I was the same way. I would rely on alcohol and other stuff every time i went out. It helped in a way because before that i had trouble just having a conversation. My body hated it and I always ended up saying something that I regret and then I would beat myself up. Moderation.
So do you have any other ways that you cope with your social anxiety now? I'm definitely open to new ways on how to handle it, but alcohol is just the easiest I've found so far. One thing I'm good at is handling my alcohol, so I never say anything I regret. But when I drink, I just feel normal to be honest. It calms my social anxiety and it relieves me of any emotions I have toward myself or others. It just works right now. But I'd love to hear about any other coping mechanisms you've found that help. Thanks!