Thanks for the replies everyone.
I definitely understand where some people are coming from... it tends to sound really bad when a person says they gave up on their dream, and most people would never encourage that kind of mentality.
But for me, it's more about coming to terms with the fact that the future I had envisioned for myself when I was younger is in no way compatible with the person I actually am.
When I was younger and my future was all ahead of me, I always imagined that soon I would move away from the area I grew up, live in a big city, have lots of fascinating friends and an exciting social life, travel to interesting places, and of course make a lot of money.
The anxiety has always been around, but it was something I always thought I would grow out of by then (now)...it didn't fit with the person I imagined myself to be. I still believe that somewhere deep down I am an extraverted outgoing person. I was as a little kid, and there have been moments and periods of my life where that person has come through, and it's awesome when that happens.
The problem is it's always been the exception, never the rule. Turning 30 last year (which is why I posted this in 30+) has forced me to face my current reality...my "future" is right now. I am fundamentally the person I am always going to be.
I know that you never stop growing and learning, but it's too late for me to keep thinking that I am going to somehow drastically change my personality and go into a line of work that is meant for people who thrive in high pressure situations, not people like me who can just barely manage to pull themselves together enough on a good day to make it through those situations, and are miserable the whole time.
What's also frustrating is that many of my friends from when I was younger have gone on to be incredibly, amazingly, frustratingly successful and are currently living the exact lives that I described myself hoping to have.
For a long time I kept thinking that I would soon catch up to them, that I was just a little bit of a late bloomer that made a few bad decisions and I would eventually get over my issues and pull it together.
Now it has gotten to the point where I barely keep in touch with them anymore, because I feel like I have nothing interesting to say compared to their amazing lives, and even just hearing about their great lives just sends me spiraling into depression and self-doubt. I know we are still friends but I don't blame them for growing apart from me, and I don't blame people for thinking I never reached my potential.
I hope this doesn't all come off horribly depressing. It just feels good to get it out and it's not that I'm completely miserable, it's just that I think about how my dreams and my reality are so far away and that it is 100% due to Social Anxiety...not a lack of effort, not a lack of resources or opportunity, just $%*&$%@ SA! And that it's entirely my fault for not coming to terms with it sooner in life and at least setting goals that were compatible with SA.