My reality makes me uncomfortable, yes. Always has.
Partially due to mental illlness, but also due to my surroundings.
I have never partaken in drug use and never will. I'd rather be cast into the blinding light of my reality than to become what I hate most. Drugs are for cool people and I am the antithesis of what cool is. I am quite predesposed to becoming an alcoholic and I will not let that happen.
I look at all of my possible realities and realise I am living in the worst one.
I am uncomfortable with reality, but I have no other choice than to live in it. The life of a despised loner is what's been chosen for me and I will play my role to a hilt.
He who makes a beast out of himself, gets rid of the pain of being a man.