Doesn't it? Isn't it hilarious (in a f****d up way) how we know its all in our head but we still are terrified? I think it's quite funny.
Yeah, I'm happy with a lot, thankfully, but it's hard for me to acknowledge them when my anxiety overtakes and I just see all the stuff I'm not happy with. Maybe you are too, but it's hard for you to see it, what do you think?
Ei, I definitely do not believe you are not good at anything, there is no such thing, trust me. Actually, in my opinion you can't just be good at something, you can become good at something. So, when you figure out what you like to do, and what makes you happy, you can work to be good at it, in your own time and terms.
I went to college because it was what I wanted, it's my path, maybe yours isn't. And that's perfectly fine. Work on finding out what makes you happy.
And about the friends, I used to have toxic people around me and called them friends, it's better to be alone then in a situation like that. When you find people worth to be around with, you'll know it, and they will know it too.
All the best!