What are your pet peeves? What pisses you off? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 03:17 AM Thread Starter
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What are your pet peeves? What pisses you off?


When I was younger, small things really bothered me. Pple chewing too loudly, slurping on soup or running a few minutes late (this one still bothers me if it's more than 5 mins tbh.)

Nowadays, larger attitudes or, idk, ways of being piss me off.

Pple who constantly talk s**t about pple annoy me. Like get a life and focus on it. Everyone has an off day where someone really got to them and they want to vent, but for some, it's a hobby. To my mom and aunts- it's like bloodsport. I typically just leave the room while they're at it and silently pray for death.

Pple who judge others in general, but especially about things they've previously struggled with. Makes me want to bang my head against the wall. If you struggled with depression, sa, poverty, weight, whatever for 5, 10, 15, 20 yrs then you figure it out and become judgemental of pple who are still struggling, you are basically satan to me. This is such a common behavior, I swear it's pple projecting their previous self hatred onto others. It's not when they're compassionately trying to help pple. I'm talking about the smug, obnoxious, condescending 'why don't you just do it!" It's like 'oh yea and what were you doing the last 20 yrs treading water that made you so enlightened?' Everyone is on their own path, their own journey, with their unique history, difficulties and things click in different times. Maybe it took you 10yrs and 2 days. It took them 3 yrs, it took someone 57. It doesn't ****ing matter. Help with compassionate kindness or get out of the ****ing way cause you're making s**t worse. Aargh!!!

I have 2 more that bother me, but I'll save you from the full wonder of my crotchetiness. I'll leave them for another time/different post.
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post #2 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 03:28 AM
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superficiality and monopoly. narcissism.

arrogance is a perceived effect of narcissism, though its harder to define without a lot of false positives. its easier to determine narcissism through the monopolistic practices of people who demonstrate it.

superficiality is a bad habit that many people are conditioned with-- on the extreme end you have people in cults, and closer to the middle or average you have passive consumers.
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post #3 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 03:30 AM
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Well immediately I can think that punctuality is a big one. I'm always on time (usually early) to wherever I need to be. I was with someone who didn't have a punctual bone in her body, drove me crazy.

People who have a need to constantly talk and interact with everyone, namely the guy who walks by and says hello and hi to everyone all day long at work and gets upset when you don't reply hello for the 7th time today.

Someone who in the first sentence of introducing themselves has to tell me they're a Christian. Why? I'm a Gemini, what now?

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post #4 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:34 AM Thread Starter
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superficiality and monopoly. narcissism.

arrogance is a perceived effect of narcissism, though its harder to define without a lot of false positives. its easier to determine narcissism through the monopolistic practices of people who demonstrate it.

superficiality is a bad habit that many people are conditioned with-- on the extreme end you have people in cults, and closer to the middle or average you have passive consumers.
Hey! Can you expand on how cults relate to superficiality? I'd love to learn more (if you feel like explaining)
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post #5 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:39 AM Thread Starter
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Well immediately I can think that punctuality is a big one. I'm always on time (usually early) to wherever I need to be. I was with someone who didn't have a punctual bone in her body, drove me crazy.

People who have a need to constantly talk and interact with everyone, namely the guy who walks by and says hello and hi to everyone all day long at work and gets upset when you don't reply hello for the 7th time today.

Someone who in the first sentence of introducing themselves has to tell me they're a Christian. Why? I'm a Gemini, what now?
Omg, I've been that person. For shame! When I was doing a lot to combat my SA I became very social and I even annoyed myself.

Ditto on the Christian thing. I used to be Christian and it annoyed me even back then, though I can only think of 2 or 3 pple who did it. Most pple trying to spread the good word just mention it somewhere along the way. Let your light shine through your behavior is more typical I've found.
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post #6 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:48 AM
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Hey! Can you expand on how cults relate to superficiality? I'd love to learn more (if you feel like explaining)
so the idea of a monopoly is the idea of exclusivity, of exclusive control. in a true partnership or community, it matters what more than one person (or type of person) says. in a cult, the leader has an unreasonable amount of leverage over the lives of other people. cults micromanage the lives of their members-- and the feelings and opinions of the members about this dont really matter.

narcissists and monopolistic corporations work the same way. they have an unreasonable and imbalanced amount of power and impact on the lives of customers, romantic partners and friends.

whether we are talking about the corporate reduction of an individual to a demographic, or a narcissistic reduction of a person to the ways in which they can be exploited, superficiality governs the perspective that the exploiter has towards the people they exploit.

in other words, they dont treat you like a person. youre just a collection of resources and opportunities and they have a garden to maintain, and youre a crop. your best qualities, your individualism, your strengths and the reason people should truly appreciate you-- those things are not relevant in such a context. your worth as a person (the reason to care about your feelings or opinion) is not relevant in such a context, and thats extremely superficial.
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post #7 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SparklingWater View Post
Omg, I've been that person. For shame! When I was doing a lot to combat my SA I became very social and I even annoyed myself.

