24, single, live at home.... - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 01:48 PM Thread Starter
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24, single, live at home....


...............And dont really have a social life :/ I do have the off friend, but we dont have that much in common when it comes to going out, she loves to 'party' etc and I'm just not into it anymore. I sometimes feel ok about wanting to stay in and be alone because i really dont mind it, but there are times like now for instance, where I feel like an utter loser who has NO life. I think my mum and dad must also think i am abnormal for not going out etc. Work is bad too i have been signed off with depression because i also have OCD (pure o) if anyone knows what that is. I am scared to go back and because i hate being around other people i am not comfortable with and always think they are patronizing me or again think i am a 'loser'
Is there anyone else out there who is similar to me??
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post #2 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 01:50 PM
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Nearly 90% of people in this site are similar to you ; ) .
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post #3 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:01 PM
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Yeah I can relate a lot. I'm 22 myself and I have practically very little social life and suffer from depression etc. Just want to remind you that you are in no way a loser. Don't let nobody tell you that you're a loser, and don't tell yourself that. You are struggling with this disorder just like us, and you need help to get better. I can totally feel you that it gets depressing. It's unavoidable unfortunately, but there's steps you can take to overcome this, or should I say recover from it.
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post #4 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:17 PM
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Yeah to all but living at parents, I live by myself. I don't go out at all, not really my thing to go to clubs and stuff. Its just not fun. I've got one friend who I hang out with about every other weekend because he lives about 40 miles away where my parents used to live. I can relate to feeling like a loser sometimes to, but then remember that I really don't have any fun doing the stuff that most people consider fun lol. Going out to a club or party and spending **** tons of money to stand around with abunch of people I barely know just isn't that great to me lol. I do love getting high though haha
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post #5 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:23 PM
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I'm 36, single, and live at home with my parents...though I haven't a job or any friends to hang out with and haven't had any since the Nineties. :/ I also have OCD. Yes, I feel abnormal, but I'm mostly okay with being at home all the time since I'm quite introverted...it'd be nice to have a friend or two IRL to just talk with about shared interests, though.

There are many on this site much similar to you.

If I don't reply to you, it's NOTHING PERSONAL. It's my ANXIETY.

***

(Devetko's boyfriend Stan Brooks & Det. Reichert are horsing around.)

Det. Kristeva: "If it were legal you'd marry me, right?"
Det. Devetko: "Definitely."

(It's legal now!! But Kristeva's already married. ;_; )

***

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post #6 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:39 PM
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Another single 24 year old living at home here
Welcooooome!

I am going to completely work on making myself happy.

“Fear can make you do more wrong than hate or jealousy. If you're afraid you don’t commit yourself to life completely; fear makes you always, always hold something back.”
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post #7 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:48 PM
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As Psi said above - none of you are losers. We're all trying to live our lives with a pretty big handicap - if we weren't our lives would be very different.

You're among friends here.
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post #8 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:49 PM
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Another single 24 year old living at home here
Welcooooome!
Hey
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post #9 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 02:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ariel24 View Post
...............And dont really have a social life :/ I do have the off friend, but we dont have that much in common when it comes to going out, she loves to 'party' etc and I'm just not into it anymore. I sometimes feel ok about wanting to stay in and be alone because i really dont mind it, but there are times like now for instance, where I feel like an utter loser who has NO life. I think my mum and dad must also think i am abnormal for not going out etc. Work is bad too i have been signed off with depression because i also have OCD (pure o) if anyone knows what that is. I am scared to go back and because i hate being around other people i am not comfortable with and always think they are patronizing me or again think i am a 'loser'
Is there anyone else out there who is similar to me??
Yea. I can relate.
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post #10 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 04:23 PM
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Hi I'm 28, single, living at home too. I lived with room mates when I went to University, but really was on my own mostly as I didn't exactly gel with some room mates. I do have a friend I hang out with from time to time. I'm fortunate because he has been patient with me and stood by me through some rough times. Where other people I used to call friends just got frustrated and left because they didn't understand my issues at all. I've tired to stand by my best friend and his wife, though I'll admit anxiety has gotten the better of me sometimes. I do work part time and honestly even though it's only part time I'm happy to be working at all. As it gets me out meeting with new people which I think has helped a bit with my anxiety as I'm getting more used to people. Also it has allowed me to communicate with the opposite sex, make friends with them, and even attempt to flirt with them and ask them out. Though I'll admit that has definitely been rocky for me and I still get really anxious when talking to girls I like. Not one for the club and bar scene either but I'll go to Boston pizza or to a pub with my friend if say there is a UFC fight or big hockey game on. My parents used to badger me more about getting out more but since both me and my sister have been diagnosed with anxiety /depression they have realized they need to support us not badger us. Though before my first major panic attack it was pretty rough with them.

