What is your biggest regret in life ? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 04:12 PM Thread Starter
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What is your biggest regret in life ?


just let it out , and you will feel better

my biggest regret in life , making children ,im just being honest i guess ,

i have two sons , i regret making them , so many times, and only lived a fast life of going to parties when i was 18 , i think that its related to my mental illness which came from working too hard ,it created a stress that never goes away:, even when they visited me in the hospital , i absolutely felt nothing but regret , if you get used to a certain lifestyle regardless how great it is , there will come a time where it gets boring , this is also why someone would retire as a musician or as a professional soccer player , not because they are getting older but because it gets boring , i just hope that my sons dont deal with this
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post #2 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 04:14 PM
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Not buying real estate back in the 80's. Would've made a fortune.
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post #3 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 05:05 PM Thread Starter
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Not buying real estate back in the 80's. Would've made a fortune.
are you foreal lol
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post #4 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 05:07 PM
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post #5 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 12:11 AM
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are you foreal lol
Yes I am. It really pisses me off actually.

Most other things have turned out alright in my life - considering the mental health problems I have. I've got a lot to be grateful for. Things could be a lot worse for me.

Why do you regret having kids? Is it because you're worried they'll have mental health problems too?
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post #6 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 04:37 AM
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post #7 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 09:15 AM
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post #8 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 01:20 PM
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Dropping out of school and wasting a decade using drugs. Should've joined the military or finished college.
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post #9 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 01:51 PM
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I have a lot of regrets, but when I think of the biggest, I come back to how I treated my parents in the late '90s. It was a combination of what I call my "OCD focus" starting to take hold, immaturity, social issues, and just being a jerk. I didn't actually feel or believe that they deserved the way I treated and talked to them, but the way I was doing things and why I was doing them fit my OCD issues (I wouldn't say this was classic or stereotypical OCD, but it's what I call it). They didn't deserve anything of what I did or said. It came to a boil-over on Christmas Eve of 1998. I was a total, sullen jerk. I recall my mom pleading, almost tearfully, to my dad and brother not to let my behavior ruin our Christmas.

In the years after we repaired our relationship, but to me, it doesn't matter if I'm "forgiven" to them. I still carry around the regret and self-hatred for how I behaved.

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post #10 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 02:25 PM
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You're a year younger than me and have two children... I can't imagine doing that in this economic climate. You poor guy! You must be beyond stressed. On the bright side, you're also ahead and will be young enough to enjoy the next generations of your family. Raise em well.

I have a lot of regrets, but they aren't decisions I could have ever feasibly known would be bad at the time. I always just made the best decision I could with what I knew, wanted, and hoped for at the time.
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post #11 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 02:39 PM
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I don't really have that one fork I took the wrong path at. My life has been a serious of bad/poor decisions, lol. I can't say I can think of anything that sticks out above the others for me to regret.

Besides, I'm sure if I was magically teleported back in time, I'd end up in the same place anyway.

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post #12 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 05:35 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by harrison View Post
Yes I am. It really pisses me off actually.

Most other things have turned out alright in my life - considering the mental health problems I have. I've got a lot to be grateful for. Things could be a lot worse for me.

Why do you regret having kids? Is it because you're worried they'll have mental health problems too?
good question mate i think i regret it because im not capable of being a father figure its not meant for me

i also cant deal with the stress that comes from raising them they might get mentally ill too because i am
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post #13 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 05:38 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Karsten View Post
I don't really have that one fork I took the wrong path at. My life has been a serious of bad/poor decisions, lol. I can't say I can think of anything that sticks out above the others for me to regret.

Besides, I'm sure if I was magically teleported back in time, I'd end up in the same place anyway.
its very deep that you said that even if i turned the time back , you would get the same problems ,

but are there any choices in your life where you could make a change ,
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post #14 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 05:45 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by leaf in the wind View Post
You're a year younger than me and have two children... I can't imagine doing that in this economic climate. You poor guy! You must be beyond stressed. On the bright side, you're also ahead and will be young enough to enjoy the next generations of your family. Raise em well.

I have a lot of regrets, but they aren't decisions I could have ever feasibly known would be bad at the time. I always just made the best decision I could with what I knew, wanted, and hoped for at the time.
thank you i appreciate your kind words , have you ever had moments that made you say ,why is this always happening to me , not knowing that theres millions of people saying the same exact thing at the same time when you said it , the world is so big but not everything that was designed in here is meant for us , we put meaning into our lives by doing or creating new things so that it doesnt get boring ,
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post #15 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 06:16 PM
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I regret sitting for so long in my teens...
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post #16 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 06:16 PM
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I really regret joining this world. should've gone to the good one rather than this **** hole 🤣

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post #17 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 07:35 PM
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post #18 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 07:38 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IcedOver View Post
I have a lot of regrets, but when I think of the biggest, I come back to how I treated my parents in the late '90s. It was a combination of what I call my "OCD focus" starting to take hold, immaturity, social issues, and just being a jerk. I didn't actually feel or believe that they deserved the way I treated and talked to them, but the way I was doing things and why I was doing them fit my OCD issues (I wouldn't say this was classic or stereotypical OCD, but it's what I call it). They didn't deserve anything of what I did or said. It came to a boil-over on Christmas Eve of 1998. I was a total, sullen jerk. I recall my mom pleading, almost tearfully, to my dad and brother not to let my behavior ruin our Christmas.

In the years after we repaired our relationship, but to me, it doesn't matter if I'm "forgiven" to them. I still carry around the regret and self-hatred for how I behaved.
damn , it takes more than balls to admit something like that , that parent image is very strong image that we carry everywhere we go , work , or any social place has a parental topic
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post #19 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-15-2019, 11:39 PM
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good question mate i think i regret it because im not capable of being a father figure its not meant for me

i also cant deal with the stress that comes from raising them they might get mentally ill too because i am
Don't worry mate - you'll be okay. You're pretty young to have 2 kids already. You're the same age as my son is now - and I'm very glad he isn't married or having kids yet.

Being a parent is pretty scary at the best of times. I didn't get married until I was 30 and my son wasn't born until I was 35 - and it still scared the hell out of me. But we managed alright - and I certainly wouldn't consider myself the most stable of indivuals.

Hopefully your kids won't have the same problems you're dealing with. My son doesn't have any mental health issues that I can see - I think he takes more after his mother. Right now he's having a ball in Shanghai with a few mates.

I wish you all the best anyway.
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post #20 of 30 (permalink) Old 12-16-2019, 12:54 AM
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Probably just staying inside, not doing anything much. Wasted many years on and off doing that. Long periods of not working/not going to school and of course not going on outings with people. Just cooped up in my room. Even when I'm working, I waste the weekends. Not sure how to fix the problem. I would go out more if I had someone to go with. I'm okay with doing certain things by myself, like shopping, eating out, and chores but I really don't want to go to museums, festivals, nearby cities, sightseeing, etc. by myself.

I tried meetups and they sort of helped but you don't really get to choose the activity unless you are running the meetup. And it's with strangers and other people I'd rather not hang out with. Often it's with a large group which causes issues. Meh.
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