Ditto on the Christian thing. I used to be Christian and it annoyed me even back then, though I can only think of 2 or 3 pple who did it. Most pple trying to spread the good word just mention it somewhere along the way. Let your light shine through your behavior is more typical I've found.
Have no problem with people who are religious of any kind (just to clarify). I was raised Catholic but it never took.

Those who quickly throw it out there like that immediately make me suspicious of them. lol They tend to be the ones who hide behind their religion for all the dirty things they really do... in my mind anyway.

(¬_¬)
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post #8 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 05:35 AM
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I genuinely just don't get on with either of the following:

1. low openness with high conscientiousness (or rather, they judge me harshly, so obv i don't like them), their "things have to be x way" piss me off as well
2. people who manipulate, any whiff of manipulation I am gone now, can't be dealing with it
3. people who have low knowledge in a particular area, but try to persuade others around to their way of thinking. So its a combination of low insight, cognitive dissonance, and bizarre arrogance.

Obviously I have been guilty of 3 a lot lmao.

I don't really have pet peeves with how people behave though, if it doesn't directly impact me, whatever.
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post #9 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 07:54 AM
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☆ People who need to always find something to complain about.

☆ Political correctness. There’s always something that people suddenly find offensive, even though there never used to be a problem with it. Then once the “problem” is spotted, everyone agrees because they think it makes them look like a good person, and the “bad” thing either gets changed or banned.

☆ People who never listen to what they’re told, even when people are trying to help them. They ask for advice, never take it, then have the same things happen to them over and over again when they could have avoided it by taking the advice they were given.

☆ People who don’t try to understand others, or the problems they have. It’s like some people can be ignorant on purpose.

☆ When people are mean or rude for no reason, just because they can be (some trolls on here are an example).

☆ When people call little kids over three “babies” and all dogs “puppies.”

☆ When people fold books in half, especially when they break its spine on purpose.
it up to check for needles, or are too lazy to.

☆ When people write “and family” after the parents’ names on Christmas cards, even though they know the names of the children.

☆ When words are spelled wrong on purpose because it “makes it easier,” even though it doesn’t take long to write the word.

☆ When power switches are left on with nothing plugged in. It means someone unplugged it without turning it off, which seems dangerous.

☆ When someone dies and it makes the news and it says “Person dies” instead of “Person died.” They only died once. They don’t keep dying, so it shouldn’t be plural.

☆ When people are warned to evacuate and they don’t, so they stay there, even after a lot of warnings, then complain later because they “weren’t told to leave.”

☆ When people stand next to rides in shopping centres with their kids, waiting for someone else to use it so they can put their kid on it without paying. My family say this happens a lot.

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post #10 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 08:22 AM
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Hypocrites for sure. And people who try to ride a high horse and pretend their sh*t doesn't stink.
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post #11 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 10:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SparklingWater View Post
When I was younger, small things really bothered me. Pple chewing too loudly, slurping on soup or running a few minutes late (this one still bothers me if it's more than 5 mins tbh.)

Nowadays, larger attitudes or, idk, ways of being piss me off.

Pple who constantly talk s**t about pple annoy me. Like get a life and focus on it. Everyone has an off day where someone really got to them and they want to vent, but for some, it's a hobby. To my mom and aunts- it's like bloodsport. I typically just leave the room while they're at it and silently pray for death.

Pple who judge others in general, but especially about things they've previously struggled with. Makes me want to bang my head against the wall. If you struggled with depression, sa, poverty, weight, whatever for 5, 10, 15, 20 yrs then you figure it out and become judgemental of pple who are still struggling, you are basically satan to me. This is such a common behavior, I swear it's pple projecting their previous self hatred onto others. It's not when they're compassionately trying to help pple. I'm talking about the smug, obnoxious, condescending 'why don't you just do it!" It's like 'oh yea and what were you doing the last 20 yrs treading water that made you so enlightened?' Everyone is on their own path, their own journey, with their unique history, difficulties and things click in different times. Maybe it took you 10yrs and 2 days. It took them 3 yrs, it took someone 57. It doesn't ****ing matter. Help with compassionate kindness or get out of the ****ing way cause you're making s**t worse. Aargh!!!

