if they are kind, then you don't have to worry about avoiding them. It sounds like the picture you have of them in your mind is worse than reality.

Life is unpredictable and relationships aren't as stable as they appear to be. Maybe it seems like everyone has an endless supply of social connections to call on anytime but its also possible for people to exit your life just as often as they come into it. People move to be closer to family, obtain a job, study out of state, flee undesirable circumstances - the list can go on and on. If someone has a group of best friends that they've had since high school they are BLESSED and may not even know it . Gratefulness is what they should be feeling, not contempt for whatever social connections you don't have at the moment.

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Not only do I want to avoid you, I also don't even want you to know I exist.
I bought a welcome mat from Walmart so my cover has been blown

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post #13 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-18-2020, 07:49 PM
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I'm embarrassed to be a human, because the people in my environment has not free will to socialize. The people that I'm surrounded by "lack the mentality" to know how, who, what or when to socially interact with me or others. In this case the people tend so show no signs of perceptual awareness whatsoever to know the situation that they're in. The mentality simply doesn't resonate with the people at the current time, as if someone blank out all traces of their thoughts ever existing when communicating with another human being.

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post #14 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-19-2020, 05:24 AM
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The stock answer to "What have you been up to?" is "Ah, nothing much, just chilling". It works because:
1) It might mean you don't want to talk about your personal life, and at least in the UK people will generally respect that.
2) It means you're a chill guy.
3) Everybody loves to chill, so it's something nearly everyone understands and approves of.
4) It could mean anything at all.

When you're a quiet neighbour, people generally assume you're hardworking. That or a serial killer (so saying a non-committal hello every so often helps).

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post #15 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-20-2020, 09:58 AM
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just be unique and special and if anyone asks whats the problem with noone coming to you just tell em its your private space and you like it special and only with special ppl and you meet people in other places not at home. just pretend you are really special. thats all


and theres nothing to be ashamed of, ppl have different habits with inviting ppl at home





also people are stupid, instead of surprising yu with inviting yu to join them or something interesting they will just yap somekinda nuisance about that youre loner or whatever. as if loners arent specialer ppl than theyr normal regular ***
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post #16 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-21-2020, 11:59 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
In the apartments where I live people don't really speak to each other so it might be a bit alarming if someone came out and asked me what I was up to . I've spoken to one neighbor and we both got along great because of our beliefs. It makes sense for acquaintances, co-workers and family to ask such questions but I believe there is a different standard for strangers or those you haven't spoken more than a few sentences to.

And... Guess where the fingers will point if there is a noise complaint? It can't be the resident who rarely has guests over! There's no where for a rowdy tenant to shift the blame if they have a large party and cause some ruckus! Landlords will love a quiet person who follows all the rules - I say as long as I please them my life is golden and a neighbor's opinion about me personally won't matter.

You're lucky then. I only have 4 neighbors in my building, 1 keeps to herself but the other 2 are constantly trying to socialize. Because its such a small building everyone knows each others business. I like to keep my distance from neighbors but I'm usually open with most other acquaintances. I guess because this is my home so I don't like them to keep tabs on me. I hate the fact that they always see me here cause I never leave and they can tell I have no life. FML.


Ha, if there is a noise complaint its prob against me bc I am constantly playing music. Tho you are right I don't have parties obvs. Once I did have to call on my neighbor because she had drunk people being loud outside my door at like 2 AM on a Tuesday.


Quote:
Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
I'm sensitive to noise and the thought of wanting to live on a farm in the country sometimes comes to mind. Some people go on cruises or head into a popular city but I wonder if a week of country living would be more relaxing...

I am sensitive to other's ppl's noise for sure but not in general, I like loud music and like hearing the nearby train go by. But yah the country has its own appeal, to just hear the wind blow or the birds or whatever and no foul humans. I go hiking up in the mountains all the time and love it, so peaceful and serene.


Quote:
Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
What's wrong with saying, "Actually I didn't do much - do you know of any fun places to go out to?"

or "I don't really have anyone to hang out with - do you know anyone who is into ___ ?"

Because I'm scared of people lol. And most people don't share the same interests as me and they're all busy with their family etc. Also, I feel they would perceive my questions as a form of weakness and hold it against me.



Quote:
Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
Since your neighbors are the type to chat with each other (going so far as to offer beers), they seem like the friendly type who could offer suggestions. But if they are judging you so harshly that they don't see you as a worthy person who deserves any respect (or that you're just a joke to point and jeer at) I don't see why you'd want to hang out with them for 30 minutes anyway outside of greetings and quick small talk. I don't know which way they are acting towards you but if they are kind, then you don't have to worry about avoiding them. It sounds like the picture you have of them in your mind is worse than reality.

Life is unpredictable and relationships aren't as stable as they appear to be. Maybe it seems like everyone has an endless supply of social connections to call on anytime but its also possible for people to exit your life just as often as they come into it. People move to be closer to family, obtain a job, study out of state, flee undesirable circumstances - the list can go on and on. If someone has a group of best friends that they've had since high school they are BLESSED and may not even know it . Gratefulness is what they should be feeling, not contempt for whatever social connections you don't have at the moment.

