I have the opposite. I have a significant other who doesn't live near me and no friends. Making friends is extremely difficult because people want something I don't (sex or more time) or I just can't find people I connect with enough where they want to do activities with me. I guess there are 2 sides to the coin. You can have problems with an SO that you don't with friends, like they get moody at random times, or you could end up being cheated on or getting her pregnant and she leaves you and you need to pay child support. I guess, look on the bright side, you have some friends who care about you. They might also be able to give you some insight in things you could do to attract someone to you. Or a dating coach might be able to help. Its mostly putting yourself out there, being confident and taking care of yourself financially & physically. I think its just a numbers game. I got lucky.
There in lies the difference, in part. While I am doing my best to stay in shape, for my own benefit more than anyone else's, I have had trouble financially as I recently lost my job... Again. To be fair it was a crappy job with crappy pay. I have always wanted to do something important with my life, something that helps people. Anyway I digress. I think I made it out to sound like I have bunches of friends and that is not the case really. Some of the so called friends are more acquaintances than anything else, I rarely see them if at all except for the life they post on Facebook. I have some friends who I talk to about specific topics, games, movies, etc. I have maybe two friends that I communicate with regularly, one woman and one a man.
My problem is that, at a certain age, 30, being a virgin becomes a joke. People laugh when you tell them. It makes me feel like I'm not human, or that there is something wrong with me. I can appreciate the concerns you brought up, as they are very much a possibility, and not to mention the large number of STD's out there, but, In this juncture, I just want to know what it feels like to be everyone else. I don't want to laugh nervously or pretend that seeing women younger than me, pregnant, in in the store with their husbands. Sex is all over the place, movies, tv, music. It's like the fact that I haven't had it is constantly shoved in my face, and the only way to escape it is to avoid everything all together but that just makes me hate my life more.
Good looking bad boy gets the girl.Good looking nice guy gets the girl here and there.But ugly nice guy doesn't.
So that makes me the ugly nice guy then, cool thanks. Now I feel really confident about myself.
Yeah, it's a curse of those of us in the same boat, being complete losers in (non)relationships, that I can only laugh about this cruel fate now after too many years of never being in a relationship
I feel the same, though I wouldn't say I laugh. I know the pain, the agony, the feeling of questioning your self worth. I wish movies would depict the truth more, not the fake Hollywood endings where everyone turns out okay and the hero gets their lover in the end.
Most days I just try to keep busy with art or writing. It helps. Because of it my subject matter always tends to be dark and depressing, but what self respecting artist/ writer isn't, right?