Deep self-reflection question to ask yourself - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 04:18 AM
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Originally Posted by MyViewsMatter View Post
Ask yourself this question:

WILL YOU LIKE YOU IF YOU MET YOU?
How did we meet?

/WYSD
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post #22 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 08:35 AM
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Probably not.

Now I'm Nothing
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post #23 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 08:42 AM
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I figure I'd have to look at it how I look at like my dad & brothers, since we're all relatively similar. I like them all, but there are times they can be annoying. So I'd like me being around sometimes, but other times I'd just wish the other me would leave the damn house once in a while!

You are the wave, I am the naked island.
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post #24 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 04:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WillYouStopDave View Post
How did we meet?
THIS. So important. Context of a first impression is often overlooked in favor of just running into somebody. For the sake of simplicity though, I'll go with meeting myself at a restaurant or on the job. Someplace we'd have to be around each other long enough to possibly ease into a conversation.

I'd find myself amicable during conversation, but otherwise distant and preoccupied. There's a charm but its too fleeting. You aren't social enough outside of the friends you already have. I can tell you're cool but you have the radiance of a loner and I want to respect that.

However, I see you haven't finished your fries. Sharing is caring.
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post #25 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 04:36 PM
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@Zatch

Most people are superficially charming but once you get to know them are kinda jerks who hide it pretty well underneath the mask of reasonably good acting. How else would anyone get past a job interview? Life requires that you be able to survive on whatever wage you're making. If you can't ingratiate yourself to a host who will pay you to exist in their domain, you're in deep trouble.

Life is acting school and some people are way better at it than others. So, for example, if you meet someone you instantly hate the second you lay eyes on them, if you make a bad face when your brain cringes, that will definitely not win the award for best acting. If, OTOH, you can meet someone you loathe instantly and convince them you love them, yer goin' places man! The faster you convince them that you love them, the better. Or maybe not. Gotta be careful because it's not always desirable to convince a stranger you have an unexplained affinity for them.

For example, when it's gonna cost them to have you around in the future? Not such a great idea to express your undying love for them in record time. In that case, you have to convince them you're not needy. And even convince them they need you. At which point, it is OK to express your disdain for them because they have failed the acting test by revealing their failure to not need anyone.

The entire point of socialization is to trick other people into believing they need us. I definitely couldn't fool myself. Unfortunately, I never could fool anyone else either. When I was something like 17, I used to look in the mirror and wonder how the hell I was ever going to win any acting awards with this face and this body language. I just knew it wasn't gonna work. Oh that didn't stop me from trying. Because I knew I had to try and I might just get lucky (sometimes our perceptions of ourselves magnify the tells). What else can you do when you look in the mirror and you know that what you see looking back at you is everything you have to work with? Well, the first time I did that was a terrible realization that I was FORKed with a CAPITAL FORK. I liked what I saw but I knew no one else would. And that was the quandary. If you actually want to be unpopular, you probably will be. If you have no choice but to be unpopular, you still will be. If you have no choice and you like it anyway, man, yer done!

Is any of this real? I don't know. Maybe I just don't know myself. (TBH, it's just been a really long time since I've had a good rant)

/WYSD
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post #26 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 08:25 PM
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If I said, yea you aight, I'd be so happy.
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post #27 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 11:21 PM
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No...

Even shy people can be sassy sometimes...
I'll put drunk raccoon in my signature as well, because I CAN...
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post #28 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-25-2020, 12:04 AM
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post #29 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-25-2020, 09:47 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WillYouStopDave View Post
@Zatch

Most people are superficially charming but once you get to know them are kinda jerks who hide it pretty well underneath the mask of reasonably good acting. How else would anyone get past a job interview?
I know what you mean, its like at first they put on this "fake front" that we can't really sense and then after a while they start to show their true self, which is full of negativity.

Remember, your views and what you have to say matter to others AND to yourself
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post #30 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-25-2020, 10:29 AM
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From whose perspective am I meeting myself as? Everyone has a unique outlook and preconceived notions and pinpointing a specific conglomeration of characteristics/factors that determine who they like or dislike upon first meeting is a complex, intuitive process. If I am meeting myself as *me right now*, with my own set of memories and experiences, then I would primarily feel empathy and understanding for me and would accept me. But what if it was a bad day when I met myself? [[Uninteresting, awkward, not-conventionally attractive, not witty enough, the list goes on. It sucks to be you.]] You know what? No. I figure if I can't be likable to many others, then at least I can like myself and recognize that I'm doing my best with the knowledge I possess at this time. What good would hating myself do? I inhabit this body, for better or for worse, and all I can really do is work towards having sufficient reasons not to curse my own existence. Existence can be beautiful the moment you stare at these voices in the eye and tell them to **** off. Our conversation with my other self would probably not be that thrilling though since I am kind of quiet on introduction

I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger as reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn't impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more walls.
✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧
─ Anas Nin
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post #31 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-25-2020, 02:52 PM
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There can be only one

EDIT: to be more serious It'd be interesting to see myself on the outside looking in and get a sense of how others might perceive the things I say, do, and the ways I act. Not really the point of this thread but.

Life's Wack
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