some modest simple houses/flats are more cheerful/comforting than the expensive ones. - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-25-2019, 06:55 AM Thread Starter
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some modest simple houses/flats are more cheerful/comforting than the expensive ones.


have you felt like that before?

like you don't know why you feel uncomfortable and not happy living in a big expensive house,

and you miss the small pleasing cheap one you lived in before?
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post #2 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-25-2019, 07:03 AM
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Yes. I’ve always wanted to live in a cozy bungalow in an old, quiet neighbourhood.. Less to clean/maintain. Oh **** just researched it and it costs like 400k-600k where I live.
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post #3 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-25-2019, 09:36 AM
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It's not uncommon for people in large houses to feel less happy with it. From people I've spoken to, one of the common examples is where a child has gone off to university, leaving the two parents alone in a large house. If one or both work, then the house is mostly empty. <3

<3
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post #4 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-25-2019, 09:52 AM
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I just wouldn't want to be a slave to a huge mortgage payment for a bunch of space I don't really need. I've got less than $10k in my single wide trailer and it's all I need. Although I do eventually want to build a pole barn to keep my vehicles in.
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post #5 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-26-2019, 09:06 PM
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I've gotten to the opinion where I think having less is better. A bigger house seems more empty when it's just me and is more space to clean and fill up with junk.

I'd rather have a smaller but well designed house than a big one that has lots of wasted space.

Although, strangely when I visit other peoples' houses, I feel out of place, like it's too nice for me. I guess that's all subjective though, as to some my place might seem like a palace compared to where they come from.

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post #6 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-26-2019, 09:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RSxo View Post
It's not uncommon for people in large houses to feel less happy with it. From people I've spoken to, one of the common examples is where a child has gone off to university, leaving the two parents alone in a large house. If one or both work, then the house is mostly empty. <3
That too. I know plenty of people that live alone or without kids in a big house. I used to think it would be sweet to have a nice, big house, but now it's a lot of upkeep and wasted space to me.

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post #7 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-26-2019, 09:19 PM
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We have a small house, 1500sq ft, and would love a bigger house but they are so expensive in my area.

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post #8 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-26-2019, 09:24 PM
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We have a small house, 1500sq ft, and would love a bigger house but they are so expensive in my area.
That to me is a pretty good size house, especially if it also has a garage. I'd be happy with that for just myself. Layout helps though, and to me the design of it is more important than square footage.

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post #9 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 03:26 AM
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Well, I spent some time in a relatively modest 3 bedroom house out in the woods for a couple of years in my teens. It was a new house but it was nothing fancy. Actually, I guess a house of it's size would go for a lot today in a suburban area but I guess it was cheap rent because of where it was at the time.

Living there was pretty awesome. There was one neighboring house about 30 feet away and another about a hundred feet away (out of view with trees between). You could actually sit outside on the back porch all day long and no one would even know you were there. You wouldn't see anyone. You wouldn't see any cars. Just trees and peace.

The people who lived in that area? Not so awesome. The school I had to go to when I lived there was horrendous. That was where the vast majority of my bullying (that I have mentioned) happened. The house was up on the side of a mountain and you had to get to it on a gravel road. So when I got off the bus in the evenings, the bullies would chase me literally almost to my house. It was a nightmare.

Nice place to live except the people around us were trashy and hard to get along with.

/WYSD
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post #10 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 03:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coincidence View Post
have you felt like that before?

like you don't know why you feel uncomfortable and not happy living in a big expensive house,
A mansion or similar size house has to be dusted every few days or week at most. Especially if doors, windows are open. So need butlers, maid staff.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coincidence View Post
and you miss the small pleasing cheap one you lived in before?
Actually felt like was bigger.
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post #11 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 04:10 AM
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I live in a 2-bed flat at the moment and it's perfect.

But if money was not an issue, I'd love a huge, ancient, opulent manor on the verge of collapse. 12 bedrooms and a ballroom, and grounds for me to be a batshxt crazy lady in.

I guess it depends on the type of house. If it's a modern house, I'd want it to be small-ish. But a castle needs space to be a castle.

Edit: realised I didn't answer the question at all. I've lived in a big house and a flat, and the flat wins hands down. Safe, easier to clean, cosier. You can't quite mark your territory the same way in a big house.

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post #12 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 04:39 AM
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I guess it depends if the modest, simple place has decent heating etc. We lived for years in a small 2 bedroom villa unit when we first moved down here and it wasn't very comfortable at all. In a good area but no ducted heating and much too small. Freezing in winter and terribly hot in summer.

So much better when we could afford to get a nice house with decent heating/air-con. I don't live there anymore but I'm glad that at least my wife could at least have a good place to live and we can pass it on to my son.
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post #13 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 05:42 AM
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3 weeks of road-tripping with sleeping in my car on rest and truck stops really put things in perspective. I realised just how little we really need in terms of comfort to be happy, and how much our complicated lives clutter our minds and prevent us from genuinely enjoying life.

The more we have, the more time and effort we need to maintain it, and that accumulates over time and makes us chronically tired and stressed.

My secret dream is to one day buy an RV and live there. When life is simple and all you have is within your arm's reach, then you can stop worrying about accumulating and storing stuff and can focus on really fun things: reading, travelling, exercising, etc. Realistically I'll probably buy an apartment in a couple of years, then sell it in ~20 years, buy an RV and travel around Americas.
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post #14 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 12:43 PM
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Seems very wasteful to heat or air condition a huge house that only has a couple people living in it. Then with all those windows, so many potential points of entry for burglars. That would make me nervous.

A big house would be nice for pets that are kept indoors. Always feel kind of bad for pets in small apartments. Too dangerous to let cats outside and roam.
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post #15 of 15 (permalink) Old 05-27-2019, 04:06 PM
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Smaller places are more charming and economical. That's probably why i like tiny houses so much and would like to live in one I built myself someday. If not a tiny house, then something small that's easy to keep and a decent patch of land.

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