Finally Taking Steps
Hey what's up everyone. Wow there's other people like me having the same problems. So my social anxiety has finally reached the point of trying to do something about it.
I've had it for along time but i guess it's really starting to get to me.I have a girlfriend of 5 years and i've finally told her that this has been a big problem of mine. I'm good at hiding it because my avoidance skills are amazing. Always have some great excuse to avoid these social situations.
My girlfriend convinced me to finally see a doctor about my general health and this sa problem.It's good she is helping me with this and helped me explain to the doctor my condition(which i was nervous about). I also have a sleep apnea problem that we're dealing with now.
The doctor recently perscribed me cipralex 10mg to start taking to help this problem. Bought the perscription with no questions asked. Then started reading up on it and am pretty scared to take this stuff.
Brief history - used to do alot of drugs in high school. lot of acid, shrooms, xtacy, weed. long story short i got to the point where i had bad trips all the time and could not stand taking mind altering drugs any more. It's been over 10 years since i've had any.
Since then it's mostly alchol, cigarettes that i depend on. Alchol does great for anxiety until your in an anxious situation, then the panic sets in and look out. Palms sweating, no concentration, body stiffens up, racing heart, ackward conversations etc. Avoiding or escape number 1 priority.
I can get by talking to people but the conversation is very forced and i'm dying inside. even just walking down the street you feel like eyes are on you. It's ridiculous but hard to convince your body or brain that there not.
To sum up i'm really turned off this medication because of side efeects and future dependancy on it. I find that i'm not generally depressed but get the depression when my social anxiety occurs. Same time would like to quit my drinking and smoking issues that i rely on. I think i drink and smoke more because of my problems. i'm currently looking for more natural ways to deal with this because i feel it's just this stupid mental hump that your anxiety won't let u get over.
Some people say that the cipralex does wonders for them which is great. But some threads i read when they stop taking them they're more edgy than before. on the other hand i wonder if they will help me deal with my drinking and smoking issues that i could quit or lessen them and then wean myself off the cipralex.
I think i should tell the doctor to get me going on cbt even though my anxiety has me worried about this route.
Any feedback would be appreciated. Sorry for the long thread.