I certainly vary in my social abilities. This depends a lot on my mood. I never feel as fluent as I should be, there are always "the brakes" on, i think. Something stopping me from feeling fluent.
But with the new job coming up, there will be a lot of social interaction, and I feel if I am able to get in there and do it (and overcome my other health issues, like inability to sleep) for long enough, I will actually get there. I have the ability to be somewhat charming, in a quiet way (I see it sometimes when I make videos), but its a real drag to get that to come out in social situations. It's there, buried deep, but I can get in the zone if I can create the right supportive environment and opportunities to expose.
The key for me, quite simply is exposure, frequent enough repeated enough. Last week I did two interviews, its the first time I have done two in a week. The first day my anxiety was down at a 7/10 (which in itself is insane, since I have been strongly phobic of them for many years and never thought i would even be able to do one), the next day, 4/10, which is basically a level I can operate at for a long time.
It's just extremely difficult to:
1. Get social situations that last long enough to cause extinction (interviews, interestingly are perfect, as they last 30 mins to an hour, which means anxiety can reduce significantly during) - but you need to build up to that with mock interviews, and other similar situations.
2. Be in a good enough mood to be able to handle the critical voice that comes before, and after exposures
3. Get social situations that occur often enough to cement the extinction
4. Do all of this when stuck inside your house (lol apocalypse).
So its really the mechanics, and controlling mood and critical self-talk, as well as making sure there is support and things are in place to promote the ability to expose etc.
"The zone" is there, underneath, just digging it out is taking insane amounts of work. Am pretty sure the people around me are (probably unconsciously) filling the hole back in behind my back (that's hard to explain).