They are friendly, they aren't mean. I just feel embarrassed anyway. They all seem to have lives and social connections of some sort which I lack. So its like I'm on a different planet - people like that don't get people like me, they probably do not even know SA exists.



I did have a group of friends from HS, we were pretty close actually, but we all just drifted in different directions, they've all started families and I can't because I'm me. So I was blessed but not anymore. People change and I couldn't keep up with the changes.


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Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
I bought a welcome mat from Walmart so my cover has been blown
I should buy one that says "screw off!" ; )


I've been out haunting the neighborhood
And everybody can see I'm no good
When I'm walking out between parked cars
With my head full of stars
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post #17 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-25-2020, 05:02 PM
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I should buy one that says "screw off!" ; )

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post #18 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-25-2020, 05:28 PM
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Also, I feel they would perceive my questions as a form of weakness and hold it against me.
How do you envision a scene playing out where the worst possible situation may occur? Maybe this thread can be used to roleplay that most feared scenario, discuss your thought process and comment on it.

If you want you can fill in the dialogue blanks and write in your "story" of the worst case scenario:

After several days, you finally leave your apartment to complete a small errand. Upon your return, you walk across the parking lot (luckily it's empty) and head in the direction of your unit. You enter the hallway and see a neighbor - they just closed and locked their door and turn to see you standing there. [What happens next?]

neighbor:

either/or:

neighbor:

either/or:

etc.

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post #19 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-26-2020, 06:55 AM
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Originally Posted by GermanHermit View Post
I used to be terribly embarrassed about it, especially when I started working and colleagues would regularly ask about what I had done on weekends or during annual leave (absolutely nothing to be precise!).

Plus I knew they could guess by just looking at me and my insecurities that I had very little life experience!

In addition to that it became really physically painful being constantly reminded about what I was missing out on.

I just grinned and bore it!

Luckily people's inquiries became less probing over the years. Especially when I had better mixtures of older and younger colleagues!

When I eventually managed doing tiny activities from my mid-thirties on, I would sometimes pimp them up a bit or throw them in on occasions. (Which does not come naturally to me!)

It got better from there and most of the time I manage to find my niche in groups now somehow.
And I made my peace with how I fear I might come across.
Well, at least to a point that's bearable.

I think, there's really worse things that people should really be embarrassed about themselves than our possible miserable/boring life or inabilities!!!

I feel that!
I'm very embarrassed about my non-existent love life. But at the same time I have really good things going on in my life, and I feel like should focus on being proud of them rather than the embarrassing part. And I agree with you, that are mean, arrogant people out there, they should be embarrassed, not us, right?
And even knowing that, I can't stop but feel embarrassed, and I wish the feeling would go away.

I'm really happy you made peace with yourself! All the love!
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post #20 of 26 (permalink) Old 06-27-2020, 04:34 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fire mage64 View Post
How do you envision a scene playing out where the worst possible situation may occur? Maybe this thread can be used to roleplay that most feared scenario, discuss your thought process and comment on it.

If you want you can fill in the dialogue blanks and write in your "story" of the worst case scenario:

After several days, you finally leave your apartment to complete a small errand. Upon your return, you walk across the parking lot (luckily it's empty) and head in the direction of your unit. You enter the hallway and see a neighbor - they just closed and locked their door and turn to see you standing there. [What happens next?]

Well this is a very interesting and novel approach. Could be fun. Let give it a whirl.



What I think is going to happen:


neighbor: Hey Buddy, what's up? Haven't seen you in a while, what have you been up to?

either/or: *gulps* *turns bright red* * begins to sweat* * neck muscle and vocal chords become tight* *heart races* *brain turns to mush* I'm just alive in my apartment. I mean not doing much. Because I'm not up to anything. Yah. I mean everything is OK. I'm not weird. What was the question?

neighbor: Ahem, OK. Cool story bro.

either/or: *passes out*


What will probably happen:


neighbor: Hey Buddy, what's up? Haven't seen you in a while, what have you been up to?

either/or: *gulps* *turns bright red* * begins to sweat* Not much man, just chillen out mainly. Got a ton of **** to take care of too, you know, busy a lot. You been good? Good man. Well anyway gonna run got **** to get done

neighbor: Yah, good talken to ya, take care dude.

either/or: Later man.


What I wish would happen:


neighbor: Hey Buddy, what's up? Haven't seen you in a while, what have you been up to?

either/or: Not much man - Jack White's putting on a show next month totally want to go but don't know anyone who wants to go.

neighbor: LETS GO! HE'S THE MAN! YOU'RE A RIGHTEOUS DUDE! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS?!

either/or: Let's do this!


I've been out haunting the neighborhood
And everybody can see I'm no good
When I'm walking out between parked cars
With my head full of stars
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