Hi SAS. Nice to be here. - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 10:08 AM Thread Starter
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Hi SAS. Nice to be here.


Hi SAS, it's nice to be here, I just created an account today.👋👋

I had an account here I think maybe 3,4 or 5 years ago(?) but I don't recall much about it. I do remember I was struggling just to interact here without nearly flipping out on people, but I've grown a bit since then.

Anyway, I suffer from terrible social anxiety, I've had it all my life. A psychiatrist diagnosed it as SA as well, so it's not just me saying it. To be honest with you, over the years I've done a lot reading/research about this condition and, although I haven't been officially diagnosed, I'm certain my mindset is that of the Avoidant Personality Disorder - a deep-seated, severe, and quite unshakable form of social anxiety. It's been a curse on my life and lead me to despair and to the brink of suicide.

It's a daily struggle, or should I say a daily self-management, and to cut a long story short, in order to keep my sanity, I'm now practically a recluse. That's why the internet, for me, is a great tool - a tool to feel connected to the world and also it just helps in keeping my mind occupied as well, as I'm not required to hold a job. Very thankful for my doctors and for my country's support.

I like to go for walks, to enjoy nature, but even that proves an effin challenge, even on meds, and today was no exception. That's why I joined today.

Good to be among kindred spirits and to know I'm not alone in these very trying lives we've been given.

Thank you.🙏
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post #2 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 11:24 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Sandrik View Post
Hi.
I also had an account some years ago and can not remember it. This place seems to have changed some.

Welcome - Hopefully you find what you need this time!
Thanks Sandrik, much appreciated. 🙏
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post #3 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 11:36 AM
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Welcome back!x

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post #4 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 11:44 AM Thread Starter
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Welcome back!x
Thanks RSxo, appreciated. It's a pretty good site really.🙏
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post #5 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 12:40 PM
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Welcome, @john.myles .

Do you remember what your old account's username is?
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post #6 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 03:23 PM Thread Starter
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Welcome, @john.myles .

Do you remember what your old account's username is?
Hi, thank you.🙏

No, can't remember the username.
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post #7 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 07:46 PM
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hi john.myles, I see that you're back. Welcome back! Yes it gets lonely when you have SA but there are still nice times you can have.
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post #8 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 08:43 PM
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Hi John! I like to go for walks too, as I get a lot of peace and perspective outdoors in nature, but I know what it's like for even that to be a challenge. Anyhow, welcome.

Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift, but most of the time it does.
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post #9 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 09:26 PM Thread Starter
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Thank you very much both @lily and @CoolLilChickadee . Really appreciated, thanks.🌻🌼

You know, even at this level of social media(?) it's comforting to read your welcoming posts and to know I'm talking to people who know the sting of SA and of loneliness, too. You're right, there are some good things around us if we're able to appreciate it. Thank you both for your welcomes. 🙏🙏

It's a sunny day here so I'm about to head outside for a walk to nature and back. I'm mentally prepared so fingers crossed for a nice walk.🌞🤞
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post #10 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-13-2020, 11:06 PM
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I hope you have a nice walk and you're welcome.
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post #11 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 01:09 AM Thread Starter
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I hope you have a nice walk and you're welcome.
Thank you. My walk went pretty well, on the whole. Nice weather today too.

Sending good vibes your way.🙏🌠🌠
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post #12 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 06:26 AM
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Welcome back to SAS. I hope you’ll like it.

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post #13 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 06:50 AM Thread Starter
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Welcome back to SAS. I hope you’ll like it.
Thank you Silent Memory, much appreciated.🙏

I think I will like it here really, because of the whole social anxiety focus of the site. I'm feeling a need to be more open about it...

Thank you, friend.🌞
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post #14 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 12:16 PM
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Originally Posted by john.myles View Post
Hi SAS, it's nice to be here, I just created an account today.👋👋

I had an account here I think maybe 3,4 or 5 years ago(?) but I don't recall much about it. I do remember I was struggling just to interact here without nearly flipping out on people, but I've grown a bit since then.

Anyway, I suffer from terrible social anxiety, I've had it all my life. A psychiatrist diagnosed it as SA as well, so it's not just me saying it. To be honest with you, over the years I've done a lot reading/research about this condition and, although I haven't been officially diagnosed, I'm certain my mindset is that of the Avoidant Personality Disorder - a deep-seated, severe, and quite unshakable form of social anxiety. It's been a curse on my life and lead me to despair and to the brink of suicide.

It's a daily struggle, or should I say a daily self-management, and to cut a long story short, in order to keep my sanity, I'm now practically a recluse. That's why the internet, for me, is a great tool - a tool to feel connected to the world and also it just helps in keeping my mind occupied as well, as I'm not required to hold a job. Very thankful for my doctors and for my country's support.
Welcome back. So do you have a job or go to school which forces you to interact with people?

I think to improve your SA you have to get experience interacting with people. A mistake I made when I was younger was just reading about the disorder. But you actually have to take risks and put yourself out their in order to improve. Just understanding SA from book point of view does not really reduce your fear.

So set small social goals everyday. Start small. Say hi to someone and look them in the eye. Then try to start a conversation would be the next step. Then talking to a group of people would be the next one after that. Not easy to do but that is how you improve. Medication or therapy can help to reduce your fear and get you started
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post #15 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 12:53 PM
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Originally Posted by john.myles View Post
Thank you. My walk went pretty well, on the whole. Nice weather today too.

Sending good vibes your way.🙏🌠🌠
hehe, thank you!
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post #16 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-14-2020, 01:17 PM Thread Starter
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Hey there @chrisinmd . Thanks for your reply friend, I do appreciate where you're coming from.👍

I've actually been working on my SA since 1998 (22 years) which is when I first started addressing all of my problems together (addiction, anxiety and depression) and on the surface I actually interact pretty well with people - and that's because of the hard work I put into carrying myself the best I can. But my therapists knew my inner struggles and also my doctors know.

I don't really want to go into details right now, but to cut a long story short, I've addressed my issues from all angles available - all except consulting a witch doctor and the gypsy with a crystal ball - and I've even had someone I know say 'there's nothing wrong with you'. Wow, what great progress I must be making! But I'd just like to assure you it's still a struggle and in fact it got very much worse over the years. For a few years I actually lost my mind, psychotic, so much so that two years ago I was going to kill myself - all except for an act of, I'll say, 'divine providence' which saved me. Yes, divine providence, nothing else.

I still challenge myself daily though, and I'll put more of my experiences out there as time goes by, which is one of the reasons I joined this good site, but for now I'm happier being reclusive because I'm burned out by all this. Very much so. I'm like a shadow in the night...

Thanks for taking the time to help me though, chrisinmd. You have a good heart, my friend.🙏
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post #17 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-15-2020, 05:27 PM
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Welcome back to the forum! I hope it helps you.

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post #18 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-16-2020, 01:38 AM Thread Starter
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Welcome back to the forum! I hope it helps you.

Thank you, Sir. 🙏

Yes, at the very least, this site - due to it being about SA - is validating. And that's important.🙂
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post #19 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-22-2020, 12:17 PM
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Welcome back, John.

Having also come back after a few years, I do admit that it feels a bit slower paced and quiet (I have my own reasons for thinking why this may be the case), and so hopefully this will prove a more amiable experience than it perhaps was back in the day.

It's quite humbling to hear of your thankfulness for your doctors and other support that your country has given you. Hope you find this site as being another source of support.

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post #20 of 22 (permalink) Old 11-22-2020, 12:30 PM
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Hi John.Myles,

Welcome and I hope you enjoy your stay around here and this forum helps you.
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