When life doesn't seem worth it
A long debated topic in the subject of philosophy has been the idea that you can decide to end your life at any moment. My question here is "is life always worth living all the time?" You can look at this on an individual basis... what if somebody hates their life. They may hate it for something they did or didn't do. It could've been a set of mistakes they did not realize the magnitude of at the time which caused the situation to spiral out of control behind their back.
I've been playing a blame game in my head over the last year for some of the dumbest ****. It's a war of attrition and my ego is starving me. I'm trying to figure out whose fault it is and not realizing that it does not matter anymore. Even if I was to somehow figure it out IT WOULD NOT MATTER. It's silly, but this constant war in my head has caused me to completely lose sight of my potential future. I feel like I need to relearn how to properly perceive the world. The thought of suicide pops in my head sometimes and it's weird because I know it's wrong and not the answer, I would never do it. I can fight this thought, but there are people out there who choose not to and eventually go through with it.
We see depression as a disorder/illness, but IS IT REALLY??? I mean what is a disorder or a mental illness anyway? The last thing we want is everyone wanting to kill themselves, but a few here and there is not affecting the humans ability to survive. When you look at suicide on a personal/individual level everyone will say NO DON'T KILL YOURSELF THAT IS BAD, but as long as depression is not taking over the suicides don't matter as they may seem.
I consider myself an agnostic and I say this because I believe there is something spiritual about life. I cannot say what it is, but each generation is so similar in this very creative way. The journey of life is something else. Living a life is special.. YOU may not be special, but the process and living and learning is like a mind of its own. When a person kills themselves this creates fear and anxiety.. it's a way of showing that the society still has it's flaws. Suicide is no different from dying in a car accident, but the will to end your life and give up creates a disturbance and it shows us that there is something we must be working towards because we should NOT EVER WANT TO DIE.
I'm no scientist just throwing ideas around and seeing what you think.
"If you want to change the way people respond to you, change the way you respond to people"
“Saruman believes it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay… small acts of kindness and love.”