Mom's sister is taking care of their Dad. Despite the fact they have TWO brothers. I just want to have my OWN company (that's not the right word)-my friends have their fiances and my parents have each other. Even my older SISTER has an "unoffical" boyfriend (they do stuff most weekends), Until before Christmas 4 of my cousins had "other half" (Cousin Er- had a husband for years, and now they have a 2 year (?) old daughter, her half-sibling Liz still has a boyfriend, their other sister (Liz's full sibling, and Er's other half-sister)-did have a fiance until late last year) we have another cousin who had a a boyfriend for years. And we have an old dog of my sister's and once we have to put her down they will NOT be geting another dog-so I have no company of my own..nothing for ME to take care of (and my parents expect me to take care of THEM in the future)? Plants don't communicate back to you (I know neither does a baby either)
I hate people talking about their "other half" because I can't bloody join in because I DON'T have one of my own. The other month -person 1 was asking Person 2 (who had divorced his ex-wife some years previously) with like 2 other people beside myself at the table if Person 2 wanted to get back into dating again. I was like "Can we please change the subject?-its sore for me" it took me a couple of tries to get her (Person 1) to understand. I do ask people about their other half just to be nice. But if people bring it out I just want to leave society at all because with my luck I will never get a boyfriend until after child-bearing years. I want to be dating during my child-bearing years so I can have some children.
Sure I'm surround (sort of) with people-I just feel so lonely- its like there is a Blank Space in my heart- and I know dating is a risky game and I'm not sure how I would handle break-ups or I think I would be very jealous ("drunk on jealously") or be very clingy due to have NO experience in the dating world at all boyfriend 0 since 2004-
I hope you find what you're looking for.