Social Anxiety Forum - View Single Post - My life is so boring because I've basically isolated myself besides work and the random...
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post #3 of (permalink) Old 03-25-2020, 11:32 AM
SAS Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Drifting somewhere in the Oort Cloud
Posts: 15
My Mood: Fine
Its quite likely that the way you are framing how you are experiencing life and the meaning you have of the words you have written and have in your mind, are the cause of why you feel as you do, or they a key component.

This is not your fault or anyone's really, since we are all raised to live life in a particular & narrow way and to believe in a long list of things, and of thing that we should/shouldn't do, what is right and wrong, good/bad, etc etc. All of these things just come down to opinions and so they do not exist in reality - we just think they are real or that they really exist.

Boredom, for example, is a self-created state, caused by the massive overstimulation of the mind and also, by the inculcation of the idea that "we must always be doing". This is an idea which is deeply woven into the fabric of our society and which we see manifested in numerous ways, but it is rarely blatantly expressed in such a way.
No-one teaches us how to do nothing and yet, it is important for all of us to do just that. There is actually nothing for us to "do" anyway, once we have taken care of our biological needs, the same way all other living things do.
We are the only living thing that doesn't understand doing nothing and also, we are the only species which perpetually engages in things that have nothing to do with meeting our needs. Despite all our grandiose opinions of ourselves and of our greatness, humans have not improved on what nature has already provided - not one iota.

The feeling we call boredom comes about as a reaction of not having something to distract our mind. And what often happens in this situation is that because it is not a state that we are familiar with, we immediately try to escape this feeling, by finding something to do or by reaching out to someone, or by going online, etc.
In addition to this response, thoughts that we'd rather not have come to our mind and our response is the same - we try to escape/runaway from those thoughts by seeking some form of distraction.

The key to solving the boredom issue, is to face what you seek to avoid. And once you do that, over time, you won't be sacred of nothing, of stillness and quietness.
And if you want to go further, you can explore the thoughts you may have and question their validity (they won't have any btw).

So how do you enjoy life?

By seeing what is preventing you from doing so. You need to explore all the thoughts that come to your mind and then question them - all of them. Also, the thoughts you have are not yours or anyone else's. They are just thoughts and we don't know why they come to us, when they do, or why which ones come.

You may not feel like you have happiness (or anyone else who suffers too), but you actually have your real happiness right now. Its just that because you are suffering, you are unable to experience that happiness. Suffering is a like a block or barrier or a wall to your happiness.
This happiness is the same one you probably had as a child and it is just sitting there. Always has been, always will do. Its the same for all of us.

Suffering, in all its forms, is the only barrier to experiencing true uninterrupted happiness and peace. Once you remove all suffering, what is left is that peace and happiness you had as a child. Happiness cannot be ended by anything external to your mind and likewise, happiness cannot be created or obtained by anything external to your mind.
This is why billionaires can be just as unhappy as people who are homeless or people who have very little.

I can send you resources to flesh out some of the above, if you are interested. Glad to chat/help too.
Ferrox is offline  
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