Driving advice? - Social Anxiety Forum
Reply
 
Thread Tools
post #1 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 07:42 AM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Question

Driving advice?


I really want to get better at driving and start driving myself to places. It would open so many doors. I got my license at 21 on my 2nd attempt but I've never owned a car and only driven to the mailbox by myself. Haven't really drove in years. My family won't help me practice so I'm thinking about getting 8 driving lessons for $325. But even after that not sure what my next step would be. Should I just buy a cheap car and just sink or swim?

Just need some advice on this.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 10:04 AM
Self isolating from self
 
Fever Dream's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,574
I'd look for a somewhat reliable, but inexpensive vehicle to start with. One that should you be involved in an accident, you wouldn't be not losing much. I suppose lessons aren't a bad idea if you feel you need them. If it were me, I find area's and times that are light on traffic to practice. Maybe only drive the same streets/routes to start with so that your practicing on familiar terrain. At least until you feel more comfortable, and then you can venture out from there.

Setup progress now at 100% capacity.
Fever Dream is offline  
post #3 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 11:55 AM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fever Dream View Post
I'd look for a somewhat reliable, but inexpensive vehicle to start with. One that should you be involved in an accident, you wouldn't be not losing much. I suppose lessons aren't a bad idea if you feel you need them. If it were me, I find area's and times that are light on traffic to practice. Maybe only drive the same streets/routes to start with so that your practicing on familiar terrain. At least until you feel more comfortable, and then you can venture out from there.
Thank you and good advice. Maybe like a $1000-$2000 car.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #4 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 01:45 PM
ssɐlƃ ƃuᴉʞool ǝɥʇ ɥƃnoɹɥ┴
 
zonebox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Florida, Oosa
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,183
My Mood: Inspired
If you buy a used car, it is really important for you to know how to fix it. Most of the work you can do yourself and will need simple tools to do the repairs. You can find almost anything you need to know, on youtube videos. If you do buy a used car, and breakdown or start noticing problems, you will save a ton of money by doing the repairs yourself, they are a lot easier than one would think. Say something simple, like a water pump costing you $30 in parts and three hours of work, that could shoot up to hundreds of dollars at a garage.

You really don't need experience, you don't need to be a mechanic to do most of the repairs, it just requires a little patience, the right tools (mine are cheapo Walmart ones), and a guide such as youtube. Specialty tools are almost always available cheaply to rent, at auto part shops, so you don't need to buy those. Once the engine, computer or transmission go, I would say just get another car, unless you get really good at repairs. Everything else though, you should be able to repair fairly easily.

If you rely on a garage to do the repairs, it gets really expensive when things start breaking down, which is almost always inevitable with used cars with 150k + miles. Plus you never know how the previous person drove the car you are buying, they could have beat it to a pulp, then there are just lemons that have one problem after another, right out of the dealership.

Before buying a used car, be sure to do a lot of research online as for what to look out for, how to do a proper inspection, this will help you in the long run.

If you buy a new car, get one that has a good warranty that will last as long as your payments.

Live and let live
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
"Whoever fights monsters should
see to it that in the process he does not become a
monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss,
the abyss will gaze back into you."

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

http://zbox.neocities.org/
zonebox is offline  
post #5 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 02:12 PM
SAS Member
 
RelinquishedHell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Vancouver, Washington
Gender: Other
Age: 30
Posts: 16,542
My Mood: Mellow
You should buy a cheap car and practice yourself. Why would you give $325 away to some dork? lol

Also, if you buy something cheap and old the aftermarket parts are usually really cheap as well. And older cars are really easy to work on
RelinquishedHell is offline  
post #6 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 02:20 PM
bipolar
 
harrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 15,935
After seeing a few posts on SAS before I think the driving tests are probably a good idea. Tbh I'm not sure buying a car straight off is a good idea - maybe you should see how you are at driving before committing to that?

