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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-05-2020, 05:20 PM Thread Starter
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Hi


So other than my mental illness, things about me: I just graduated college. I went to school for illustration. I like documentaries and animated movies. I like books but I don't generally read novels anymore...I like things that are more informative. I'm 25. I'd really like to illustrate books or help on animated films. I'm an INFJ if anyone is into mbti.

I've been living with social anxiety for as long as I can remember. It makes it difficult to maintain friendships because I'm always under the assumption that if I haven't heard from someone in a couple of weeks, someone hasn't returned my phone calls etc that it means I've done something wrong (also have severe abandonment problems.) And then I get scared to reach out. I also was cut off from the "outside world" a lot growing up because of an abusive home environment, so I feel very out of touch with the world and I'm constantly afraid of being offensive or weird just because I'm still learning about things that seem to be common sense to other people. I was in therapy for awhile but then I couldn't afford it.

Anyway, that was longer than I had intended. I was just hoping to maybe connect with someone who understands. And sorry if I don't respond to things right away. I'm also having pretty bad depression right now.
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-05-2020, 11:27 PM
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Welcome! Is that your untitled octopus painting?

It's kind of a catch 22 because in order to make friendships last you have to be confident they still like you despite seeming hints they don't... but to be confident in friendships you need to have had them last.

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"Many people need desperately to receive this message: 'I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone.'" ― Kurt Vonnegut
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 03:28 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
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Welcome! <a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a> Is that your untitled octopus painting?

It's kind of a catch 22 because in order to make friendships last you have to be confident they still like you despite seeming hints they don't... but to be confident in friendships you need to have had them last.
Yeah, that's my octopus. I like painting animals the most.

I guess I haven't had a lot of practice with that stuff. I had friends growing up but they were mainly just at school. I wasn't allowed out a lot. I had a "friend" in high school but she was always mad at someone and I was afraid to make her mad so I just avoided having my own opinions or confronting her or anything. Anger terrifies me. I think the first actual friend I had I met when I was 17.
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 06:41 AM
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Welcome!x

<3
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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 11:40 AM
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hey untitled_painting, nice octopus, like your style. Hope to get into painting soon. should do it now since were in at home.
maybe you can show me how to paint. I got all the supplies and are just laying there.

Do you do album covers?

https://soundcloud.com/end_of_summermusic/sets/end-of-summer
Check out my music, most people think its good.
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 12:10 PM
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Hey Untitled_Painting, welcome to SAS.

Even if our scars donít match thereís no wrong you canít make better if you can figure out a way to change your mind.

And sure thereís things I regret not doing or doing. Those thoughts climb my spine like spiders, and then Iím really the stranger in my own bed,

and that ball of nervous gets pushed into every crack. Thatís whatís holding the bricks together.


- Listener
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 04:28 PM Thread Starter
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[QUOTE=RSxo;1093920583]Welcome!x[/QUOTE

Thank you ]
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 04:29 PM Thread Starter
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Hey Untitled_Painting, welcome to SAS. <a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/popcorn.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a>
Thank you
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 04:30 PM Thread Starter
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Welcome!x
Thank you
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 04-06-2020, 04:35 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by EndofSummer View Post
hey untitled_painting, nice octopus, like your style. Hope to get into painting soon. should do it now since were in at home.
maybe you can show me how to paint. I got all the supplies and are just laying there.

Do you do album covers?
I've never tried albums but I can do pretty much anything.
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