I want to become a writer and I am pretty serious about it. I am 18 years old and I will be 19 in another 11 days. Social anxiety has made my life awful. I have no friends. No girlfriend and my future is bleak. However I have decided to take an initiative to change myself. This is not the first time I have tried doing this, I have tried countless times to turn things around but I have always failed. Frankly there is no guarantee that things will work out this time either. But I will keep on trying because that is what I promised myself that night two years ago. My first goal in my journey to become a writer is to pass my A-level exams, if I don't pass them my parents will probably take me away from England and I need to be here if I want to become a published author. The odds are set against me here as well. I am doing very badly at school and I feel ashamed about it. I have a research project that was due in two weeks ago. It's about "Suicide in Japanese Literature and Popular Media" I suppose my first goal should be to finish this project, yeah that's what my goal is going to be. It's not like I am not interested in the topic, I chose it. I need a deadline, this Sunday is going to be it. Today is Tuesday, I must start today. The reason I need to post this here is because I think it will make me feel obliged to finish it. My final exams are not next month but the month after, June. But I think I should get rid of the project first. I will make a post this Sunday to let you know whether I was able to finish or not!
"Perhaps one did not want to be loved so much as to be understood."
- George Orwell