never. i never express anger. people that express their anger kind of scare me. a colleague gets frustrated pretty easily and a while back she was saying she was going to lose it and punching her open hand really hard repeatedly. that's a kind of threatening thing. and my ex who had BPD would totally lose it. screaming at passing cars. when someone is losing control of themselves that is pretty scary to me.
I couldn't deal with "her" obvious BPD. I almost committed "reactive abuse" the last time I saw her, which is totally out of character for me, when she was assaulting me, tore my shirt off and throwing my stuff out the door. I through her on the bed and held her down for a bit and said "calm the **** down, *****" which still bothers me because I never knew what I was fully dealing with, and it was the first time I'd ever spoke to her like that. I would never have hit her because I just can't do it, but I did get physical by throwing her on the bed and holding her down. I had to do that though because she started strangling me and digging her thumbs into my carotid arteries.
If she behaves like this with the wrong person, she's gonna get ****ed up or killed.