I have 2 more that bother me, but I'll save you from the full wonder of my crotchetiness. I'll leave them for another time/different post.
Hi, I agree with a bit of what you wrote.. especially people who are struggling, I can't stand people who just don't have a level of empathy; people nowadays are so quick to jump on people or make them feel small. Something that I never thought I'd have though is.. a bit of anger on the road, not road rage necessarily.. but recently it sort've got to that, luckily the situation wasn't more severe.. my BIG pet peeve are distracted drivers, slow drivers, at the very least maybe put a hazard light so I can pass you; aggressive drivers who almost kill people. People who are just blindly prejudice; those are the big ones for me.

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post #12 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 02:33 PM
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~hypocrisy and double standards

~political correctness

~the media and the their over the top hysterics and complete lack of journalistic intergrity

~the elitist, holier than thou crowd in Hollywood

~reality television...and its tendency to make stupid people famous and popular.
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post #13 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:00 PM
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Morning television hosts - I can't watch most of them at all now without wanting to throw something at the TV. Even some of the ones on the ABC are annoying so I have to mute it. It's almost bearable then.
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post #14 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:36 PM
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Smokers, excessive cursing, loud chewing, whiners.
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post #15 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 04:52 PM
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People who don't respect my boundaries

When people push their way into the subway cars

People who talk loudly on the bus on their cell

When I see someone being rude to someone in customer service

Certain people's unsollicited advice

Obnoxious laughter

Ignorance

Garbage/Recycle stuff on the ground. Its 2019

Bags on bus seats

Slurping

Smoking obviously (huge one for alot)


To name a few

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post #16 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 07:19 PM
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Cashiers who cough or sneeze directly into their hand, then proceed to handle my groceries as if nothing happened. Or, those who cough or sneeze openly without making any effort to cover it.
People who always lick their fingers before counting cash or turning pages in a book. Yuck!
Improper use of grammar and punctuation. "Thank you" and "a lot", not "thankyou" and "alot". The 's is meant to show possession, not the plural form of a word. There is a campground a few miles from where I live with a huge sign out front that reads "Visitor's and Guest's must sign in at the front office". Drive me nuts every time I see it.
Loud, obnoxious people who want to be the center of attention, or those who constantly brag about everything they do or own.
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post #17 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 07:57 PM
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People looking at me while I'm eating, strangers to be more specific. If someone I know is doing it, assuming they're at the same table, I don't really mind so long as they're not just staring at me.

Also lazy people in general, especially in public like people who for some reason can walk all over the goddamn store no problem but can't walk a few steps to put their shopping cart away.

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post #18 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 08:16 PM
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- Overbearing, domineering types.

- People that always talk about "common sense" and how everyone = dumb, and every word uttered out of their portals has something to do with critiquing something or someone. Geez! I mean, I'd appreciate the constructive criticism here and there, but not to the point of being slathered in that crap in every interaction.

- Standing too close to body.

- Nosy people

- Loud people

- Staring / glaring

- "Tough love" crap

- People who turn nearly everything into a confrontation / disagreement; "devil's advocate" is good, but not this defensive / confrontational attitude some seem to give off. A lot these types are on reddit.

- Using "being blunt" as an excuse just to be an ***, and then being proud of it, as they know it'll alienate people, but view themselves on a "higher plane" for doing so

- Falling on extremes of worshipping logic / rational thinking or thinking "it's muh special schmecial intuition; therefore it must be true. No one can see what I see". Both of these (logic / rational thinking and intuition) are tools, and have their time in usage for a myriad of differing scenarios, but some just take it too far.
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post #19 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 09:24 PM
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Snobby people...Ugh, it's like I'm a different species to them.

Arrogance

Clean freaks...I've had to deal with this and nothing makes them happy except for a spotless house. People like that really need a life. I've been woken up early in the morning just to clean a few times before. It pissed me off. And I had to catch up on sleep. :/

People that gossip...I have no time for this nor do I want to hear someone's mean comments about this or that person. Just keep it to yourself. Guess this sorta goes under snobs.

People that think it's okay to willingly mess your life up by doing drugs but when you just have one day where you feel down and not because of drugs, they say you should get over it. I've known people like that. It's ridiculous. I think I have my reasons.



I wouldn't say a few of these are pet peeves, though. Since I've had a reason to be mad about a few of them. I try not to get mad that much but some of these things just get under my skin. :/
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post #20 of 131 (permalink) Old 01-09-2019, 09:55 PM
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Depends on the day. There aren't too many things that seriously piss me off. Most of my pet peeves add up to little more than moderate irritation/annoyance. I have A LOT of those. Too many to list.

One thing that does seriously piss me off is when someone gets in a confined space with me and won't ****ing shut up. I don't like to talk very much anyway. Especially not when the topic doesn't interest me in the slightest or I'm not in the mood. I don't really get upset about it unless the person has been talking for a while and I haven't said one word and/or they completely ignore all of my hints (body language and so forth) that I'm getting irritated.

Being stuck in a car with someone who does this is horrible.
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