Does posting here make you feel less lonely? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 05:09 PM Thread Starter
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Does posting here make you feel less lonely?


?
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post #2 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 05:10 PM
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Yes, otherwise I would have stopped a long time ago.
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post #3 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 05:22 PM
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I don't feel lonely, I can't remember if I have ever felt lonely. I mean, I have missed people and I wonder if that is the same thing as being lonely. I mostly post here, because I like to have my thoughts to be examined, and get a little input from others, this place is kind of my second journal, with more interaction with others. Posting to public spaces, pushes me toward examining what I have written, well after I have wrote it down in text form, it kind of pushes me to think more about whatever I may be writing about.

Like this thread for example, I am likely to wander off to various search engines researching loneliness now. I'll probably watch a few videos, and possibly reply back here when I have learned more.

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post #4 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 05:23 PM
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It doesn't, because I don't feel lonely in first place... Loneliness is one of these things that I actually like.

Even shy people can be sassy sometimes...
I'll put drunk raccoon in my signature as well, because I CAN...
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post #5 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 05:59 PM
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It temporarily satisfies the need to socialize, so that I can get back to doing other stuff. If I don't socialize at all, I go insane and stop being able to work. But it doesn't really make me feel any less lonely overall. Sometimes it does, but then other times it makes me feel even more lonely, because I realize how little I have in common with anyone. The two feelings just sort of cancel out.

For forty-seven years I've put up with it now. I must stop Christmas from coming ... but how?
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post #6 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 06:09 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by truant View Post
It temporarily satisfies the need to socialize, so that I can get back to doing other stuff. If I don't socialize at all, I go insane and stop being able to work. But it doesn't really make me feel any less lonely overall. Sometimes it does, but then other times it makes me feel even more lonely, because I realize how little I have in common with anyone. The two feelings just sort of cancel out.
yes.

i couldn't put it into words. this is exactly what i wanted to say word by word, esp the how little i have in common with anyone part.
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post #7 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 06:17 PM Thread Starter
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i also am literally living alone since 2015.
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post #8 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 06:19 PM
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Nope.

Miles to go before I sleep. Vale.

Know your ACE (adverse childhood experiences) score?
Sometimes, SA is a symptom of significant developmental, attachment or interpersonal trauma (emotional neglect counts). If you're still stuck after you've tried SA treatments such as CBT and exposure, research C-PTSD and see if it resonates. Here's an awesome resource. Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving
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post #9 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 06:25 PM
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More lonely because I'm pretty much an alien from another planet and I think I drive people away.

"It's a gift to exist, and with existence comes suffering. There's no escaping that."
Stephen Colbert
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post #10 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 06:26 PM
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Not really. I stopped being a regular here eons ago but I still like to lurk here once in a blue moon and say something. That's really where I'm at.
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post #11 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 08:16 PM
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Yeah it does. Even if it's just an echo chamber, it helps satisfy a need to talk.
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post #12 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 08:18 PM
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Only in fleeting moments.
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post #13 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 09:56 PM
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distraction

Nobody, I'm nobody.
I'm a tramp, a bum, a hobo, I'm a boxcar and a jug of wine, and a straight razor if you get too close to me.

Give me liberty, or give me memes!
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post #14 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 10:06 PM
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I don't know if "lonely" is the right word for how I feel when there is nothing to occupy my mind. I just need for my mind to be doing something it likes to do. And being/posting on here is one of those things. I probably wouldn't necessarily feel lonely without it. I would just have nothing to do. And I guess it's kind of a way for me to understand people and my own thoughts better.

When I was young, I had nothing. No TV, no internet, hardly any books or magazines. I didn't have a radio until I was 14 -16. So I had no real way of knowing what other people were thinking or how other people thought or what they'd say if they knew what I was thinking. Everything I knew was inside my own mind. So if I had doubts or fears or things I didn't understand, they'd just endlessly go around in my mind....unanswered. I tried to think my way out of not knowing anything about other people. Needless to say that did not go well.

/WYSD
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post #15 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 10:20 PM
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Little bit less lonely.

In addition, distracts from a stressful life.
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post #16 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-07-2019, 11:52 PM
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less lonely 1% of the time when someone I'm familiar with responds to one of my posts.

more lonely 1% of the time when some troll or other trickster gets the better of me.

and generally less lonely because I know there are people that exist that are similar to me. their existence is really something. I learn stuff from them. of course they're very distant from me physically and emotionally etc. so much that I almost doubt they really exist. a whisper of solidarity.

"I take what is mine. I pay the iron price."
―Balon Greyjoy
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post #17 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-08-2019, 12:21 AM
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I don't go on here because I'm lonely. I have friends, but only two really know what it's like to go through SA-related issues. I'm hoping to make friends so I do have people to relate to in that regard but even though I've been posting every day since I joined, it's been a bit difficult. Am I not posting enough? Am I not making the right kind of posts?
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post #18 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-08-2019, 12:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TopShelfHeart View Post
I don't go on here because I'm lonely. I have friends, but only two really know what it's like to go through SA-related issues. I'm hoping to make friends so I do have people to relate to in that regard but even though I've been posting every day since I joined, it's been a bit difficult. Am I not posting enough? Am I not making the right kind of posts?
It sometimes takes time on forums for regulars to accept new posters. You're probably not doing anything wrong. Posting regularly (whether people respond or not) is what you have to do. It also helps if you have an avatar people remember. But it also definitely helps if you quote people and post some kind of reply that is well thought out. It's easy to sometimes pass over posts that are not interactive.

/WYSD
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post #19 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-08-2019, 04:28 AM
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I don't really get lonely, sometimes I'll get it for a second or two but that's it. I don't really miss people either but I miss the times I've had with old friends. Coming here just turned into a habit.
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post #20 of 46 (permalink) Old 10-08-2019, 05:05 AM
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Yes. Its good to know you are not the only one suffering from this issue and you are not alone. You can benefit from others advice in similar situations.
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