I'm not trying to be rude Kevin and not saying it applies to you - but some people just don't seem suited to driving. Whether it was their anxiety or what I don't know - but it pays to be careful.
harrison is offline  
post #7 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:32 PM
Pesky Pessimist
 
Blue Dino's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 7,199
1. Get yourself a car
2. Driving lessons (if you are not confident practicing yourself with car).
3. Practice yourself further with car in light traffic areas. Gradually drive in heavier traffic and farther distance as comfortable.

Pretty much what Fever Dream said in terms of starting advice.

The truth is strictly what the ones in power perceives it to be.

Enjoy any good things, even the little and menial ones, as you will never know what impending distresses could descend upon you in a moment.
Blue Dino is offline  
post #8 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:49 PM
I am average!
 
Ominous Indeed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Age: 26
Posts: 3,969
It has taken me months to get used to driving, even after getting a driver license. That is probably mostly because I have been driving to new places everyday, a lot of the time in a very crowded city, and the unfamiliarity is scary. I am getting more and more used to it though even though I have been scared every time, things actually go fine. In my span of driving for about 6 months I have only been honked at 4 times, two of those in a roundabout because I was a bit slow to get started after the route was clear. I am pretty satisfied with that actually..
Ominous Indeed is offline  
post #9 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:52 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by RelinquishedHell View Post
You should buy a cheap car and practice yourself. Why would you give $325 away to some dork? lol

Also, if you buy something cheap and old the aftermarket parts are usually really cheap as well. And older cars are really easy to work on
Because I could use the practice, not a good driver and my anxiety issues. Thanks for the advice .

Quote:
Originally Posted by harrison View Post
After seeing a few posts on SAS before I think the driving tests are probably a good idea. Tbh I'm not sure buying a car straight off is a good idea - maybe you should see how you are at driving before committing to that?

I'm not trying to be rude Kevin and not saying it applies to you - but some people just don't seem suited to driving. Whether it was their anxiety or what I don't know - but it pays to be careful.
Not tests just lessons but the only way I could ever practice after that is buy getting a car.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #10 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:52 PM
I am average!
 
Ominous Indeed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Age: 26
Posts: 3,969
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin001 View Post
Thank you and good advice. Maybe like a $1000-$2000 car.
Drive only at night in the start, when there will be practically no cars on the road
Ominous Indeed is offline  
post #11 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:53 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ominous Indeed View Post
It has taken me months to get used to driving, even after getting a driver license. That is probably mostly because I have been driving to new places everyday, a lot of the time in a very crowded city, and the unfamiliarity is scary. I am getting more and more used to it though even though I have been scared every time, things actually go fine. In my span of driving for about 6 months I have only been honked at 4 times, two of those in a roundabout because I was a bit slow to get started after the route was clear. I am pretty satisfied with that actually..
That is awesome!

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #12 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 03:54 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ominous Indeed View Post
Drive only at night in the start, when there will be practically no cars on the road
Hmm ok I would think at night might be easier for me to hit something though less light. But makes sense.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #13 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:20 PM
bipolar
 
harrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 15,935
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin001 View Post
Because I could use the practice, not a good driver and my anxiety issues. Thanks for the advice .



Not tests just lessons but the only way I could ever practice after that is buy getting a car.
Sorry Kevin - that was a typo, I meant lessons. Would be a good way to see how you are on the road.

What were you like when you were driving? Did it go okay?
harrison is offline  
post #14 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:25 PM
Moderator
 
WillYouStopDave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: United States
Gender: Male
Age: 47
Posts: 31,643
My Mood: Relaxed
IMO, used ares are the way to go but buying one is also a minefield of uncertainty unless you know cars or you know somebody who is honest and knows cars.

You could theoretically buy the cheapest piece of crap you can find and put new tires on it and drive it for years. You could also theoretically buy something that costs a lot more and looks great and has no signs of trouble and have a total loss on it in a year.

Since you're asking, I assume you don't know cars and don't know anyone who does. So there's lots of risk.
WillYouStopDave is offline  
post #15 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:37 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by harrison View Post
Sorry Kevin - that was a typo, I meant lessons. Would be a good way to see how you are on the road.

What were you like when you were driving? Did it go okay?
Anxious mess, I'm confident now but still anxious and need practice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by WillYouStopDave View Post
IMO, used ares are the way to go but buying one is also a minefield of uncertainty unless you know cars or you know somebody who is honest and knows cars.

