Re: Understanding is key, right?
Understanding doesn't only have to be gathered by ourselves, we don't have to do this alone, there is good help out there if you seek it.
The assistance of a trained objective professional, ie psychologist completes the ingredients I've personally required to change and get better. And since it's a social anxiety, the more people involved in the healing process the better is has been for me.
All the self help books in the world are not enough but many have motivated me and provided some insights that have been helpful. Greater understanding has come from accepting my feelings and fears totally and not running from them to slip into analysis paralysis!