Just know that you are not alone in this fight. Most people don't realize just how much it takes for us to even walk out the door some days. Some people might consider us head cases but if they had to walk a mile in our shoes I doubt most of them would be able to make it half as far as we have.
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post #11 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 04:59 PM
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post #12 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 05:46 PM
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post #13 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 06:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sin View Post
have tried you meeting people off sas?
Do you mean other SASers, or just meeting people IRL...?

Either way...I have no transportation and live in a really isolated area. There's nobody around here to meet. I've met my online friend a couple of times and had fun, but she lives in another state.

If I don't reply to you, it's NOTHING PERSONAL. It's my ANXIETY.

***

(Devetko's boyfriend Stan Brooks & Det. Reichert are horsing around.)

Det. Kristeva: "If it were legal you'd marry me, right?"
Det. Devetko: "Definitely."

(It's legal now!! But Kristeva's already married. ;_; )

***

"No canoes...no maple sugar...this place is horribly uncivilized."--Manabozho, Escape From Manitou Island
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post #14 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 06:05 PM
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I'm going to be 30 this year, you still have a while to go life doesn't end at 24.

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post #15 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-11-2013, 06:28 PM
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Im 25 living at home, single, fear of getting a job due to my SA and the combination of all these often has me feeling like im failing at life and that im never going to succeed in doing many of the things I would like to do (even the easier things at times), so yeah, youre not alone!
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post #16 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-12-2013, 12:46 PM Thread Starter
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wow thanks for all the replys people.. I know 24 isnt THAT old but when everyone around you is settling down or at least have a boyfriend, i dont even really want a bf though its just everyone ALWAYS asks me all the time, it really bugs me, its like people can actually like being single you know!!
I'm actually learning to drive which i think is a step forward, SO glad i do not mind my driving instructor he isnt intimidating or anything but it still doesnt stop me dreading EVERY lesson and feeling so nervous, not about driving but i get anxious about if i dont have anything to say to him ( i know that sounds stupid ) another thing does any1 worry about the future? i often worry i wont get a decent job ever and will have no money to even afford a home of my own, and it sometimes really keeps me up at night!
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post #17 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-12-2013, 02:05 PM
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God those parties always sucked. Ahh.
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post #18 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-12-2013, 02:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ariel24 View Post
wow thanks for all the replys people.. I know 24 isnt THAT old but when everyone around you is settling down or at least have a boyfriend, i dont even really want a bf though its just everyone ALWAYS asks me all the time, it really bugs me, its like people can actually like being single you know!!
I'm actually learning to drive which i think is a step forward, SO glad i do not mind my driving instructor he isnt intimidating or anything but it still doesnt stop me dreading EVERY lesson and feeling so nervous, not about driving but i get anxious about if i dont have anything to say to him ( i know that sounds stupid ) another thing does any1 worry about the future? i often worry i wont get a decent job ever and will have no money to even afford a home of my own, and it sometimes really keeps me up at night!
Again I can relate to all that. I learned to drive approx 5 years ago now and havent owned a car since! Like you I feared every lesson, even though I passed my test on 2nd attempt which is quite a success considering my high levels of anxiety. Unfortunately the SA has held me back from getting a "proper" stable job to allow me to get my own car, now I kinda fear driving due to lack of experience as well .

Probably my biggest fear is what you have described, the future. Unless I can get over the SA involved in finding work and keeping work I wonder how I am ever going to become independant, move out of parents home and live a mature life!
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post #19 of 21 (permalink) Old 06-02-2013, 06:40 AM
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I have a job and still can't afford to move out because I didn't get the luxury to be born in the US or whatever first world country. It's very frustrating. God I hate my second world country.
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post #20 of 21 (permalink) Old 06-02-2013, 06:44 AM
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I'm 22, single, living at home, don't have a car or a driving licence, and I recently lost my job (yet again) because I wasn't good at it. I don't really know what I'm good at doing or what I even want to do. Apart from walking my dog, I NEVER go out.
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