You could theoretically buy the cheapest piece of crap you can find and put new tires on it and drive it for years. You could also theoretically buy something that costs a lot more and looks great and has no signs of trouble and have a total loss on it in a year.

Since you're asking, I assume you don't know cars and don't know anyone who does. So there's lots of risk.
I figured buy a cheap car for a grand or two and hope it lasts for a couple of years. I read the average annual maintenance cost for cars is $1200. After a couple of years I could upgrade to a 5k car then 10k.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #16 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:45 PM
SAS Member
 
Micronian's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Toronto, Canada
Gender: Male
Age: 40
Posts: 3,970
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin001 View Post
I really want to get better at driving and start driving myself to places. It would open so many doors. I got my license at 21 on my 2nd attempt but I've never owned a car and only driven to the mailbox by myself. Haven't really drove in years. My family won't help me practice so I'm thinking about getting 8 driving lessons for $325. But even after that not sure what my next step would be. Should I just buy a cheap car and just sink or swim?

Just need some advice on this.

are you able to do "car sharing"? maybe that can help you, especially if you're not expecting to drive so often.

"I might be great tomorrow, but hopeless yesterday"
Micronian is offline  
post #17 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:46 PM
Moderator
 
WillYouStopDave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: United States
Gender: Male
Age: 47
Posts: 31,643
My Mood: Relaxed
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin001 View Post
Anxious mess, I'm confident now but still anxious and need practice.



I figured buy a cheap car for a grand or two and hope it lasts for a couple of years. I read the average annual maintenance cost for cars is $1200. After a couple of years I could upgrade to a 5k car then 10k.
Well, I guess probably my best advice in that case is to insist that they let you take it to a garage and have it looked at. The most obvious things to watch out for are tires, brakes, suspension system, exhaust system and electrical problems (you do not want a car with any serious electrical problems, as they will leave you stranded and cost an arm and a leg to diagnose if the cause is not completely obvious). A set of new tires will take a chunk out of you. Getting brakes done right for a good price is also tricky if they figure you for someone who doesn't know the difference. Exhaust or suspension/steering work is a nightmare.

Basically, if you have to do more than put oil and gas in it, you might as well get rid of it and buy another cheap car.
WillYouStopDave is offline  
post #18 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 04:53 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
Quote:
Originally Posted by Micronian View Post
are you able to do "car sharing"? maybe that can help you, especially if you're not expecting to drive so often.
No friends bro.

Quote:
Originally Posted by WillYouStopDave View Post
Well, I guess probably my best advice in that case is to insist that they let you take it to a garage and have it looked at. The most obvious things to watch out for are tires, brakes, suspension system, exhaust system and electrical problems (you do not want a car with any serious electrical problems, as they will leave you stranded and cost an arm and a leg to diagnose if the cause is not completely obvious). A set of new tires will take a chunk out of you. Getting brakes done right for a good price is also tricky if they figure you for someone who doesn't know the difference. Exhaust or suspension/steering work is a nightmare.

Basically, if you have to do more than put oil and gas in it, you might as well get rid of it and buy another cheap car.
Yeah I wouldn't be driving much just the basics.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
post #19 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 05:36 PM
bipolar
 
harrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 15,935
The thing is Kevin - it's not just having to repair things with a cheap, old car - it's safety as well. When I was young I had so many crap cars - a lot were probably not really road-worthy. I was insane. It's good to have one checked as willyoustopdave said.

Here we have a thing where the RACV or NRMA will completely check the car for you - it used to be a hundred bucks or maybe more. An excellent idea. I told my son to do it before he bought his first car and remarkably he actually did it. Then at least you know whether it's been in an accident or not.
harrison is offline  
post #20 of 134 (permalink) Old 05-07-2020, 06:01 PM Thread Starter
I Am Second
 
Kevin001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: USA ~ Louisiana
Language: American
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 57,637
My Mood: Inspired
^^ Thanks I'm just ready to start living.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
Kevin001 is offline  
Reply

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome