It is kind of bad to read that you are having to drink to meet women and then after all of that not even remember your triumph.
I am on Paxil and have even had a few drinks (at my stepsister's wedding, I had a bottle of beer, a margarita, and I think two amaretto sours. To me that is a HUGE amount of alcohol - I have never had that much in my life then or since. I spaced it out, and didn't even have much of a buzz.
I would look into you particular fears here. It sounds as if they are overwhelming you to the point where you have to numb the "pain".